It seems to me in our society we don't hear much positive about having kids. Take the latest "omfg is my gf pregnant" thread, people are telling him to abort it and all the rest because it will fuck up his life. Or the recent hardley there and hoz bullshit, them whining about the work, the lack of sleep...

And really that's the impression people have created for me throughout my life. Children are nothing more than money drains that make your wife bloated and loose, that make you poor and stressed out, you'll never sleep, it's so hard, etc etc.

I find it somewhat disturbing that I've been conditioned and so many others have been conditioned to not want to do what were made to do; beget children. Sure I have this vague sense I want to spread my genes, and if I did get a woman pregnant I would want to keep it, even though I don't want to be a dad I wouldn't want my unborn child being killed.

Anyway, basically what I'm asking is; doesn't anyone have anything positive to say about having kids? I'm only hearing the bad stuff and the complaints. If you've had children, were they honestly worth it? Overall was it a positive thing or would you take it all back and be richer and more wellrested?

Having kids is great, if you are at the right age. The problem is the "right age" for sex and having kids seems to be askew. There is this girl I like right now, she is 23 and has a 3 year old. She loves her daughter, however she doesn't have money to move out, has to rely on her parents to babysit while she works, and all sorts of other issues that interfere with a normal 20 year old's social life. I'm also stuck on if I want to go out with her, it's more complicated then just "she has a kid," (so don't hold that against me) but that does play a rather large role.

Most people with kids around my age say the same thing, "I love my kid, and I'd still want to have him/her, but I wish I could have waited a few years"

I never said I regretted having kids.. I'm definitely not trying to give the impression that having children sucks.. It's having no help from your husband that sucks. Don't use me as an example if your going to use me inaccurately..

I can name a million reasons why having kids is an amazing experience.. I could write a book on it..There will never be anything in life more fulfilling than having your own children..

Its the difference between simply saying something in a "monkey see, monkey d" sort of way, and knowing why you say it.

The reason it is said is because the western culture is centered around skilled labor and a funny and inefficient education system. Once you get your certification to operate a microwave (GED) and other extremely basic machinery (high school diploma), you are supposed to either:

1) Get skills for good paying labor by sacrificing lots of time and money

2) Get a low-end job sacrificing little time and making almost no surplus money.

Its a matter of economics of WHY the system is set up this way. You then get people who simply say the same thing over and over about not having kids but keenly forgetting why its often a bad idea at such an early age. Thus, you have a generation of poeple loathing children.

Off topic:

GED is considered High School Diploma equivalent now..

AND Most high school students can't even pass the GED.. (somewhere around 72%ish.. can't remember the exact statistic so I won't quote and exact percentage.. Just know, that it's a lot of students!)

So let's upgrade that from microwave to stove top with oven?

Problem is that very very few people here will be allowed to be parents. My generation was the last who had that right.

Thanks to the Fem-Nazis any parent these days who tries to make decisions on behalf of or take responsibilty for their child will find themselves very quickly on the wrong side of the law.

I believe the situation in America is a little better but still going that way too.

I laugh when I read here that some of you say things like 'if I have a child I'll bring it up to do/think' this or that.

You deviate from what the state considers 'proper parenting' and your child will be taken from you.

I never said I regretted having kids.. I'm definitely not trying to give the impression that having children sucks.. It's having no help from your husband that sucks. Don't use me as an example if your going to use me inaccurately..

I didn't say that you said that, nor was I striving to imply it.

I can name a million reasons why having kids is an amazing experience.. I could write a book on it..There will never be anything in life more fulfilling than having your own children..

Go on...

It's an incredible feeling to see the product of your influences..

Yesterday my daughter got in trouble for not sharing her toy with my little brother.. (They are 8 months apart) I spanked her hand and told her, "Not nice, Riley! We share our toys!"

Today our cat was carrying around a very small stuffed unicorn that my daughter happened to be playing with first.. She shook her finger vigorously at the cat and said, "Nah nice, Ekohs! Sare!" Which equals, "Not nice, Freckles! Share!"

I loved this! My daughter remembers the things I say and applies them to the things she does.. I am a main influence in her life..
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We went to the playground last weekend and my daughter saw some wilted dandelions. She squealed and ran to them.
After tearing them from the ground she returned to me with dead dandelions clenched in her chubby fingers.. They were a present she picked out especially for me.

