everything was fine just a few days ago. shit was running fairly smoothly. we had our problems, but nothing too major. nothing so god damn emotionally crippling.

then i said something, in a moment of not thinking about what i was saying clearly enough, that she got seriously offended about. i don't even think it was all that bad, honestly. for the rest of the day she would not even look at me. i'd sit right next to her and apologize and ask her to just acknowledge me, and she'd put her head down and ignore me. i called her after school, after she hadn't seen me for a few hours, figured things cooled down by then, but no, she wouldn't even listen to me. she put the phone down and walked away, left me to talk to myself.

next day, didn't say anything to me. didn't look at me. called me later that night to tell me she didn't want to resolve this. wanted to end our friendship. started talking about how much of an asshole i am, how this is becoming a habit and i'm not considerate of her feelings. i'm completely lost and am wondering what fucking bizarro universe i woke up in today.

she calls me again later that night. starts off by saying sorry. i'm starting to think she's calmed down, and everythings all right. nah, shes just sorry for blowing up about this one incident, but in reality it's because she's been looking for an excuse to get out. she likes me, she says, she likes hanging out with me as much as she does. usually shes the one to initiate plans. but she doesn't like not having as many friends as she used to or some shit. doesn't like the fact we're both going to the same college in the fall and she'll feel "restricted." to me, that means she won't be able to go out, mess around with any guy she wants guilt free and shit. she'll have to worry about my feelings. such a fucking burden.

i do everything for this girl, let me tell you. and it's not like there wasn't anything she wouldn't do for me either, which just makes all this shit such a fucked up surprise. we aren't even dating, mind you. we're best friends, with benefits, and maybe that wasn't the best idea to start up, but it worked so well. i felt good around her. i wanted nothing but to make her feel good. what do i get? shit thrown in my face.

so now it's coming up on the last week of school and i want nothing to do with the whole place. my other friends offer little sympathy and i really don't know what i want right now. even ideally, i wouldn't want to leave town, i wouldn't want to turn back time because this shit would just happen eventually anyway. there doesn't seem to be any good solution.

i don't even know why i'm typing this, honestly. in a way i'm asking for advice, but i know there isn't any. "just get through it." i don't want to get through it. the quality of my life has gone down so much in just the last few days. it's fucking ridiculous. if shit had been like this for the past year, if i didn't have her, i don't know where i'd be now. i'd be a fucking hermit, just like i'm going to become in the coming months. then there's college. i didn't go to school today and i don't want to go tomorrow, but fuck if there still aint another god damn 4 days after that.

what did you say to her?

Yeah man, WTF did you say?

well that takes some explaining.

we're both pretty smart. at the top of our class, but she's got a few more decimal points on the GPA, so she's going to be valedictorian. honestly, i've never cared much about class rank. i know i'm smart, i don't need to be honored with a title like that, and furthermore, i know it's only based off of GPA, and if you really want to be valedictorian, all you have to do is take as many honors classes as you can and get A's. our school is not very challenging. some classes are hard, but others, the teachers don't give a shit.

now then. a kid in our class had said something to her like "whocares123 is better than you because blah blah" and she came back with "well then i'd just bring up the fact that i have a higher GPA than him." at this point, it all sounds like kidding. god damn kidding. wasting time in class. not really saying anything of importance.

so i go along with it and say "yeah but then i'd just say i have a higher ACT score than you." (the one god damn thing i have ever done that was better than her, whoopty doo. 2 point difference).

at this, she got kind of upset. but it still kind of seemed like she was kidding around, i wasnt sure.

so she says something like "you gonna stop saying things like that?" and i say "yeah, sure. sorry, but you started it."

so then somehow, i dont remember how, i said "you're only valedictorian because you took a couple more honors classes than i did." and that's when she put her head down and wouldn't look at me.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

sounds very....not important, doesn't it? i feel like a nerd just typing all that, honestly. i dislike school, i only do good in it because i have aspirations and a work ethic. all i was trying to say to her is yeah, if they based class rank on amount of effort put in, then you'd get it. she goes above and beyond expectations. a real over achiever. i do enough to get an A and i see no point in going beyond that because fuck school. but i was trying to say that's not how they pick valedictorian. it's just whoever looks smart on paper, that doesn't always mean the person is actually the best in class. she said i was "undermining her accomplishment." i was pissed that she seemed to be boasting to me, and that she got upset because i mentioned the fucking ACT. i don't brag about shit and i've never wanted to be the best in anything because of all the attention you get and the jealousy. this just proves that and will further discourage me from reaching my potential in the future. but can i get mad at her about that? oh of course not. i'm the asshole.

now you must keep in mind what she said to me in the 2nd phone call, when she said she was just looking for an excuse to end our close friendship, and it wasn't really THAT big of a deal. but she still told me that i showed her some negative side of me she didn't know was there before, and accused me of being inconsiderate of her feelings.

the suddenness and seemingly lack of a reason behind it is killing me.

wow she is way over reacting. she is pissed at you because she is overprideful about her grades. Yeah, they are important. But she was over reacting majorly.

i didn't go to school today, and one of my friends said something to her, jokingly, "hey look, whocares123 isn't here today. you made him kill himself, haha," to which she responded, "good. i hope he killed himself, because he killed me with his comments."

i mean, we've had a couple tiffs over the year or so i've been friends with her, and some shit that didn't really seem rational to me, but she'd always get over it within a day or two. the last shit that went down was on a seemingly normal day, we were supposed to hang out, and i called her at the time i was supposed to and everything, but got no answer. so i tried again in a few minutes, and then again in a few more minutes. i originally called at 6, and kept trying at 15-20 minute intervals until about 8:00, when there was still no answer. so i figured something important must've came up, she's not home, and she'll call me back whenever she gets home to explain.

but then what ended up happening was her completely ignoring me the next day at school, me being like wtf is going on, and getting a call from her the following evening saying how upset she was that i didn't call. i said i did call, multiple times, but she said she had no way of knowing that because i didn't leave a message, which is true, but she was the one that wasn't home at the time we agreed to get together and she's the one that didn't call me to tell me she would have to leave to go do something, as was the case. and we were only going to hangout to do homework or some shit that we do nearly every day anyway. it wasn't some big planned out event.

sigh, maybe this is a habit on her end. i lose respect for her each time something like this happens, which just depresses me because of how great a person she is, and how great we get along, outside of shit like this.

You know, I exploded in a similar way. Perhaps different people value different things differently? Some people invest themelves in academics and success, some people in love. I suppose, then, perhaps you're just different? Or maybe something in the way or specific words you said it in hit a nerve? Sometimes you never know what will just be the right word combination to set someone off. Sometimes, the people who seem most close together are just the closest to the edge.

Ok I'm not quite sure: girlfriend or friend?

technically, friend. but we're together a lot and all...and are regularly "intimate." neither of us do that with other people. meh.

i just don't see why this has to be permanent. i can understand being mad temporarily, but..

Tell her to stop being such a god damn pussy?

You sure you wanna mend this friendship?

But stop apologizing, if youre acting as if you are the guilty one, then you are the guilty one.
She is the one who should be apologizing, when you get a chance, tell her what youve told us; that shes way overreacting and basically crazy in the head. (or something, leave the crazy part)