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quote: But the statistics for marriages involving a person who has bipolar disorder are especially sobering—an estimated 90 percent of these end in divorce, according to a November 2003 article, “Managing Bipolar Disorder,”

And those that don't get divorced face hell? On/off relationships? etc?

What are they to do? Just seek out a partner with bipolar? Take meds and become a zombie? Or give a gun a blowjob?

I suffer from something a lot worse than bipolar disorder and I'm still married, my little hombre.

You have to stop letting thoughts of your "disorder" consume you. People with psychological disorders have a medical condition just like epilepsy or diabeties. I mean I go to my shrink 3 times a week and I take valium for my panic attacks, percocet for my severe migranes and ambien so I can sleep. I have been committed no less than THREE times since getting married and my husband has suffered through many "episodes" where he had to call my shrink for help. He also suffers through my depressions which happen...frequently.

My point is that yes it may be difficult for a person with psychological problems to find love, but hey...Even "normal" people seem to have trouble with that, so I don't know.

Don't believe everything you read.

Bipolar is bad because the person you're with may only love half the person you are. Not much is like it.

If I'm doomed to a marriage like yours I want to find out what the sound "bang" tastes like when it comes out of a gun.

Shleeeepy time.

[This message has been edited by arquin (edited 03-18-2007).]

Okay...What do you mean? My husband and I have our ups and downs, but we are always in love and generally very happy together. It's always easy to look in from the outside and make a judgement.

But you know, I support suicide and all, especially carried out by little hombres like you.

My brother was bipolar and one minute he would act like the most narcissistic person ive ever met and get this evil look in his eyes. The next minute he would be fine, having fun and caring.

President,

I just popped in to Totse for a minute and saw your post. I'll respond more later. This is a great topic. I was in a relationship with a bi-polar once. What fucking HELL. Wow there is so much to talk about regarding this topic.

I will post more when I can sit down with more time.

[This message has been edited by CptnCrackHound (edited 03-18-2007).]

Its hard as hell to treat. They will take there pills when they are manic depressive but as soon as they go manic they think there god and don't need there pills. Its probably the worse form of psychosis around.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I suffer from something a lot worse than bipolar disorder and I'm still married, my little hombre.

You have to stop letting thoughts of your "disorder" consume you. People with psychological disorders have a medical condition just like epilepsy or diabeties. I mean I go to my shrink 3 times a week and I take valium for my panic attacks, percocet for my severe migranes and ambien so I can sleep. I have been committed no less than THRICE since getting married and my husband has suffered through many "episodes" where he had to call my shrink for help. He also suffers through my depressions which happen...frequently.

My point is that yes it may be difficult for a person with psychological problems to find love, but hey...Even "normal" people seem to have trouble with that, so I don't know.

Don't believe everything you read.

Fixed for reasons of my OCD'ness...

My mom is bipolar (unmedicated) and her and my dad have been married for like 25 years.

I worry about my boyfriend having to deal with my mental issues (depression), but if someone really loves you, I think things can work out. Like Xiao and her husband.

You're not doomed. I've had relationships with girls with BPD, sure they were difficult but in the end it was rarely the disorder that spelled of the end of the relationship.

You just need to find a nice girl that'll put up with you.

-F☺rd

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

bipolar (unmedicated)

*licks teeth*

Well there's your problem.

I used to think it was all self-manifested, til i experienced manic depressive behavior...what a turn around caused some marital issues, but we are good now

im bipolar and what I have noticed is I never can commit to a relationship I always notice non existant negative attributes in the girls Im going out with, So I just have consistent one nigh stands with different girls like 3 times a week. so I can belive the divorce rate in bipolar people is 90% bipolar is a hard disease to manage

I'll have to jump on the bandwagon as well. I, too, am bi-polar, and actually read about that divorce rate a few weeks back.

It hits like a ton of bricks. I've had my share of relationships, but I'm just too unstable to keep it going. I've pretty much come to terms with the fact that I'll be alone for awhile, but I'm sure there's gotta be SOMEONE out there with the patience.

If not, I'll heed your advice and give a gun a blow job. Sounds messy.

Heh, why am I not suprised? On one hand you can be impulsive, narcissistic, running around on top of the world, or conversely you can be wallowing in pity and self-loathing.

