About
Community
Bad Ideas
Drugs
Ego
Erotica
Fringe
Society
Technology
register | bbs | search | rss | faq | about
meet up | add to del.icio.us | digg it
Go Back   Community > Society > My God Can Beat the Shit Out of Your God
Register FAQ Members List Calendar Today's Posts

My God Can Beat the Shit Out of Your God For discussing any and all religious viewpoints. Intolerance will not be tolerated. Keeping your sense of humor is required. Posting messages about theological paradoxes is encouraged.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1   Add only black man in vermont to your ignore list  
Old 2007-06-30, 02:59
only black man in vermont only black man in vermont is offline
Regular
 
Default Athiests as a majority

This is what it would be like if the majority of people were athiests:

ATHIEST KID: Mom, I'm going to go fuck a hooker.
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, son.
ATHIEST KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, come home soon!

The athiest kid leaves the room. The father comes home from work several minutes later.

ATHIEST DAD: Hey!
ATHIEST MOM: Hi, honey! I'm pregnant again. I guess I'll just get another abortion, since "fetuses don't count as human life."
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, get as many abortions as you want!
ATHIEST MOM: Oh, and don't go in the bedroom.
ATHIEST DAD: Why not?
ATHIEST MOM: There are two gay men fucking eachother in there.
ATHIEST DAD: Why are they here?
ATHIEST MOM: I wanted to watch them do it for awhile. They just aren't finished yet.
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, that's fine with me!

Suddenly, their neighbor runs into the house.

ATHIEST NEIGHBOR: Come quick, there's a Christian outside!
ATHIEST MOM: We'll be right there!

The athiest couple quickly put on a pair of black robes and hoods. They then exit the house, and run into the street, where a Christian is nailed to a large, wooden X. He is being burned alive. A crowd of athiests stand around him, all wearing black robes and hoods.

RANDOM ATHIEST: Damn you, Christian! We hate you! We claim to be tolerant of all religions. But we really hate your's! That's because we athiests are hypocritical like that! Die, Christian!

THE END
Reply With Quote
  #2   Add KikoSanchez to your ignore list  
Old 2007-06-30, 03:10
KikoSanchez KikoSanchez is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

LOL that was funny. Did you find this in one of those Christian propaganda pamphlets?? I'm almost crying it's so funny hahahaha.
Reply With Quote
  #3   Add KikoSanchez to your ignore list  
Old 2007-06-30, 03:11
KikoSanchez KikoSanchez is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Those 'athiests' sound like funny people. Atleast they're not making fun of atheists, not that it would offend me.
Reply With Quote
  #4   Add 23 to your ignore list  
Old 2007-06-30, 03:26
23 23 is offline
Regular
 
http://tinyurl.com/28ozhm
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Atheism is not absence of morals.

It is absence of God.
Reply With Quote
  #5   Add SilentMind to your ignore list  
Old 2007-06-30, 03:28
SilentMind SilentMind is offline
Regular
 
Florida, US
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Most ignorant thread of the day.

Congratulations.
Reply With Quote
  #6   Add Pilsu to your ignore list  
Old 2007-06-30, 03:42
Pilsu Pilsu is offline
Regular
 
Finland
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Nah he got it exactly right. Gay men are become a very trendy living room ornament
Reply With Quote
  #7   Add devilsadvocate to your ignore list  
Old 2007-06-30, 07:46
devilsadvocate devilsadvocate is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

ok pal...first off

1)bieng an athiest does not dictate that one has an absence of care for life,,,it just means theres an absence of god in your belief of life

2) thats a bit extremist what you said,and sounds very alien like to be described in any family life,,,a mother wouldnt change if she was athiest,she actually might want her son to smoke pot to an even less degree since she be more open to exploring what certain habits contribute to one health,and an willingness to question the pros and cons

3) you sir are the epitome of a ignoraneous

and o and i tip my hat off to you,i hope one day i can match the maturity that youve exampled -_-
Reply With Quote
  #8   Add Prometheum to your ignore list  
Old 2007-07-01, 03:16
Prometheum Prometheum is offline
Regular
 
01 Send a message via AIM to Prometheum Send a message via MSN to Prometheum
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Quote:
Originally Posted by devilsadvocate View Post
ok pal...first off

1)bieng an athiest does not dictate that one has an absence of care for life,,,it just means theres an absence of god in your belief of life

2) thats a bit extremist what you said,and sounds very alien like to be described in any family life,,,a mother wouldnt change if she was athiest,she actually might want her son to smoke pot to an even less degree since she be more open to exploring what certain habits contribute to one health,and an willingness to question the pros and cons

