Before I start i'll let you know this does involve teenage girls, but i'll keep it mature for totse's sake.

A bit of backstory:
Two years ago I met this girl, she was a trainwreck and I helped to get her back onto the right track (no pun intended). She was a sex addict, a self-injurer(SI) and had a bit of a drug problem. All at 15, brilliant.

Fast forward to today; someone has posted a whole mess of her personal letters, notes, etc. to other people. All of them delt with her having sex with everyone and anyone (she has had probably upwards of 15 different partners, many of them at the same time). My question to you is: Do you blame her for her actions?

Personally after knowing what shes gone through and whats happened to her I can't hold her 100% accountable for her own actions. She is an admitted sex addict who has tried to get help, but the majority of people blow her off as a whore and don't have anything to do with her.

:(

Well, I can see that this girl that you are helping is having a tough time.With a bad reputation,I can see why.See,she is trying to change her image,who she is,and she wants people to take her seriously. She is trying to become a well rounded individual,and people should respect that.

But think about the other people too.Her whore reputation will stick with her a long time.People dont want to be involved with that.It's sad,but it is hard to change what people think about you.

For a long time, I would be a dick to people and talk shit and make jokes at other people's expenses.People thought I was the funny guy for a while,but now all my classmates hate me and think I'm a prick,so I only have a few good friends,who do the same thing.I have tried to be nicer,but people only remember the first impression.

Hopefully your friend can turn it around,but when you are bad and then turn good,people still remember how bad you were.

As for your question,I can not blame her for being whorey,but she should aknowledge what she has done to improve herself.I will say that I was a fucking jerk, and she should say that she was slutty.You can't blame her for something that happened long ago.

My question to you is: Do you blame her for her actions?

This sentence right here is the entire problem.

For what should we blame her? Blame is for doing bad things.

She was doing what young people do. She didn't kill someone.

She fucked around, did some drugs, cut herself. I am not impressed.

I would fuck 100 chicks if the opportunity presented itself, and if they wanted me to smoke some pot or pop a pill in order to do it, you bet your ass I would.

And I grew up in an amazing household, poor maybe, and no father figure, but my mother was the bomb. I am responsible for every action I made/will make, and I don't see any problems with that girl that should have us "blaming" her.

Maybe blame isn't exactly the best word. What I was trying to get at was do you think she should be held one hundred percent accountable for her actions even though shes attempted to get help. We are not talking about the drugs or the cutting, its the sex this time around. I think its rather unfair that all of her personal things were posted in a public forum (myspace...sigh) by someone whos heart she broke.

Thanks for the input though.

I am not understanding why this question is important to you.

She did the acts, they are done, she can't take them back.

People know, this also can't be undone.

So what are you trying to solve by asking us if she should be held accountable for her actions? If she doesn't have any sort of mental retardation, then yes, she is responsible, whether she was brainwashed or whatever. But that doesn't mean you can't have sympathy for her.

Her life growing up most likely was the reason she "wanted" to do these things, but in the end, we still have our own minds which we can discuss thoughts with no outside influence, and using our own conclusions, we decide to do an action or not. We weigh consequences vs. benefits, and at that time in her life, the benefits were more important.

The questions important because their is currently a shit-fit going on over this mess and I was just curious what you all here had to say. I like you streetjustice, you bring a bit of a new perspective to things.

Her life growing up most likely was the reason she "wanted" to do these things, but in the end, we still have our own minds which we can discuss thoughts with no outside influence, and using our own conclusions, we decide to do an action or not. We weigh consequences vs. benefits, and at that time in her life, the benefits were more important.

Well fucking said.

Understand though, that most of the world won't openly share the opinions that we do on the internet. Most people will accept that her upbringing was the sole reason for her actions.

If this helps her get out of the mess, and gets people to calm down, then use it, and abuse it if needed. Exaggerate if you must.

People shouldn't be purposely looking to cause her grief and emotional pain, so anything that must be done, as long as it doesn't harm others, should be to end the situation asap.

Teenagers will be cruel, until they have a reason not to be.

If people start to feel sympathetic for the girl, then the people being cruel will look like assholes.

But keep an eye on her, and don't let her continue to abuse these excuses after this problem goes away. If she becomes dependant on it, it will only lead to bigger problems which become more difficult to solve.

This sentence right here is the entire problem.

For what should we blame her? Blame is for doing bad things.

She was doing what young people do. She didn't kill someone.

She fucked around, did some drugs, cut herself. I am not impressed.

I would fuck 100 chicks if the opportunity presented itself, and if they wanted me to smoke some pot or pop a pill in order to do it, you bet your ass I would.

And I grew up in an amazing household, poor maybe, and no father figure, but my mother was the bomb. I am responsible for every action I made/will make, and I don't see any problems with that girl that should have us "blaming" her.

QFT

Every man/woman is responsible for his/her own destiny

Shit. I read this thread.

yeah, she's "guilty." In that, she was responsible for her actions, but those actions weren't morally unsound. Mabye not the best for her in the long run, but she still isn't a bad person.