I've been cutting off contact with my friends for nine months. I get a couple calls now and then, but I just tell them I'm busy.

Somehow I saw a girl I knew in my dream, and she's been on my mind since. I need to ask her out and make it last good. She's got some friends who used to be old buddies of mine.

I'm concerned that she'll think I'm a hermit freak once she finds out all I do is stay home. I can take her out on infinite dates, but the lack of my social life still concerns me.

Comments, inputs.

If ot bothers you then do something about it.

Get a ewe. As long as they're fed?

They don't care what you do. Of course, you're not likely to dream of ewes & if you do? Yer prob a bloke with a twisted melon.

Are you busy or do you just need new friends?

I'm comfortable without friends.

More comfortable.

You just need to learn to work the angles. I suggest acting more broody and anti-social, if you do it right you come off more bad boy then hermit.

Also make sure she always knows that it’s entirely your choice that you don’t hang out with other people much. Never make her think you just don’t have any other option.

Almost impossible...
I stopped hanging with all of the people i used too about 3 weeks ago b/c they were'nt REALLY my friends (I have NEVER had a real friend, maybe in the 5th or 6th grade, idk). I've never had a girlfriend either (YEAH MY LIFES PRETTY FUCKIN SHITTY). Suicide is always an option, i've thought about it too often. The drugs do help but now i might have to quit!

So what makes you think you'll like having a girlfriend?

I agree. You seem to have some kind of anti social disorder if you're comfier WITHOUT friends. So indeed, why are you so convinced that you'll be more comfy with a girlfriend?

I mean friends are friends because you don't have them there all the time but they're still around when you need/want them. A girlfriend will be with you the majority of your time so how do you work out you want to be with her? I suspect your brain is in your trousers on this one dear boy.

Its very difficult. But fuck girls for a minute, if you dont have a social life...thats a critical problem in your life. You can rationalize it all you want, but its not healthy to isolate yourself from other people. Its an area you need to work on. Self improvement always comes before girls. You'll never have a meaningful relationship until you deal with your own issues. And besides, its way too easy to hide these critical character flaws long enough for one night stands in the mean time.

OP, he's right. Not having friends could be an anti-social disorder, or maybe you have a fear of rejection. I don't know your personal situation, but that's the place to start.
You know what happens when people isolate themselves from the rest of humanity? They go fucking crazy. People need companionship, we weren't meant to be alone.
It sounds like your friends still want to hang out, which is a good thing, because you don't have to go looking for friends. Next time your friends call you, hang out with them. Hell, you might even meet some girl and start dating. You have to start somewhere man.

My understanding is that neither boys nor girls are too fond of someone who gets ALL their social interaction from them? People's psyche isn't built that way.

So...you break up with her....

Are you the kind to take it cooly or will you threaten to off yerself to keep her? How stable are you?

why doy ou not want to go out or have friends, but do want a girlfriend?

I too prefer my own company and would rather just stay home. Every friend I've ever had has always been a back stabbing double crossing fuck. So now I generally don't like people.

So maybe I'm anti-social, so what?

I don't think he realises that girlfriends aren't just for 'thexthhh'

I don't think he realises that girlfriends aren't just for 'thexthhh'

"Thexxthhh" .

What? Girls are not just a place to put it? "Now, get in the kitchen & make me a sammich. Then get back in there a-cookin' & a-cleanin'!"

You mean they are also for the cookin'/sammiches etc.? Nothin' wrong with lettin' the women spend all their non-bed-time in the kitchie, as why not let them do what they like? Why try to keep them out of the place where they are happy?

Somehow I saw a girl I knew in my dream, and she's been on my mind since.

I hate that shit. Like someone took a hammer to your brain and left it ringing like a bell.

OP is in same situation as me

..i left college, now I have 6 months of doing..nothing

I hate my 'friends' and have just come off an ddiction to Valium + other tranquilizers, so I am really fucking paranoid and twitchy

oh well, my time will come

Haha, I had the same thing with valiums.

Anyway, I didn't think it was this bad. Have I got no way?

I can get my friends back anytime, I just don't want to. Everyone in the school knows that.

Wha'? It's a HS-click you're in? You've got to hang in a group standin' around all cool or nothin'? Well...it is school & not much like real life.

It's true that complete isolation does send you pretty fucking nuts. You lose all your inhibitions and generally have to start all over again. I would suggest keeping some contact with your freinds, not a lot, but enough to remind you what other people are like. With the girl then go for the strong silent type and try not to be obsessive. Chicks don't dig that.

My only concern is what to do when I get a girlfriend.

I understand that I'll be hanging out with her a lot, probably her friends as well. What do I do about my side of social life that I introduce to her?

Just make it seem like you have one friend, your best friend, who you hang out with exclusively. Then she won't think that the only social interaction you get is from her.