Ok so I met this chick, she's just 2 months older than me. (She'll be 19 in June) She fronted me a nice big bag of some nuggets so I know she's cool. I need to know how to RAPE HER without coming on too strong.

BUt seriously, how do I get laid? I want some pussy, she invited me over to her house tomorrow, she's home alone till Sunday...we're gonna smoke pot and shit........but how do I get into her pants? TELL ME DAMNIT! PLZ!!!!!!!!!

THX!

Pretty clear message from her if she's invited you over for a smoke with an empty house.
but if you need help starting things off, you could always try giving eachother shotguns. (blowing smoke into her mouth from yours, the airtightness will fuck you guys up and will give you an excuse to put your lips on hers)

I'm not going to give you step-by-step instructions, this is a golden opportunity you've been presented with and it probably wouldn't hurt to rock up with a bottle of tequila.

Apart from that, don't sabotage yourself by being obsessed with getting laid; just try to have a good time. If she is having one too good things are bound to happen.

And please, try to be cooler (as in just as a person, not popularity) in real life then you appear to be in that post.

And please, try to be cooler (as in just as a person, not popularity) in real life then you appear to be in that post.

I lol'd. But it's true.

don't try to hard, even if it does seem like she wants you, just start hitting on her and try to make a move, if she backs off, stay cool and just have a good time

rofl, I will attempt it. Thanks for noticing. :) I can handle things!

Please dont either a) come off like the douchebag that you sounded like in your post or b) talk like a douche on the internet and then be a pussy bitch IRL.

Just stay cool and let shit happen, and be confident.

Haha, she wouldn't be hanging out with me if I was a douchebag. I'm a really nice person, I just want to have a good time like anyone else. She's really cool, we like all the same bands and all that. She has no idea I even have a computer, if that says anything to you. Thanks for the assistance, my fellow Totseans!

I'm going over there tomorrow night after she gets off work. I'll update if anyone cares.

Yeah, I'd say wise up a little bit.

Here's an idea.. offer to give her a massage whilst you're both stoned.

Honestly, it'll be great and you can pick up from there. Once you have one kiss, the rest sounds like it'll flow.

Doode holly crap xhippie hunterx lives in the same city as me this is so fucked up.

um...
and for the rest of the thread...cheers?

You could at least drop me some respect if you're going to plagarise my post.

I'm a really nice person... Thanks for the assistance, my fellow Totseans!

I'm going over there tomorrow night after she gets off work. I'll update if anyone cares.


ok first off, drop that nice guy shit.. bitches dont want no 'nice guys' and if they do, then thats how you know youre fuckin with the wrong bitches..

be and asshole.

also,

dont go over there to spit game and look corny, just keep it light hearted, smoke a blunt, pop open a bottle and see what happens ahaha

ok first off, drop that nice guy shit.. bitches dont want no 'nice guys' and if they do, then thats how you know youre fuckin with the wrong bitches..

be and asshole.

also,

dont go over there to spit game and look corny, just keep it light hearted, smoke a blunt, pop open a bottle and see what happens ahaha

Dats right. It's all chill brah. Jus' smoke dem blunts and wait til dat bitch gets freaky on yo ass.

Giggedy Giggedy.

But yeh... Go for it. And remember... eye contact! Although not creepy stalker-like constant staring, you understand. But eye contact is essential. It will lead up to the kiss.

Ask her if she wants a back rub...

Rub her back, then her legs. Move up to her ass and rub her pussy. Girls can't say no in this situation. You just have to be creative from here.

Tell her she smells and she needs a shower, but jam your foot in the door and watch her undress! Anything less smooth with end in failure.


...but yeah, the fact that she has invited you around to her house, assuming it is just you two and not a small croud, gives the impression she likes you. Maybe she'll rape you? Who knows.