Theres this girl I know, and we are sort of in the stage of "maybe going out, maybe staying just friends." but I really want her. How do I avoid the "Friend Zone" and what exactly is it? ever getting friends with benefits out of it?

There's no "avoiding" the friends zone, guys should just accept that.

You're either "boyfriend" material or "boy-friend" material but it's not something you can alter or choose.

Guys just don't seem to understand.

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Well this person I might ask to go to a concert with me, but I want it was a Date. she might accept it as a Friend Thing. But if it Is a Friend thing, I dont want to lose my spot standing for her *I have floor tix* if there is no chance of getting Any, I dont want to be her man child for that night if its not a date. So how shall I do this?

You need to determine for sure which category you're in first.

Are your conversations mostly about her issues/ people/ likes/ peeves /etc or what you like? eg. Cars, sports, common interests with her.

And if you say both, give a percentage of who takes up more of the conversation. Like if 60% of your talks are about her day and only 40% about the car you want or something..


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Its usually just random shit. Like if we are watching a movie in class, we make fun of it. Or like talk about whatever is happening, occassionally weekened stuff.

Does hit you? (playfully) or slaps, or even a hand on your shoulder works.

Except hugs, those are bad.

It should tell you which of the above you are.

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doing things lightly and beating around the bush will only get you so far

you foots in the door and your not pushing

start coming on to her really strong start flirting like mad and get touchy feely with her

don't worry about scaring her away now your past that stage already

^ Umm....no.

You don't want to act like a desperate creep, that'll automatically push her away and shove you into the 'friends' category.

Just, play it cool man. Find out subtlely.

No hugs yet. Playful with hands during some classes, like drawing on and rubbing. I want to know before the show though, but I dont want to slither around her like a creep and draw her away, she is a pretty hot sex type thing, but she has a personality too. All of these subtleties are fucking with my headspace!

Just don't give a fuck. I'm in that stage now but I don't care because I know that nothing is permanent and when they want me I'll be there and if I want to keep them I'll keep them addicted to myself.

does this make sense?

does anything?

Playful with hands during some classes, like drawing on and rubbing.


That's enough for you to know she's flirting. I'd say go for it.


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in my experience during the more-than-friends-less-than-a-couple stage its very difficult to "push her away"

now before you say "well in my experience blah blah blah" think about how your boyfriend(s) acted just before they became your partner as opposed to your boy-friends who didn't

remember the decisions we make aren't always conscious ones

in my experience during the more-than-friends-less-than-a-couple stage its very difficult to "push her away"

now before you say "well in my experience blah blah blah" think about how your boyfriend(s) acted just before they became your partner as opposed to your boy-friends who didn't

remember the decisions we make aren't always conscious ones


They're usually not conscious decisions because that's the point when people are most nervous and don't know how to act. In this situation, signs can be interpreted properly, and thus the advantage is that he can act on them consciously.

As for the more-than-friends-less-than-couples stage, I'd say that that would be the easiest time to accidentally "push her away". It's the time when decisions are made so what's done during it make you most vulnerable to being categorized.


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They're usually not conscious decisions because that's the point when people are most nervous and don't know how to act. In this situation, signs can be interpreted properly, and thus the advantage is that he can act on them consciously.

As for the more-than-friends-less-than-couples stage, I'd say that that would be the easiest time to accidentally "push her away". It's the time when decisions are made so what's done during it make you most vulnerable to being categorized.


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if you say so

we've obviously had conflicting experiences

the truth probably lies in-between

the truth probably lies in-between

i can agree with this

i'm in the same situation... the maybe-friends-maybe-couple bullshit.

She wanted to talk to me, and i just shoo'ed her (in a semi-polite manner, not literally "shoo bitch!!") and at first i felt like ass. But now... after a couple of minutes... it doesn't feel that bad.

Find something better to do first. For me, as a total music freak, concerts are such sacred events that I wouldn't want to taint it by having to bring a chick along. I mean I had a female concert buddy but there was no ambiguity as to what was happening. I knew I wasn't getting any and I was also under no obligation to entertain her and cater to her while the band was on. She could find whatever spot she liked the best and flirt with whoever and I could pick my favorite spot and we would meet up at the end of the show. If you really like the band, don't bring her!

I don't believe in the "friend zone," seeing as I was friends with my beloved first, before we turned out to be total soulmates. :) And there are tons of posts on the relationship forums I've been to about "OH NOES I LIKE A FRIEND WILL THIS RUIN OUR FRIENDSHIP."

just go for the bitch, or ignore her

then see what happens?

I have never feared the friend zone, save once (right now actually, but a different story). I'm always friends with the girls I date, I just make friends with them for the purpose of dating them. Once I have trust, I start to escalate things.

THANKS! Ok, you obviously have good taste, Faith No More, "Angel Dust" is one of my all time favorites! And btw, the show is Velvet Revolver and Im seeing them for my first time and want to get up very close! *Its at a place called Warfield in SF for those who know :) * and I dont want this bitch fucking up my time. Ive seen the new GNR four times this year, and I must see Slash with out some bitch telling me "Its too rough up here!" or right when he started soloing "I gotta pee" or "I gotta adjust my tampon!". And also, btw, why am I calling her a bitch? Cause I asked her to hang out yesterday or today and she said "Well, Im going to be in San diego" so I said ok. Yesterday she was with some friends of hers at night, and I saw her. No guys were involved, so I was like fuck it whatever. Shes baning hot too. So I asked her if she wanted to hang out today, shes like "Im in San Diego l0lz." I then see her walking near my house with some asshole in my class. Fuck this bitch, she has fucked me over many a time before, and as much as Id love to get with her thick, smooth legs, and her tan, Double D breasts, she will Not ruin my chance to see Velvet Revolver in a small club.