My daughter shows her gratitude for the things I do for her by showing me love..
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I was really depressed a few days ago.. I broke down and started crying on my kitchen floor.. Everyone was asleep, so I thought.. Suddenly, I felt wet sticky kisses on my arm.. My daughter came to comfort me..
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My son was screaming on the living room couch.. I was in the kitchen cleaning up.. He'd just been changed and had finished a feeding.. He was wrapped up and should've been asleep..

I let him cry a few minutes thinking he would go back to sleep.. He didn't.. I washed my hands and went to him.. All he wanted to be next to me.. As soon as I picked him up and laid him on my chest, he was instantly consoled..

I am a source of comfort for my children.
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The are worth every second of sleep I lose.. Every dime we no longer have.. Every stretchmark I bear on my body.. Every hair I pull out of my head..

My children give me a purpose in my life.. I am responsible for two pieces of the future.. It is up to me to give them the foundations to be successful, productive, influential members of society. And that is a huge burden on me, but at the same time an honor..

I have my own family.. I am no longer just a daughter and sister.. But I am a mother, a life-giver.. And that makes me feel like I'm not just taking up space in this world.. I am important because of my children. I am happy, because of my children. I am smarter, because of my children. I AM wiser, because of my children. I am different, because of my children.. I am loved because of my children..

It's been difficult, yes. If I had the chance to do it over, I would have chosen the same path. My life is better because I have children..

Ain't really much that could be added to that :)

Great post HT.

Ain't really much that could be added to that :)

Great post HT.

Believe me, I could go on and on.. :)

Anyway, basically what I'm asking is; doesn't anyone have anything positive to say about having kids?

I had a 2yo last night. She was pretty hawt.

...now that the obligatory trolling is, in fact, satisfied...

And really that's the impression people have created for me throughout my life. Children are nothing more than money drains that make your wife bloated and loose, that make you poor and stressed out, you'll never sleep, it's so hard, etc etc.

That's because we have created a society in which children are nothing more than mone/time/sleep/energy drains.

This is not inherent in society, by any means. Go ahead. Get together with the surrounding five blocks to take turns feeding the area's children for that day. Suddenly, you'll be buying a whopping five pound bag of potatoes, with a little beans and rice, about twice a year. Better still, you'll have a sense of community, the kids will babysit each other... everything's perfect!

Somewhere, in a playground near you, there's a very creepy man in a trenchcoat who would gladly buy formula or diapers for any kid that needs it, even the many they don't even know and never will, without asking anything in return. God put these freaks there for a reason, use it. They are, in fact, most of the world. Free babysitting, too.

Currently, most of any paycheck we get goes towards abject slavery. Serfdom. The guv'mnt controls the land, and if you aqquire some woods somewhere, drop out of the system and live off the land, the government will come along and say "Hey... you... get off your ass and work, every day, for about 2/3rds of a year... not to get anything for yourself, but just to be a slave. Bitch." Most of our income isn't spent on the difficulties of aqquiring a cup of rice, it's on a place to stay. Land.

Get together with random people. Quit isolating yourselves, and 'ZOMG MY FAMILY HAS NO MUNEEE' will stop being a panicked paranoia. Your commune will have the rent of one against the income of legion, and a nice little courtyard in the center.

Ever notice how pretty much all this shit comes down to "quit isolating and segregating yourselves?" Yeah. Kids "don't mix" with adults (including their own parents, who quite often DON'T hang with their kids) ... so, they end up unsocialized little nutcases, which makes interacting with them (or anyone) harder. People isolate from their neighbors, their communities, everyone, which puts an undue burden on time and money which, frankly, isn't natural...

I agree. The space our society has hell-driven towards is... fucked up. It must, in fact, suck to lock one's self in one's basement, hate one's kids, and always be broke... but to fix, say, the "hating one's kids" part, one has to build a society which even allows the option of not hating one's kids. Hell... I love the shit out of children, in ways which are felonious in most states... but if someone came up and said "support these nine kids by tomorrow," it would be rather a strain on my time and ability.

It would not be a strain - and for me, a joy - to do so in a tribal society.

...which leaves me with a final irony. To build a world which doesn't hate kids, one must build a more humane and rational world... yet, conversely, those most equipped to build a better society are those who didn't spend their childhood being hated.

Sorta the downward spiral of the month, ain't it?

Believe me, I could go on and on.. :)

I know :)

Infact I'm going to add one fo my own (from a male/father perspective):

Last year i had a run in with a policeman, a peeler as we call them. I questioned his actions,firmly BUT civilly, and he went ape-shit! I was slack jawed at the level of hate and potential violence in his voice and his threats. I still have trouble believing he had ever passed any form of psychological evaluation before joining the force.

