Me and my girlfriend was having a conversation the other day, I was saying that ‘cheating’ isn’t as bad if it is with a prostitute. She disagreed.

I don’t see how cheating with a prostitute can be seen as “cheating” for a start, the thing that annoys me about cheating is the going behind somebodies back; in effect, it is having an intimate relationship whilst being in another loving relationship. But this isn’t the case with a prostitute. With a prostitute there is no intimacy from the start, you are the purchaser of a service, it is sexual, but it is upfront about what it is… there is no pretending to be in love, you both know it is sexual. I see prostitutes as simply fulfilling male instinctual desires; they in no way represent love, a relationship or commitment. You even pay for the service, which really means it is a ‘service’, not anything else except something you pay for and they fulfil.

If I was a woman, I would much rather my husband cheat on me with a prostitute than another woman, for the simple fact that there wouldn’t be emotions involved in it. I would know that he paid for it, I would now that there was no future between them, and I would know that there was no emotions involved.

Me and my girlfriend even tried to expand this scenario to a ‘happy ending’ massage. If I was overseas by myself and went to a massage parlour to get off, I didn’t really see this as cheating. She saw it very differently.

I know that each of these situations may be pushing the boundaries of a relationship (I know this) but what I am asking is whether or not they are really cheating. Your partner doesn’t have to know about it, it is completely anonymous, and there are no emotions involved, is it still cheating!?

So, I am asking totse, what is cheating and what is acceptable behaviour?

There is no such thing as cheating or a relationship, or even a marriage. They are fantasies; creations of the human mind.

prostitues aren't people so it's the same rules as if you cheated with a robot.

You have a point, but it is still cheating. Relationships are about two people. Not two people and a fuck buddy or prostitute...

If you are in a relationship where you actually care about your partner you wouldn't go else where for sex.

But I am talking more about preferences. Everybody will probably say having sex with a prostitute is 'cheating', but isn't it a far lesser form of cheating? Like... a kind of cheating that can be forgiven a lot easier than if it was with another willing partner?

An escort is a person like anybody else. It's just a job. They don't deserve all the disrespect that gets heaped upon them.

Cheating begins when you value another man or woman more than you value your partner; it grows from there. It's up to you, or your partner, to make those choices.

If you're looking for an escort and you're in a relationship, then you're valuing sex with someone else more than you value sex with your partner; even if that's not true, it is how it appears.

Escorts are plenty willing. Cheating is not something easily forgiven by most, I can't think that cheating with an escort makes it any easier.

Sure am glad I saved a good amount of money for all the escorts I'm gonna do this summer :)

k...so your saying you wouldnt get mad if you found out your girl had been paying a male escort to marinate her beef curtains?

Exactly.

Also, how would you react Vizzini if your found out that she was paying to have sex with a male escort instead of having sex with you?

Exactly.

Also, how would you react Vizzini if your found out that she was paying to have sex with a male escort instead of having sex with you?

Well, that was part of our discussion actually. I would feel bad, but I wouldn't feel like she cheated on me. I would be angry, but it would be a lot easier to forgive her if she paid for it.... at the end of the day I would probably feel sorry for her.

going to a escort says one thing to me: somebody isnt keeping up the effort back home.

a relationship where either person goes to someone else for pleasure has some serious problems, and probably isnt worth the trouble of trying to fix it. Because it will fail somewhere down the line. Except for swingers or couples into that shit.

It starts with an escort or prostitute. It wont stop there.

Would you not feel offended that they went somewhere else though?!

Cheating means to go outside the rules, or to take away from your opposition the ability to have whats rightfully theirs. As long as your sleeping with someone doesn't go outside the rules of the relationship,or doesn't take away from your partner. It's not cheating.

What if one of the partners is overseas for an extended period of time. They choose to go to an 'erotic' massage parlor instead of going out and looking for sex. Isn't this far more acceptable than going out and finding a female for the sole purpose of sex?

Of course I would be offended, but I would be able to forgive them soon after (if they were regretful). If my girlfriend actually cheated on me with a stranger I don't think I could forgive her.

You could forgive her if she slept with an escort but not if it wasnt paid for?

I guess it comes down to how you see each other and the relationship. Either way I would be pretty pissed if my girlfriend slept with someone else, paid for or not.

As harde said it depends on what the 'rules' are.

What if one of the partners is overseas for an extended period of time. They choose to go to an 'erotic' massage parlor instead of going out and looking for sex. Isn't this far more acceptable than going out and finding a female for the sole purpose of sex?

Im in Iraq. So i know what its like. Been here for 12 months, 3 left. And I stand by my decision. Shes making the commitment to not fuck around, so I will too.

And yes I would leave my girl if she even kissed some other guy. Yet alone pay for sex. Theres some things that are reserved for just your partner. Sex is one of them. If it isnt, why be in the relationship?

However you look at it, your sharing passion with another person. Even though its nothing but lust.

What if you cross the international date line, and make it the day before, just for a few minutes... then it would be like it never happened, right?

My point is, women look at cheating differently than men. My gf told me that cyber sex was cheating too... I asked her to explain, there is no overt act, (nothing I woulnd't have done anyway) and I don't really know the person I was "with". She still said it's cheating. so there you go, my 2 cents

It depends on the agreements with your partner if it's cheatin, not on OUR opinion about it.

I have the faint feeling your just an asshole lookin for an excuse to bang a whore without feelin guilty

if I was in a relationship, and he felt the need to go looking for sex elsewhere, no matter how empty and emotionless that sex might be I'd still be really, really fucking hurt that I couldn't please him well enough and he had to go looking for other sources.

at the end of the day I would probably feel sorry for her.
If your girlfriend paid for sex over screwing you then you're the one i would feel sorry for.
Personally I would say a prostitute is cheating as its breaking one of those boundaries that a relationship is all about that of trust, unless of course youre in a polygamous relationship then in which case fuck away

How is that any different then picking a girl up at a club or a bar or a party, and then never calling her again?

your fucking retarded as hell for thinking that isnt cheating. you probably need to go die cuz you'll end up cheating on a girl. i hope you die soon.

Have fun with AIDS.

You're an idiot...you were just trying to start an argument with her...

It's not cheating, even in biblical times men had mistresses for pleasure. They were called concubines.

Also, in Asian countries, it is acceptable for a man to go out and have sex with whomever he wants, provided they pay for it. As long as it's paid for, it's not considered cheating.

Guy: Honey, I did something horrible...I feel so bad, I'm really sorry, but...
Woman: What? What did you do?!
Guy: No, no it's not that...I...I had sex with another woman.
Woman: What?! How could you?!
Guy: Well I gave her like 20 bucks...
Woman: Oh, well why didn't you just say so?

**Make-up sex**

Sounds like a win-win.