so a friend I've known for about 4 months has asked me out on a date. she's really cool, funny, and all that. however she's a bit overweight, now I'm not that shallow guy that looks only at that.

all the time we've spent together has been fun, sometimes she's depressed and i help cheer her up, I'm just that kind of guy. problem is i like her as a friend and just that.

i really haven't felt any connection that would indicate potential relationship so far, but i didn't have the heart to decline so we're heading out in a couple days.

i plan to have a fun evening regardless of my feelings and i hope she has a fun time too. only thing is i need some help as how to break the news to her, seeing as I've never had to do this to an established friend.

so my request totse, is some tips on how to let her off easily, i'd like to avoid the famous cliche of " i think we'd be better off as friends" or " i like you just as a friend"

it may seem pathetic but, i would appreciate any POSITIVE input guys, thanks.

first off you fucked up by telling her you would go on the date with her, thats giving her false hopes right there, now its going to be twice as awkward

thats partially what i was thinking, I'm hoping that it later doesn't seem that I was leading her on by doing this, I'm just hoping she can see that we can have a great time being friends.

How overweight is she? Like Fatzilla or just a cute chubby?

Pics?

she's put on some since this pic, kinda hard to tell though, from this one, but like I said, it's not my main concern, I haven't really felt that connection yet.

http://img300.imageshack.us/img300/8171/toriem9.jpg

Well... You can either make an excuse "...I like someone else" (works for me, because it's usualy tue).

Or,

You can just tell her the truth, tell her you'd rather not jeopordize your current friendship, then explaining all the horror stories you heard on &Totse about friends dating.

Either way... Honesty is always a winner (in my opinion... with friends anyway)

I'd listen to the kitty^^ Seems like a good plan. By the pic, she doesn't look that bad. That's coming from a Totsean of course.

You can't let her off easy, she'll drop like the ton of blubber she is.

Ok, but really, that's a pretty awkard and lose-lose situation. Find something like 'I like someone else' or that you're not looking for anyone at the time or like that that will crush her less.

thanks guys, I'm probably going to go with not wanting someone right now, and that whole route. thanks for the help guys. and no she doesn't look that bad either.

You could go to her before the date and say, "Hey, there's actually something I need to talk to you about... I'm sorry if I gave the wrong impression, I didn't want to lead you on or anything, but I'm actually not really interested/I think we'd be better as friends/I'm not looking for somebody right now/I like somebody else. But I'd still like to spend time with you as a friend and we can keep our date."

Or something along those lines. It'll be less awkward if you do it before you go on a date with her, and then you'll have a better time when you're out with her since you won't have it hanging over your head. And she'll STILL get to see that you can have a great time as just friends.