3) you sir are the epitome of a ignoraneous

and o and i tip my hat off to you,i hope one day i can match the maturity that youve exampled -_-
iawtc
Reply With Quote
  #9   Add Q777 to your ignore list  
Old 2007-07-01, 03:25
Q777 Q777 is offline
Regular
 
⊕
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

The original poster probably got this off http://www.fstdt.com/ (Fundies Say the Darndest Things) or may be the original author.
Reply With Quote
  #10   Add random_jew to your ignore list  
Old 2007-07-01, 05:07
random_jew random_jew is offline
Regular
 
Canada Send a message via MSN to random_jew
Question Re: Athiests as a majority

Are all believers of faith this naive or is this one an abnormality?
Reply With Quote
 #11 
Old 2007-07-01, 05:37
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Unfortunatley the world is moving towards that direction. :(
 #12 
Old 2007-07-01, 10:23
AsylumSeaker AsylumSeaker is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Sounds like paradise!
 #13 
Old 2007-07-01, 13:25
Regular
 
Canada
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

ATHIEST KID: Mom, I'm going to go fuck a hooker.
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, son.

Well, so long as he wears a rubber, why not?


ATHIEST KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
ATHIEST MOM: Okay, come home soon!

Well, it's NOT...

ATHIEST DAD: Hey!
ATHIEST MOM: Hi, honey! I'm pregnant again. I guess I'll just get another abortion, since "fetuses don't count as human life."

And they don't!


ATHIEST DAD: Okay, get as many abortions as you want!

Homie knows where it's at.


ATHIEST MOM: Oh, and don't go in the bedroom.
ATHIEST DAD: Why not?
ATHIEST MOM: There are two gay men fucking eachother in there.
ATHIEST DAD: Why are they here?
ATHIEST MOM: I wanted to watch them do it for awhile. They just aren't finished yet.
ATHIEST DAD: Okay, that's fine with me!

Homosexual men; the ultimate living room decoration!


Suddenly, their neighbor runs into the house.

ATHIEST NEIGHBOR: Come quick, there's a Christian outside!
ATHIEST MOM: We'll be right there!

I only get this excited when my neighbour runs in and tells me that there's a car accident at the end of the street.


The athiest couple quickly put on a pair of black robes and hoods. They then exit the house, and run into the street, where a Christian is nailed to a large, wooden X. He is being burned alive. A crowd of athiests stand around him, all wearing black robes and hoods.

Wait a minute...


RANDOM ATHIEST: Damn you, Christian! We hate you! We claim to be tolerant of all religions. But we really hate your's! That's because we athiests are hypocritical like that! Die, Christian!

Happy EndingsRoll Eyes (Sarcastic)
 #14 
Old 2007-07-02, 22:13
hojadepapel hojadepapel is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Quote:
Originally Posted by 23
Atheism is not absence of morals.

It is absence of God.


Fucking win.

PS I think I just ejaculated while reading that over.
 #15 
Old 2007-07-02, 22:39
Irregular Irregular is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pilsu
Nah he got it exactly right. Gay men are become a very trendy living room ornament


rofl.
 #16 
Old 2007-07-03, 02:25
socratic socratic is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Since when did religion disallow narcotics? Jesus was MAKING booze. John was taking Wormwood out the wazoo.
 #17 
Old 2007-07-03, 04:14
FunkyZombie FunkyZombie is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

I want to be offended but it's so over the top I can't take it seriously even though I know there are people who believe that shit.

It's like people who believe Jews have horns. The insult is counterbalanced by the sheer ridiculous jaw dropping stupidity being displayed.
 #18 
Old 2007-07-03, 05:13
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Fucking win.

PS I think I just ejaculated while reading that over.

I think you've unintentionally proven the OP's point. :)
 #19 
Old 2007-07-03, 23:42
socratic socratic is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

I think you've unintentionally proven the OP's point. :)

I think you've unintentionally proven you have no sense of humour.
 #20 
Old 2007-07-04, 00:47
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

it's a joke for the lulz, so lulz up
 #21 
Old 2007-07-04, 05:00
Regular
 
Illinois
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Quote:
Originally Posted by 23
Atheism is not absence of morals.

It is absence of God.


That's all that needs to be said.
 #22 
Old 2007-07-04, 05:13
shitty wok shitty wok is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

http://romaine.home.pipeline.com/pics/cat/jpgs/Cat-shame-Img_0660.jpg
 #23 
Old 2007-07-05, 05:57
zik zik is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Quote:
Originally Posted by 23
Atheism is not absence of morals.

It is absence of God.