Now remember i was raised to believe that british policemen are untouchable and should never be attacked as they are unarmed. Like most Brits my age I have trouble taking any armed police officer seriously, there's always a feeling he thinks his gun gives him authority. Remember also i have convictions for attacking armed foreign police officers and for knifing people.

This particular officer was so aggressive that my hand was on my knife in my pocket.

10-15 years ago I would have knifed him on principle, in a heartbeat and it really took all my self control not to.

The only thing that stayed my hand was the thought of my kids and my responsibilites towards them. What I had already given up to keep them safe. All the things I've had to do to make sure they got a chance to grow up.

Killing a peeler means a life on the run forever, there's nowhere you can hide because policemen everywhere have a form of 'brotherhood'.

So yes having kids has made me a better person.

Having kids is really great. Just yesterday my daughter brought me a picture she drew of us (Me and her) together with a title that read, "I love mom."

Whenever I get sad, she startes singing to me.

Everytime she goes outside, she brings me a flower or a pretty rock or anything she thinks is cool.

When she was a baby, if I felt sad I could just pick her up and feel happy.

She's so uncomplicated...The smallest things make her smile and laugh.

LOL *tries to imagine his sons doing the same when they were small and not the size of cart horses on steriods*

"'ere Dadda LOOK at da Puurdy Rock I's founded"

Here my kids when they were small and cute

http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b116/horta/familywkwald-1.jpg

Prussian genes FTW!

It's an incredible feeling to see the product of your influences..

Thanks alot for those stories, they were helpful.

And jackketch....uh...I mean it's great that your kids stop you killing people and all, but uh, I don't really have that problem (though it comes close to that when people block up the aisles with shopping trolleys )

(though it comes close to that when people block up the aisles with shopping trolleys )

Well gunning down such people should only be a misdemeanour anyway..you know? Like hunting without a licence or wearing flared trousers.

To create life is to create death.

You think it's a fun world you live in? As long as you can look at the fun side, but there are 2 sides, always have been, always will be. YOU decide if you want to raise a child in this shit. Im keeping my kid out of this hellhole, for that I think I'm a pretty good dad.

Never have to take a shit, never have to work a shitty job, sit in a shitty school, never get sick, bitten by a bug, never get beat up, never have a broken heart. Really, there is so much good in this world, but there is a lot of pain. Ever say to yourself when you're so hurt "man, I wish I just didnt exist". But then you struggled, became stronger, overcame the pain. Im gonna save my kid the trip ;) No existence= no birth; no death; no suffering; no change.

Having kids is really great. Just yesterday my daughter brought me a picture she drew of us (Me and her) together with a title that read, "I love mom."

Whenever I get sad, she startes singing to me.

Everytime she goes outside, she brings me a flower or a pretty rock or anything she thinks is cool.

When she was a baby, if I felt sad I could just pick her up and feel happy.

She's so uncomplicated...The smallest things make her smile and laugh.


This is what I can't understand, how some people get so happy over something that is ending. This world is dying, we always think death is far off in the future, and we hear about "someone else" getting kidnapped and beaten to death, and people long to look pretty, look young, look alive. Have fun, chase dreams, avoid death in every way.... Build jobs, secure our kids, secure our homes. But wait, KIDS? So now even though you know youre going to die youre going to bring someone else into the party to die as well? It's futile, there is only one destiny for this body: 6 feet under, or maybe not even, maybe in a river, in someone's basement, maybe tripped and fallen upon a blade where no one finds it for years or bugs eat it.

When people get older they become even more bitter as death is approaching. They get "lonely" then they create another person to die. They seek something else, even a human life, to keep them company. Would I give this life as a gift to someone? The minute you are born a thousand burdens come your way. It is imprisonment. I just don't get it. Maybe it's that people who have kids haven't seen as much painful things as I have, but in this world everything is dying the minute it is born, every experience that begins is only going to end. Nothing really makes me happy or sad anymore, if you think Im fucked up for it, so be it. Won't really matter one day. Every parent is so happy with their kids, but I hope they can be as happy when their kid dies and they die, because as much as we hate to think about it and run away from it, shit, maybe that's the real source of our problems: being unable to cope with the painful reality and fact that everything that exists is ending.

I'm definitely secure in my decision to never have kids

To create life is to create death.

You think it's a fun world you live in? As long as you can look at the fun side, but there are 2 sides, always have been, always will be. YOU decide if you want to raise a child in this shit. Im keeping my kid out of this hellhole, for that I think I'm a pretty good dad.

