Yeah you heard me. I don't know if this belongs here but the other day, my mom tells me I should think about how many conversations I have with the people in this house.

I have a girlfriend and I'm at her place a lot of the time. When I'm at home I basically just sit in my room, by the computer. My mom thinks I don't talk with my parents/siblings enough.

I told her we're family damnit, family isn't supposed to talk, what would we ever talk about? She's like 50 or whatever, I'm 20, what are we supposed to have in common?


So I'm just wondering what kinda relationships you guys have with your families, if this is normal or not...

I have absolutely nothing in common with my sister. We barely talk. I haven't really talked to my brother in two, three years and we've never, ever talked about personal things. My dad is a complete asshole (he once kicked a hole in a door just because someone left the hall light on while he was sleeping), so we never talk either. As for my mother, we do talk, but only when I start the conversations, and it's never about anything really that personal. I also don't feel comfortable enough with my mother to let her know much personal about me, plus all of my family are out most of the day, so I'm alone a lot... so yeah, you're not the only one who doesn't have a relationship with your family.

Yeah when it comes to real personal conversations, I only kinda have them with my 24 year old brother, cos we're not that different but he doesn't live here anymore so... I'm not sure what my role is in the house, I'm just the geek who fixes the computers when they break :/

mostly the same here

i don't talk to my parents or my brothers any more

which is weird because im very close to my sister

but that's probably because like me she's the deviant type

I just wonder if the "(nonsexual)" part of your title was absolutely necessary....

I consider my mom one of my best friends. Same with my younger sister. I tell my mom everything, and my sister and I are friends with all the same people so we hang out alot. My older sister lives in Vancouver, so I don't talk to her that much. We get along fairly well when she's home, but we are so fundamentally different that it leads to conflicts. Mostly over my drug use. My dad is always working, so we don't see each other much. But growing up he always coached my softball team and for years he would drive me home from swimming practice so we got a good hour of talking in everyday. I miss it, but what are you gonna do?

I consider myself very lucky to have the family I do. In general we all get along and have a great time. But I know alot of my friends don't get along with their families at all. And that makes me sad.

I've had a little brother for a little over 2 years now (and I'm turning 22 in a few months) - his mom is a cunt; no seriously she is - she hacked my dad's email account and was keeping tabs on him through it. The joke's on her now, because he's in Saudi Arabia where he opened a gmail account (Muahahahahahaha).

My dad and I try to email each other as much as we can, seeing as we're a couple thousand miles apart, but neither of us have very much to say.

My mom and I talk too much for my liking, but living together in a 1 bedroom apartment, it's a bit hard to avoid it. That and we have such conflicting ideas (she says I'm too naive and I say she's too paranoid).

I wish I had a better relationship with both my parents. I live with my mum now as my dad left, but all we do is argue. I've got my dad's bad temper, I just get angry when they say stupid or pointless things, which is often. I should try to be less aggressive I suppose. I'd really love to connect more with my mum, my dad's a bit of an arsehole at times but who isn't? Things might change, or at least I hope they will.

Sad for you......22 huh you are one sad life

Ahh, yes. The reclusive teen. Hear me out: The world totally changes when you move out.

Once you move out from underneath their roof (even if you ARE paying for it) they'll start looking at you as more of an equal. A citizen who feeds himself and contributes to society. Right now they look at you as a parasite. They are entitled to bitch at you and give you shit.

All through my teens I hate my parents (specially my mother). I vowed the minute I got all my hands my bank account (that she hid from me) I would never speak to her again. This was a very passionate vow that I repeated for at least 3 years. Eventually I moved out and I didn't really talk to her. I didn't pick up the phone when she called. All I could think about was everytime she fucked me over. Everytime she was a fucking bitch. And now that I'm on my own, now that I have my OWN house, and live by my own rules she doesn't have shit over me. It was freeing at first. Now I could have sex whenever/wherever, I could smoke pot on the comfort of my own couch, I could have a party.

The novelty wore off within a year and after going through a serious transitional phase from dependence to complete independence I started examining myself. I realized I had a lot of hatred and resentment for my parents. For fucking up. For letting me do whatever the hell I felt like and for not TALKING to me. For not MAKING me talk to them. For not having enough balls to try to have a relationship with me. Cause I did the same shit you're doing. All through high school I came home to sleep and take a shower and I was out the door. The few words my mother and I did speak throughout the week were curses and yelling.

