I know this is the kinda thing where you wait until the time is right and you are actually in love with them. and there is no real timetable for this. But I'm just curious as to how long most people had been with someone before they dropped the L word.

My girlfriend told me the other night when we were in bed, and she was drunk...we both were. we had only been together just short of 3 months...it seemed a little quick to me. In the morning she said it again when sober, to prove that it wasn't just the booze talking, and I said it back....but it feels wierd saying it, and I'm not exactly sure if i really feel it...though I do really care for her.

Thoughts?

shit I waited like 6 months and it was after a big argument

Hell, when she tells me she loves me, I just say "I know." Honestly, what could be a more badass response than that?

quote:Originally posted by Rocko:

Hell, when she tells me she loves me, I just say "I know." Honestly, what could be a more badass response than that?

it is a good response. But I think it would come across as kinda callous...

quote:Originally posted by chickenpoop:

it is a good response. But I think it would come across as kinda callous...

That's a good thing.

I think it was barely two/three months for me and my boy. He whispered it in my ear while we were at the movies. I was a little shocked.

quote:Originally posted by Rocko:

Hell, when she tells me she loves me, I just say "I know." Honestly, what could be a more badass response than that?

lol han solo

quote:Originally posted by youngnastyman:

lol han solo

Best learn from the pimp master himself.

a bit over three months. he said it when we were in bed, about to go to sleep. i was shocked, didn't respond for a minute or so, then said it back.

i think it was too soon. not that i don't feel that i love him, but too soon to verbalise it.

quote:Originally posted by NoSkills:



i think it was too soon. not that i don't feel that i love him, but too soon to verbalise it.

Ya, thats sorta what I'm feeling now.

I'm wondering why some of you have trouble verbalizing your feelings. Have you not completely gotten over the times you've been hurt in the past, are you confused, or what?

Six months? I can't really remember.

Although what really annoys me is people saying "I love you" after being with each other for two or three weeks and acting like they really mean it. Two weeks is not enough time to love somebody properly.

The thing I hate is that people think that you gotta wait forever to say it or some shit like that. Just say it when the time is right and you fucking feel it. Dont second guess yourself and put a few words on some kind of pedastal. Its just a few words and words are nothing anyway. If you really love the person then just fucking tell them if you don't then don't tell them. Theres no too soon or any shit like that as long as you actually feel the emotion your expressing.

quote:Originally posted by grungekid:

The thing I hate is that people think that you gotta wait forever to say it or some shit like that. Just say it when the time is right and you fucking feel it. Dont second guess yourself and put a few words on some kind of pedastal. Its just a few words and words are nothing anyway. If you really love the person then just fucking tell them if you don't then don't tell them. Theres no too soon or any shit like that as long as you actually feel the emotion your expressing.

Did you read my original post? thats basically the idea I was trying to say. But I think those words are more than "just words". I think they get thrown around way too much.

45 minutes. Then I kicked her out of bed and threw some change at her so she could catch the bus back to the race track.

My boyfriend said it to me after something like 4 days. Which I thought was a little strange.....I didn't say it back for quite awhile.

About 12 hours after first meeting. After 24 hours we'd regarded ourselves as wedded. Infact we still celebrate that day as our wedding anniversary and not the day the State say we married.

(We're a bit weird and regard the State as intrinsically evil...*loads shotgun and scans horizon for 'revenoo' men*)

Of course there is a timetable, as soon as she lets you fuck her in the ass, thats love.

bump. would like a few more real answers....not likely on this forum.

quote:Originally posted by Punisher1012:

shit I waited like 6 months and it was after a big argument

Admittedly, I usually only say 'I love you' after we have an argument. Or as a reply to an 'I love you' from him.

Why?

Because I usually get asked why I stay, or why he stays with me. He says it alot to me off-hand, affectionately. He's that kind of person.

I'm not.

It's a big thing for me to say 'I love you'. I'm big on the 'actions speak louder than words' part of life. I feel that constantly needing to reaffirm love by saying it is a bit silly. Love is how you act, what you do and why you do it. Rather than what you say. It needs to feel like love for me, to really badly want to say it.

How long did we wait? I don't know. I'ts feels like forever.

I can't remember. It feels like I loved her from the first time we spoke and the day we actually verbalised it kind of blurs since we were both living with the unspoken knowledge we loved each other, and it was accepted.

I remember when I told her I was in love with her, though. It's an important distinction. That was a wonderful night. One of my best memories, ever. That was about six months after I met her.

[This message has been edited by Mr.Happy (edited 03-26-2007).]

I have only been with my girlfriend for a few weeks but I have known her for over a year before and we were really good mates before going out. I told her I love her the other day, becasue I do. Whatever.

I have been in love so many times that such details are hard to remember. But, if I felt it, I usually said it. Rarely would I hold such a thing back.

I told that to her last night as we looked out of my car at the sea.

She looked at me a little wierdly for a moment, and I clarified.

"Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to start stalking you or anything. But I can't see anything wrong with removing the barriers in my heart for you."

She just hugged me reeeeeal tight and rested her head on my lap.

A month or so, I didn't directly say I love them but I said other things implying it. I told her yesterday.

She dumped me slightly after.

bout two months? after six months of seeing each other almost dailyyy.

now it just pops up whenever, lots in the morning

Way too soon. I still say it but I don't mean it. She said it to me after about 2 weeks.

My girlfriend told me about four days into the relationship.

The nice thing is though, it felt right. I know it should have freaked me the hell out but it didn't. B)

The other night, I told my girl I love her when I was really drunk. I don't remember what she said (partial black-out) but she said her response was "no you don't."

Oh, and it was after only one week of dating/fucking .

[This message has been edited by Cozy Amnesia (edited 03-26-2007).]

Love is a beautifully intense feeling that lasts an astonishingly short amount of time.

quote:Originally posted by landspeed_presents:

Love is a beautifully intense feeling that lasts an astonishingly short amount of time.

I'm really hesitant to ever say that. I loved a girl once, and we were together for a long time. We broke up a long time ago. I haven't felt even the slightest urge to say it to anyone since. I feel akward when I have to make some noncommittal response when someone says it to me.

For her, I had probably known her almost a year, and had been "with her" (the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing seems ignorant, and I can't help feel disdain for it) for a few months. I felt it a long time before I said it. I guess I still do. But I won't say it again.

mike

Every guy should tell her girl she loves her unless hes an idiot.

quote:Originally posted by darkmasta:

Every guy should tell his girl he loves her unless hes an idiot.

mmmmmm, pronouns

Depends, if you want the bitch to go to the store & buy the beer & shit, do it. If you say it to make her feel good, DON"T That's when you say goodbye to the boy's downstairs.

I said it after 2 months with my gf. I had been wanting to say it for a week or so, but after thinking I had been in love before, I restrained myself. Then one night I just started walking down the steps from her porch, turned, and blurted it out. She seemed sorta shocked (she had a couple similar bad experiences with the whole love concept). But she responded after the shock, and I could tell it was genuine, so it wasn't a disaster after all...

As long as you mean it, and genuinely feel that way, it deserves being said. But otherwise, don't feel as though you need to.

I can't remember the first time he said it, but I know he said it first. I think I don't remember because it just seemed like a natural transition. Although it did bother me a bit how he only said it after sex at first. But now we tell each other we love each other every day.

I dunno, it was only a few days, less than a week i believe.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:



(We're a bit weird and regard the State as intrinsically evil...*loads shotgun and scans horizon for 'revenoo' men*)

You're not wierd. You're just an American in denial.

If you're not sure you feel it, why did you say it?

About a week ago. She hasn't said it back yet.

Yeah, we've both been hurt blah blah blah, you know, all the meaningless shit that people say to fill the awkward silences.

My fella said it to me when he was drunk...we both were, I replied with "Yeah? I know!" ...and he followed with "Maybe I shouldn't say that while intoxicated?"

Hmm...I wonder if he ment it

I told her I loved her about a month after we started dating. We both knew it, for a while, too. It was almost a formality, but I realized I had never said it, and I did, and it felt so awesome.

quote:Originally posted by bloodenangel:

[B] Admittedly, I usually only say 'I love you' after we have an argument. Or as a reply to an 'I love you' from him.

Why?

Because I usually get asked why I stay, or why he stays with me. He says it alot to me off-hand, affectionately. He's that kind of person.

I'm not.

It's a big thing for me to say 'I love you'. I'm big on the 'actions speak louder than words' part of life. I feel that constantly needing to reaffirm love by saying it is a bit silly. Love is how you act, what you do and why you do it. Rather than what you say. It needs to feel like love for me, to really badly want to say it.

[B]

Oh wow, you're about 99% like me with that. i feel no need to say it, talk is cheap and actions determine it, not what you say.

If I really feel it (and that takes a long time, at least 6-8 months) then I say it once in a while. If it's just strong feelings, then I don't bother, I'm not gonna lie to someone.

It's also a little fragile with me, at least early on, and if I know/feel that someone doesn't feel that way about me, then I can't seem to feel it towards them. Hm.

Must have been after about 2 months.

quote:Originally posted by grungekid:

The thing I hate is that people think that you gotta wait forever to say it or some shit like that. Just say it when the time is right and you fucking feel it. Dont second guess yourself and put a few words on some kind of pedastal. Its just a few words and words are nothing anyway. If you really love the person then just fucking tell them if you don't then don't tell them. Theres no too soon or any shit like that as long as you actually feel the emotion your expressing.

It's stuff like this that makes me wonder why I'm so petrified to say it. I think he's waiting for me to say it first, and I won't.

We've been going out for 5 months and all the goodbyes are pretty awkward.

She said it to me after about a month of dating.