Never have to take a shit, never have to work a shitty job, sit in a shitty school, never get sick, bitten by a bug, never get beat up, never have a broken heart. Really, there is so much good in this world, but there is a lot of pain. Ever say to yourself when you're so hurt "man, I wish I just didnt exist". But then you struggled, became stronger, overcame the pain. Im gonna save my kid the trip ;) No existence= no birth; no death; no suffering; no change.

Or maybe, you can have the power to raise your children to make a difference in the world so that it wouldn't be such a 'hellhole'?

All of those things are what make us human.. They make us stronger and wiser.. They are the life experiences that are essential in the fabrication of what makes us who we are.. Sure they are uncomfortable, even painful at times.. But pain is only temporary.. They will have happy times when they say, "I want to live forever!" or something to that extent..

I don't know...I post a pic of my three adorable kids (back when they were adorable) and I don't get a single 'awwwwwww'???!!!

Not even from oc6??!

I definitely found them to be adorable.. :) don't worry.. I was getting to it..

Definitely the 80's/early 90's

When I see a kid I just see another dumbass to hustle in a couple years. The world's over populated anyways.


If I got a girl pregnant and she was steadfast in her will to keep my spawn I'd definately go on a bender because there's no way to raise a kid right morally and financially. Everybody I know whose had a kid deals drugs or has had to subject them to something bad. Suppose it'll toughen the kid up.


I'd be one of those fathers that go out for a "pack of smokes" and never return.

I think kids are great. They have such energy and excitement, there's so much for them to see and experience. :)

I'd only have one with a woman with which I felt confidence; confidence that she would be a good mother, a warm mother.

Your kids all look alike! And they are very cute...It's sad to think of them all grown up now.:( It reminds me that someday my daughter will be all grown up and not cute and small anymore.

So do your kids look more like you or more like their mom?

Oh, what do the three of them look like now?

Oh, what do the three of them look like now?

The one on the left with his hand raised like a boxer, is the eldest. He's now a 18 year 5' 8" old black haired emo mall gothy sk8terboi with enough metal in his face to trigger airport security

The one at the back is the youngest. He's now 16 and so large that he jobs as a solar eclipse. He passed my height and width this year. He's also about 2 stone overweight. He takes after the men of my line, not so gentle giants. Although he has somehow acquired my father-in-laws curly hair which none of my line have.

The one in the wheelchair is the 17 year old middle son. He's still in the wheelchair of course and has an upper body to rival a pro body builder. He has lost all his 'melt hearts angelicness' and now just manages to look like a skag rat who spends 12 hours a day on his laptop.

I think your youngest one looks like his mom.

HUH???!

A body building skag addict, that's an impressive description. But, shouldn't he look like one or the other?

If skag addicts were body builders...

I meant simply he manages to look like a skag rat...no matter how much he washes, shaves and pops zits...just somehow 'skanky'.

who spends 12 hours a day on his laptop.

An interesting thought! I wonder if any of your offsping have discovered totse and the true identity of its moderating hangman?

I sense a sudden increase in pocket money coming your way (thats allowance to the yankies out there) :)

An interesting thought! I wonder if any of your offsping have discovered totse and the true identity of its moderating hangman?

I sense a sudden increase in pocket money coming your way (thats allowance to the yankies out there) :)

C:\Windows\System32\Drivers\etc\hosts
127.0.0.1 localhost
127.0.0.1 www.totse.com

and he has a basic allowance of £100/$200 a month and up to £200/$400 if needs must. So he can forget anymore.

C:\Windows\System32\Drivers\etc\hosts
127.0.0.1 localhost
127.0.0.1 www.totse.com

and he has a basic allowance of £100/$200 a month and up to £200/$400 if needs must. So he can forget anymore.

Yes ok! but considering some of the things you admit/pertain to in this BBS, does it not concern you that your kids and your kids friends etc may be here right now!

Yes ok! but considering some of the things you admit/pertain to in this BBS, does it not concern you that your kids and your kids friends etc may be here right now!

Simple answer = yes .

^^^^^

*Shudders at the thought*

As I think you said in a previous thread, we think we are safe and anonymous in here but we are forever throwing out bytes of information that could identify who we really are........

Sorry didn't mean to hijack the thread.

HUH???!
He's the really blonde one behind the wheelchair, right? You posted a picture of your wife one time and I think he looks like her. I can't tell with the other two.