But I always stayed close to my brothers. I'm the oldest, so I pretty much directed how the relationship went. We talked a lot and now that I think about it, he's probably the reason I realized how important my family is.

Only now, that I have forgiven my parents and let go of shit that's been poisoning my life for so long, I feel better. Family's very important for your MENTAL HEALTH. If shit is fucked up with them, shit's going to be fucked up with anyone who gets close to you.

Bottom line - You're young, you have plenty of time to hate your parents and ignore your family. But the day is going to come where you're going to man up and embrace them - be aware.

And by the way, age difference means SHIT. I get along better with my professors that I do my classmates. The moment I started asking questions, my parents opened up I learned a lot about my dad's past that I had NO CLUE about before. We were so estranged at one point, he barely knew my boyfriend's (of 2 years!) name. I doubt he could name one of my best friends from high school.But now that I've taken the time and effort to get to know him, we're practically the same person.

Parents don't know what the hell they're doing. They take a mix of their own upbringing and their judgment and do the best they can. Sometimes their best sucks but you have to look past that. Children teach their parents. You might not have any interest in building a relationship with your parents and that's alright. Just try to keep your mind open.

he once kicked a hole in a door just because someone left the hall light on while he was sleeping

Almost choked on some food after reading that.

I honestly don't like my brother and sister, and try to avoid them as much as possible. The only interaction my mom and I have is when she's nagging about something. My dad and I kind of have a relationship, but its feeble at best. We go shooting together every once in a while, but other than that we don't talk or do anything.

People in my family aren't smart enough to hold a conversation with me for more than 20 minutes.

My brother kicked in MY door because I had his kraft dinner in my room. He was 10 at the time.

I have a six person family, and i'm only close to one of my brothers( the one thats closest in age to me). My dad's so busy he leaves for work at 8 in the morning and sometimes doesn't come home until 10 or 11 at night. My mom lives on the otherside of the world... so I don't talk/or see her much. just the good old "How are you doing? how's school? blah blah". My sister has messed up too many times for me to get clsoe to her, and my oldest brother has his own family he takes care of.


I can't wait to get out of my dad's house and start my own life. And not just for the partying (I don't even drink), it's because I want to live my life how I want it... not how he wants it.


But all in all... it's the new millenium... no one has the pictue perfect family anymore.

My brothers and I are really tight. My parents... well I think my dad hates me half the time and my mom tries to hard to get me to talk to her.

Ahh, yes. The reclusive teen. Hear me out: The world totally changes when you move out.


I'd have qoted the entire passage, but you all can read it in its entirety just a few clicks above. And it is NOT just about when you move out. I have read all of the posts, and all of the teen angst about conflict with your parents, your siblings and with your peers. Take just a minute or two and fucking get over it.

Nothing lasts forever. I did a post a few weeks ago about my father (and his abusive ways, along with his wife's and so forth) who passed away last month. And, bottom line... all of my poor, abused and neglected siblings gathered around to mourn the fact that they were not 'able' to make amends, or at least peace, before it was too late.

Everyone's parent(s) is, in their view, a total asshole until they get to a point in their life where they realize that, maybe, perhaps, their elders were actually righ in some, maybe many, or even all of their opinions or positions. But by that time, they were so set in their ways that facts and reality were no longer a viable issue. "I hate mom" and "I hate dad" were so ingrained into their lexicon that reality was no longer a point of realistic discussion.

Family is family... blood is supposed to be thcker than the mud.

Guess what? The ONLY one who can make it so is YOU. Please, don't sit back and make them make it 'all better' for you. YOU are the only one who can make it any better for ANY of you.

Go kiss your mom. Tell your father that you love him. Hug your brothers, kiss your sisters. (no tongue alllowed unless you post pics)

Jesus Christ folks, life is too short to play any kind of pissing games...............

i have lost both my parents. It sucks, but that's the way I've mostly grown up. I don't know where my mom is and my dad is in another country. I talk to him on the phoen sometimes.

