Please be vivid.

I don't get rid of hardons, but I once had a smile on my face that I couldn't get rid of due to a girl. I asked her out and had no idea how she felt, which is rare; I was overjoyed and just couldn't get rid of a goofy grin.

I asked HB to find me the most disturbing and graphic pictures they could locate. It took care of things. Quickly.

Maths.

There was a clip from Family Guy where Quagmire thinks of Renee Zellweger to get rid of his boner.

i cant really think ofmuch. even like thinking of ugly chicks will keep it up because it is sexually related and i just wind up replacing the faces with hot ones. For example (your mom and shaq)

dont get rid of it. show it off. i do the same with morning wood. i dont care whos around either.

cross your legs, with a little of your dick tucked in.

i like to think about guns, that always helps

Maths.

Either that, or I run through the IP addressing scheme at work in my head. IP's, subnets, DNS servers, DHCP ranges, Routers, routes between routers.

Given 60 seconds of that, my mind is clear of any other thoughts, and I have one of those Zen moments. Oh, and the hard on? gone....

^ speak for yourself.. routers turn me on. especially the wireless kind ^__^

I usually think about anything besides sex, but then the thoughts just start coming more and more. So really, I just wait it out.

Your mom. Coz shes a fat slag.

Power Rangers

No, really.

This one time I was having sex with my girlfriend (at the time) and it got all intimate so she was like:

"What are you thinking?"

Expecting me to say something intimate or affection like "How much I love you."

But all I said was "Power Rangers."

The look she gave is one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

I go over the entire roster of my football team. I then go over heights, weights and max lifts. If that doesn't work for you, at least you learned something about yourself.

Google image "Ascaris"

Who wants Ramen noodles?

I think of a pale full moon, with a wisp of clouds drifting across it. It works every time.

lol - I currently have a couple of Cisco 7600's on my desk. I don't know that I'd say I was hard over them, but I am pretty excited......

I find the addressing schemes a huge turnoff, thats all.....

^hot

but im into the petites a little myself.
is it wrong to have porn stored on my wrt54gs's?

I figure if it has the capability to store porn, and porn isn't stored there, it is a waste of storage.

So no - it's not wrong.....

excellent ^_^

*fap fap fap*

MENTAL NOTE:

Never buy a used router from this man.

I don't seem to have that power to be able to think of something else and get rid of it. I just kinda wait it out until it goes down. Oh sure, things turn me on, just..either i'm content after fapping or just waiting it out, thats how It works..

Get rid of them? Why on Earth would you do that?

It so much fun walking around with a boner...Especially when chicks notice and go red.

haha
walk around with a massive grin on your face and go up to random people, introduce yourself etc.

personally, i tune out

I think about my painball gun, imagining shooting things.

I think of my mom's friends bent over doggy style and being forced to stick it in their butt's by gunpoint.

Never fails.

I think of something totally random, say, a fire engine

..then I think of the hose and how it might resemble a penis, then how it sprays everywhere and then I get a gay fireman fetish in my minds eye where they are using cum to put out the fire..

sure, it gets rid of the boner, but shit, it makes me lose touch with reality for a while and look like I have that "duh" expression on my face.

This goes for anything. I guess it's like rule 34.

sure, it gets rid of the boner, but shit, it makes me lose touch with reality for a while and look like I have that "duh" expression on my face.

I'm constantly doing that kinda shit, not because I have a hard on, I'm just a sick evil fuck.

I don't usually need to get rid of them, but when i must, i either imagine my cock's a tightly wound cable and visualize it unwinding, or think of slicing cucumbers very finely.

i think about that program on penis enlargement surgery that was on tv once

basically they sliced open this guys cock, stuffed it with silicone and stiched it back up again

Rats/Danny Devito

Finally, somebody else who agrees. Having a boner is great fun.

I beat the blood out of the little bastard. Or I display it for any nearby women...it doesn't really work as a pick-up, but it's fun as hell.

Same

And I think about some nasty skin disease from rotten.

I just think about how if the girls around see it they will think Im a weirdo perv and never talk to me again. If the guys see it they will think Im a Faagot.

Works every time.

black chicks

I think about math, and it really works. EX:

13x45=585
67+76=143
48x31=1488

Anyone reading this who had a boner no longer has it. Guaranteed.

usually math. like if it's getting too good with a gf, i'd think "0+5=5, 5+5=10, 10+5=15, 15+5=20..." it dosent sound like much thought, but it isn't a simple pattern, so it takes some thought when in the moment.

It's not a simple pattern?! You're adding five every time. Are you shitting me?

If I wanted to think of some math to distract me(not too easy but not too hard) I would probably go with prime factorization of numbers above 100. One that I actually do though, is try and figure out the values of square roots to the nearest tenth place. For example, 30 is about 5.5 squared. Start out with easy ones like root 2 and go from there.

If I wanted to think of some math to distract me(not too easy but not too hard) I would probably go with prime factorization of numbers above 100. One that I actually do though, is try and figure out the values of square roots to the nearest tenth place. For example, 30 is about 5.5 squared. Start out with easy ones like root 2 and go from there.

I think someones showing off their math e-boner right about now......

I'm having problems getting it up... never mind down.

what do i do....

usually, i keep telling myself "stop thinking whatever your thinking" for about a minute or so. then the hardon goes bye bye. heh. my dick is at my command.

yea, just as math it's east, but thinking out the words "zero plus five is five. plus five is 10. plus five is 15.." whatever, it works.

haha yeh a goofy grin can be equal to a boner in terms of embarassing.

I imagine a balloon deflating, over and over. And I HAVE to do the little pinch with my fingers. Start big and slowly pinch until my fingers are touching.

*eep*

Uggh...

Chairs.

A cookie for whoever gets the reference. :)

Or the Fibonacci sequence.

"I am Polaris" over and over again until it goes away

Either that, or I run through the IP addressing scheme at work in my head. IP's, subnets, DNS servers, DHCP ranges, Routers, routes between routers.


^Keeping your mind busy is a lot more effective than trying to gross yourself out, etc.

I've found myself calculating subnets, IP's, etc before. (bloody Cisco)

Take DXM you wont get a boner until your done tripping.

That works. Best cure for it here, I guarantee.

Lemonparty and goatse man. i dont look at them, simply thinking about it is enough to make me hurl. a lot. This usually doesn't end well when im trying to get ride of a boner in class.

Not true, i once whacked it for like fuckin 30 minutes on DXM (i was on weed too though, i love that combo). difference is, it makes it damn near impossible to orgasm. i just gave up eventually.

LOL I am still laughing! I feel kind of odd that I am but hey, why not?

Note: It's really gross, so you've been warned.

Fibonacci sequence ftw. Or exponential growth of two. 2^1, 2^2, 2^3, etc. Works like a charm.

Just think about fighting.