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| Sex and Affection Anything and everything about sex and relations. Please try to keep this forum on-topic, since things tend to wander a bit. Search through old topics before posting a new one, as questions get repeated a lot here. |
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# 1

2007-06-29, 00:09
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Regular
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A jerk circle with me and him>
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Butt crack hair?
Ok so me and my friend was talking, he joked about something with buttcrack hair, and I asked whats so bad about it? He said its gross and the girls will not want to have sex with it, anyone with it should get waxed.
So im only 15 and my but crack hair is like a damn jungle, and im only 15!
So is it that bad, or should I be a man and leave it there?
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# 2

2007-06-29, 00:11
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Re: Butt crack hair?
thats the dumbest shit i've ever heard
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# 3

2007-06-29, 00:13
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Regular
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Scotland
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Lmao. You'll find that when you start sexing girls, only about 1 out of 3 will be nicely shaven down there, so your friend is speaking nonsense(unless he's had a bad experience himself).
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# 4

2007-06-29, 00:13
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Regular
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Florida, US
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Be a man, use tweasers.
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# 5

2007-06-29, 00:30
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Re: Butt crack hair?
When I'm in bed I like to play with it between my fingers and tie it in a knot. Then I pull it off.
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# 6

2007-06-29, 00:31
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Regular
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gloucesterVA US
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Re: Butt crack hair?
I think it is time to find the butt-hair shaving story.
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# 7

2007-06-29, 00:44
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Regular
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Starts with U, ends with SA
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Say hello to your little friend.
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# 8

2007-06-29, 00:59
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Regular
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within the subliminal
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Your butt-hair is a symbol of your manhood, show it with pride!!
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# 9

2007-06-29, 01:08
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Regular
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Austin TX USA
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Dude, my ass hair is the secret to my pimping power. Love your ass hair, and the world will love yoU!
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# 10

2007-06-29, 01:08
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Regular
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......
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Don't Shave That Hair!!!
I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble shitting.
No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my ass-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my asscheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold.
I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.
I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my ass of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My ass was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.
Little did I know.
I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two asscheeks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry.
Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic shit- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky shit/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm.
Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering shit/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my ass cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own shit blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks."
Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my ass at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for ass-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my asscheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil.
As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your ass having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.
Friends, DON'T SHAVE YOUR ASS-HAIR!
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#11
 2007-06-29, 01:10
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succhia 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Unless you get a girl that likes giving rim jobs, I wouldn't worry about it.
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#12
 2007-06-29, 01:16
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I touch myself at night 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Wow guys thanks, I regret even thinking of shaving my ass hair! :)
And yea my friend was wrong
Im keeping my manhood 
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#13
 2007-06-29, 01:17
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Doc Oxy Ph.D. 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Let it grow until it comes down into a little horsetail behind you, chicks dig that!
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#14
 2007-06-29, 02:17
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GloriousG 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
I have been very successful in waxing by myself at Home!
But lol, it still keeps growing, and trust me after about 3 days, when the hair will start growing back oo wee, it feels like needles comin out.
Waxing definetly makes it smoooooth as hell like a baby. For a couple of days, and for that couple days only, it will feel so worth it. After that well you'll go through an "annoyance" period and then eventually your hairs will simmer down.
Thing about waxing is that you have to keeep waxing on and on and on for years, decades since your only 15, till the growth rate finally starts slowing down noticeably. Shaving is even worse, 15-30 times worse.
Simply: If your fukin a bitch that chu don lUv, dont shave it nigga, who cares, who is she going to tell? nobody, since u aint no lovin hurr, you dont care that she might not get the best experience.
If you loves the bitch and youz gon get married n shit, den she shoudlnt curr about no butt harr nigga... Even if she did, who cares, she loves you, she wont leave you. youz only 15, you aint in luvv nigga. Don't wax or shave, maybe get it permanently removed.
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#15
 2007-06-29, 02:20
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CarbonB 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Quote:
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Originally Posted by DL
Don't Shave That Hair!!!
I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble shitting.
No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my ass-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my asscheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold.
I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.
I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my ass of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My ass was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.
Little did I know.
I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two asscheeks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry.
Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic shit- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky shit/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm.
Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering shit/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my ass cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own shit blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks."
Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my ass at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for ass-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my asscheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil.
As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your ass having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.
Friends, DON'T SHAVE YOUR ASS-HAIR!
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Provides friction? No, it isn't that it provides friction but allows space so moisture cannot give you a rash.
If your ass hair was so long, why didn't you just fucking TRIM IT! Jesus Christ, a hairy mother fucker does not have to wax his entire body, just trim the shit. Then wax your back, most women will be extremely impressed and happy with that. Oh, and get some mother fucking braces because I know you need them bitch.
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#16
 2007-06-29, 03:21
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Crack Man 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Provides friction? No, it isn't that it provides friction but allows space so moisture cannot give you a rash.
If your ass hair was so long, why didn't you just fucking TRIM IT! Jesus Christ, a hairy mother fucker does not have to wax his entire body, just trim the shit. Then wax your back, most women will be extremely impressed and happy with that. Oh, and get some mother fucking braces because I know you need them bitch.
he didnt write that, it was from a website aloooonnngggg time ago
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#17
 2007-06-29, 03:29
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woopsueypigs77 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Provides friction? No, it isn't that it provides friction but allows space so moisture cannot give you a rash.
If your ass hair was so long, why didn't you just fucking TRIM IT! Jesus Christ, a hairy mother fucker does not have to wax his entire body, just trim the shit. Then wax your back, most women will be extremely impressed and happy with that. Oh, and get some mother fucking braces because I know you need them bitch.
What fucking rock have you been living under?
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#18
 2007-06-29, 04:27
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getoffmylawn 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Yeah I had a bunch of that when I was about 14-15 and it isn't even really noticable. Girls will think it stretches from the sack to the crack and don't understand the complexities of the "taint" "chode" or "gooch." With a bj they wont notice if you're fucking them wtf is she doing looking at YOUR ass.
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#19
 2007-06-29, 16:45
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genericwittyusername 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Yeah I have that hair, no one cares, I still get plenty of sex... It's not like the girls i'm with have any desire to go anywhere near my ass crack. I hope the ones you fuck don't, either. I mean, unless you're into that.
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#20
 2007-06-29, 20:17
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Ok so me and my friend was talking, he joked about something with buttcrack hair, and I asked whats so bad about it? He said its gross and the guys will not want to have sex with it, anyone with it should get waxed.
So im only 15 and my but crack hair is like a damn jungle, and im only 15! :(
So is it that bad, or should I be a man and leave it there?
Fixed.
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#21
 2007-06-29, 20:44
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Bast 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
A little bit is cute. I don't like super hairy wookie butts, but a little fuzz is okie dokie in my book.
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#22
 2007-07-01, 01:59
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I touch myself at night 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
I like to get slammed in the ass untill eventually all my shit is blended up so that it just kinda slowly falls out while I get slammed, I then eat it and I love it when the other guy has buttcrack hair.
Fixed
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#23
 2007-07-01, 07:37
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Pseud0nym 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
I've trimmed it a few times. Works well but it gets quite tedious, so don't bother until sex becomes regular.
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#24
 2007-07-01, 15:38
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totse_is_nothing 
Regular
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Re: Butt crack hair?
Quote:
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Originally Posted by orangekowsisgay
thats the dumbest shit i've ever heard
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Agreed.
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