He's the really blonde one behind the wheelchair, right? You posted a picture of your wife one time and I think he looks like her. I can't tell with the other two.

I want to see this wife picture.. It would be easier to see who looks like whom.. :)

I want to see this wife picture.. It would be easier to see who looks like whom.. :)



Just after that pic was taken she went down from a size 16 to a 10 (thats 14 to an 8 US). Her face was very round there. But its a good pic to compare with the kids faces.

And yes I had hair.....

And yes we were some kind of mennonites.

Ha its the guy from the Partridge family.....Uber cool!

Jack, it musta been hella hard to raise them all with such small age gaps in between (they're now all mid to late teens, right?), seeing as they would have all been wailing toddlers around the same age.
Unless your children were particularly well mannered!
Sweet photos, you look like a happy family. :)

Oh, and to contribute to this thread, my parents went all out, and home educated us three kids.
My parents put a lot of effort in, and I'd say I have a well-rounded basic education, I'm not at college.
I'd like to have kids myself.. when I have the means to raise a child well, I shall.

Jack, it musta been hella hard to raise them all with such small age gaps in between (they're now all mid to late teens, right?), seeing as they would have all been wailing toddlers around the same age.
ll.

Uhm yes it had its 'moments', especially as I was a single parent most of the time.

About that time she started seeing the Angel Of Death and various other fun stuff.

I still think the youngest looks like her. The oldest and middle ones look like both of you.

I don't think she looks fat in that picture, BTW.

And were you actually mennonites?

Its really difficult describing the "feeling" of raising kids, because unless you've experienced it is almost impossible to describe. It would be like someone that has never had a drop of alcohol ask...."what does it feel like to be drunk". The only way I can begin to elaborate what its like having kids is by simply saying its the highest of the highs, and the lowest of the lows. You'll get such enjoyment and pride from the silliest things.......the first time they smile at you, first time they say your name, the way they run to you when you first walk in the door, seeing their amazement opening gifts during Christmas and Birthdays. These are all emotions that are nothing short of astounding to feel, and you look back and wonder how did you ever "live" a fulfilled life before you had kids. The whole notion of NOT having children in your life is totally incomprehensible, even if you had a very happy life before they were born.

The flip side is though, you are opening yourself to a whole new set of stresses, frustration and disappointment. Right now my wife and I are dealing with a 4 year old going through an amazingly difficult phase just being defiant and getting into all kinds of mischief. Testing his limits I suppose. Ya wanna know how my morning started? Most mornings if he wakes up before me, he usually turns on the TV or plays....and wakes me when he is hungry or needs something to drink. Today I get up with the declaration of....."daddy, come check it out, I cut the kitties with a scissors". Sure enough, the 2 kittens we just got 2 weeks ago had some hair missing and globs of it were all over the house. I then find his chocolate milk mix all over the kitchen counter, and amazingly enough most of the mix found its way to the living room all around/on top of my surround sound system's sub-woofer. (Needless to say I'm more pissed about him possibly fucking up my surround sound, than giving the cats a little trimming). Oh, and he took it upon himself to make himself breakfast that consisted of Pop Tarts and a huge plate of Cheese Curls! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Yes, THIS is how my morning started!!!! : (

One other thing I'd like to add to this great topic is the way our culture seems to be so insistent in the mantra of "raise them, now boot them out". For some reason society now dictates that when people grow up into their 20's they have to move out or be deemed a "loser" still living with Mommy and Daddy. The parents are looked at as failing, and the kids are judged also because they are still living at home. Why is that? It wasn't always that way, and if you look back in history many households had sometimes 3 and 4 generations living comfortably under one roof. Maybe its just selfishness, or over controlling parents, or just a plain old lack of compromise.....but it seems both sides of the equation just can't wait till the younger set move on in today's day and age. I find it very weird how society seems to say we are supposed to love/nurture our kids for 20+ years, but god forbid should they still be under your roof any time after that. Think about how many bad decisions and life altering choices people in their late teens and early 20's make, all in the quest of "escaping" their family. And how many old folks are living alone in nursing homes because of this "isolation" mindset. It appears society has "evolved" to a point where having attachment and devotion to your family is more of a fault/weakness, moreso than an admirable trait.

Personally, I want children. I would love it if I had one now (24 years old, for reference). Then again, I kind of think I am in the wrong time period. My values and beliefs are much different than the general consensus, and I'm glad for that. Family is really important to me, and I really don't see a point in life if you're not going to have children.

But that's just me.