I live with my grandmother and brother....man and nobody tries to shelter me at all. I can pretty much do whatever I want and I don't get any condescending judgements, unless i really fuck up.

Sometimes, you have to really fight for what you want. My brother was sort of like a father to me when I was growing up...but now he's more like my brother (he's 29 and I'm 17).

We didn't really have real respect for each other until our first argument a few months ago. I felt like my life wasn't going so well, and one day I got fed up with taking shit from my brother. It first started out with some small argument about college funding, and then it blew up to the point to where I was basically blaming him to death for everything that was wrong with my life. His life wasn't going too well either, and he was basically calling me weak for blaming others for my problems and all that kinda crap.

We shouted and yelled and cursed at each other for quite some time, and it even boiled up to the point where I was about to fight him (his physical stature was more intimidating...but I didn't give a fuck). Basically, a lot of hate just flushed out between us. It finally ended with us two having a cigarette together and apologizing to each other.

Out of that argument, I've learned a lot about myself and about my brother as well. We now have a new found respect for each other. I've earned his respect for standing up for myself and I myself have gained more respect for him as well. Though, I wouldn't say he's a close brother now...

But anyways, the point is, sometimes you just gotta let the other family member know what's up and let them know where you're coming from, and stand your ground.

I'm still learning to hold on to what I have.

Ahh, yes. The reclusive teen. Hear me out: The world totally changes when you move out.

Once you move out from underneath their roof (even if you ARE paying for it) they'll start looking at you as more of an equal. A citizen who feeds himself and contributes to society. Right now they look at you as a parasite. They are entitled to bitch at you and give you shit.


that never changed for me

i moved out and my parents still look at me like im a parasite


And by the way, age difference means SHIT. I get along better with my professors that I do my classmates.


that is very true

i think its like a pseudo parent/child relationship

probably why im so close to my sister (im old enough to be her farther)

I get along very well with my family. I am the youngest of three kids, and I'd have to say that my family gets along a lot better than most families. I feel very fortunate to have a family that gets along so well. My dad is there to help me out most of the time (when I really fuck up, he makes me solve shit on my own), and my mother is there to comfort me. I can have an honest conversation with everyone in my family.

I guess it kinda shows in my posts. I have no thread-starting topics, because I have a fairly good life. I noticed that the people who are most well-known on &T are pretty fucked up and have a lot of drama in their lives. It makes them into the people they are. I had a very stable life for the most part, and I am now very stable. It's an interesting effect.

i've never been a huggy huggy family love kid and i'm mostly very quiet, i have little to say to people i know like family and sort of friends. i don't think i've had a conversation with, touched, or at all got on with them since well before starting senior school. my family aren't that togethery, other than my mum+sister most of the time, and my dad is always leaving and coming back. but we have a teeny house with paper walls and everyone always seems to be on top of you and trying to live like a close family, but we're not? any sort of family-ish activity results in lots of arguments. holidays are even worse, so we rarely go on them and i don't go anymore. last one, my over-sensetive mum was crying before we even arrived in ireland...

none at all. i see my mum and sister watching tv together and having conversations and it just freaks me out, like, i didn't realise that was a normal thing.
i don't talk to my mum, sometimes(like once or twice a week) she tries to talk by asking a really dumb question like "enjoy school?" and i just nod. she doesn't understand anything i have to say to her and cries all the time and accuses me of calling her stupid.

i avoid my dad because any attempt at conversation results in him getting mad at me over nothing or going on about how i am suchhhh an idiot or whatever. he goes nuts over tiny things, sometimes nothing and uses the excuses "because i can", "it's my house/sofa/water" and "because i am your dad" way too often.

well, my sister has half a foot and 70lbs on me and hits me in the face with frozen meat. needless to say, we don't get on and i avoid her like the plague. also, she's a little snitch and if she sees me out she'll tell my mum. she saw me walking with my boyfriend sunday, ran home to tell my mum and my mum has tried to talk to me about it six times since then. she never gives up, and just goes on and on.


i get on with everyone else's parents better than my own. my aunt is more like my mum than my mum is, and knows hella lots more than my mum does, which still isn't a lot.


oh that was so long and moany :[
summarise: i don't get on with my family because my sister's a beast, my dad's retarded and my mum's too dumb to function.