True, but you shouldn't stop there. Once realizing that there isn't a God, you should begin to question morals. Why continue to think in black and white once you've discovered color?
 #24 
Old 2007-07-05, 06:57
vagabondtramp vagabondtramp is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

am i the only one who thinks, without the burning of people on the cross, that this wouldn't be so bad?
 #25 
Old 2007-07-05, 07:01
zik zik is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Quote:
Originally Posted by vagabondtramp
am i the only one who thinks, without the burning of people on the cross, that this wouldn't be so bad?


You're not alone, and I don't even mind the burning of the people on crosses all that much.
 #26 
Old 2007-07-05, 07:06
vagabondtramp vagabondtramp is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

You're not alone, and I don't even mind the burning of the people on crosses all that much.


yeah, but you know people. once they run out of christians, they'll start burning everyone else:D
 #27 
Old 2007-07-05, 07:37
niggersexual niggersexual is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

This is the best, jajaja. Completely true!
 #28 
Old 2007-07-05, 21:24
Sententiae Sententiae is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

This is what it would be like if the majority of people were christians:

CHRISTIAN KID: Mom, I'm going to go fuck a another choir girl so she can go the school for the knocked up.
CHRISTIAN MOM: Okay, son.
CHRISTIAN KID: Afterwards, I'm going to go smoke pot with my friends, since it's "not addictive."
CHRISTIAN MOM: Okay, come home soon!

The CHRISTIAN kid leaves the room. The father comes home from work several minutes later.

CHRISTIAN DAD: Hey!
CHRISTIAN MOM: Hi, honey! I'm pregnant again. I guess I'll just have another baby we can't afford so it can suffer and then be an added burden on the adoption system when we get rid of it.
CHRISTIAN DAD: Okay, have as many retarded babies as you want.
CHRISTIAN MOM: Oh, and don't go in the bedroom.
CHRISTIAN DAD: Why not?
CHRISTIAN MOM: There's a priest in there molesting our 4 daughters
CHRISTIAN DAD: Why are they here?
CHRISTIAN MOM: I wanted to watch them do it for awhile. They just aren't finished yet.
CHRISTIAN DAD: Okay, that's fine with me!

Suddenly, their neighbor runs into the house.

CHRISTIAN NEIGHBOR: Come quick, there's a ATHEIST outside!
CHRISTIAN MOM: We'll be right there!

The christian couple quickly put on a pair of white robes and hoods. They then exit the house, and run into the street, where ANY NON-CHRISTIAN is nailed to a large, wooden X. He is being burned alive. A crowd of CHRISTIANS stand around him, all wearing black robes and hoods.

RANDOM CHRISTIAN: Damn you, ATHEIST! We hate you! We claim to be tolerant of all religions. But we really hate your's! That's because we CHRISTIANS are hypocritical like that! Die, ATHEIST!

THE END


Funny how if you just change the names, it's the same damn scenario. And why do only atheists smoke pot? I know plenty of christians who do, since there's no prohibition against it. Seems kinda silly to me to throw that in there. Hell, our president did alot worse than that, and we all know how down with God he is.
 #29 
Old 2007-07-06, 01:56
Regular
 
Utah: Mountains, Mormons, Meth
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

^^^ lol, Christians w/ white hoods FTW!
 #30 
Old 2007-07-06, 22:04
niggersexual niggersexual is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

The Christian one wasn't funny at all. The Christian stereotypes are so tired that they really aren't funny. In fact, pretty much all stereotypes aren't very funny.
 #31 
Old 2007-07-08, 04:39
random_jew random_jew is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Quote:
Originally Posted by vagabondtramp
am i the only one who thinks, without the burning of people on the cross, that this wouldn't be so bad?


So you approve of two guys fucking in your living room...

I wanna watch you get outta this one.
 #32 
Old 2007-07-08, 07:11
karma_sleeper karma_sleeper is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

Quote:
Originally Posted by KikoSanchez
it's a joke for the lulz, so lulz up


srsly feel the lulz within you.
 #33 
Old 2007-07-08, 07:38
vagabondtramp vagabondtramp is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Athiests as a majority

So you approve of two guys fucking in your living room...

I wanna watch you get outta this one.

not me personally, but if someone wanted to watch two guys fucking in their own house, i couldn't really give two shits. it's not hurting anyone if the husband doesn't mind it either.
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

 
To the best of our knowledge, the text on this page may be freely reproduced and distributed.
 

totse.com certificate signatures
 
 
About | Community | Bad Ideas | Drugs | Ego | Erotica | Fringe | Society | Technology
Hot Topics