People who start a relationship while feeling manic (happens a lot, I've noticed) tend to go, "Oh fucking god what did I do" when they start crashing and feel like an angel of Hell. When people start a relationship while depressed, though, they later find in their God-like state that they don't need their significant other.

That reminds me, I need to take my medication...

i think the art is to enjoy your own instability and the impacts on your life and just accept that god towards you (not that i assume you believe in one) is a sadistic bastard who's humor you might as well enjoy cause otherwise life's gonna be crap.

And that was sorta double but i don't care

All this has led me to one question: Do you fight it or just embrace it?

A person smarter than me once compared a mushroom trip to surfing. He said you can either embrace and accept that the wave is coming, and surf it. That's a good trip. Or, you can try and fight the wave. That's a bad trip.

Not the most relevant example ever, but you get the picture. Are you supposed to fight what you feel, to make your self more appealing to people? Or are you supposed to just go with it, and take your odds in finding some one who likes you for you?

Fight it or embrace it?

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

All this has led me to one question: Do you fight it or just embrace it?

A person smarter than me once compared a mushroom trip to surfing. He said you can either embrace and accept that the wave is coming, and surf it. That's a good trip. Or, you can try and fight the wave. That's a bad trip.

Not the most relevant example ever, but you get the picture. Are you supposed to fight what you feel, to make your self more appealing to people? Or are you supposed to just go with it, and take your odds in finding some one who likes you for you?

Fight it or embrace it?

I don't think the two have to be mutually exclusive.

quote:Originally posted by Rizzo in a box:

People who start a relationship while feeling manic (happens a lot, I've noticed) tend to go, "Oh fucking god what did I do" when they start crashing and feel like an angel of Hell.

That reminds me, I need to take my medication...

QFT

Well. It one of the reasons that I don't get involved with crazy girls. It's just way too stresful.

But i think most of the divorces occur because one is not tolerant of the other and the medicated one doesn't really care for the other. Basically everything that ruins a normal marriage.

W/e

quote:Originally posted by Rizzo in a box:

That reminds me, I need to take my medication...

Thanks for reminding me to take mine.

Lithium for the lose.

I'm clearly bi-polar as well and I think Rizzo was dead on. I started going out with my girlfriend on a manic cycle and every time I crash we start to fight and I always come so close to ending it but so far I haven't.

I love my girlfriend but when I hit the low part of the cycle its just over for me.

Plus the Lithium makes me feel like... well like I can't feel anything. That makes me question my love for her and it's all a big mess.

[This message has been edited by Suicide_Mouse (edited 03-20-2007).]

I used to ask the question "If they only love you when you're on your meds, do they even love you?"

Then some one told me: "You on your meds is how you were 'supposed' to be made, that's the real you."

As if being an adolescent wasn't confusing enough. As some one with bipolar, you never love some one enough, and then you love them too much. Distant and clingy. I'm starting to think that relationships aren't for the emotionally unstable. It's unfair on the person we subject ourselves to. Rather that a career based on emotion would be the right path. Counselor? Writer? Director? I don't know.

When people are sad they're all like "I need my meds, I'm so pathetic, whaaa whaaa". Then when they're manic they're all "I'm a mo'fucking GAWD bitches! I don't need no meds, gods don't need meds". shitty cycle. Hmmm...

So much bullshit. Stop fighting it and just surf the wave...?

So many people are Bi-polar.. or at least claiming it.

Some people have tried to tell me I'm Bi-Polar. Never had a professional tell me I am. Just some people I know.

Though I know now that if I had it.. I either no longer have it.. or can control it.

On that note, I think most of our mental diseases are either a figment of our imagination.. or once you're told you have it, you let it control you.

I don't think it has anything to do with "fighting it" or just rolling with it. I think most people in this world are just too weak minded to do anything REAL about it. Other than take the pills the doctor told em they need because sometimes they are happy, and other times they aren't.

quote:Originally posted by outcast234:

So many people are Bi-polar.. or at least claiming it.

It's quite common. Approximately 1/100 people have it. That's a fair few.

quote:Originally posted by outcast234:

Though I know now that if I had it.. I either no longer have it.. or can control it.

It's a life long illness. You don't lose it. Although it's quite possible, with the right conditions, that you control it. Honestly, if you're living a nice, carefree life, then it'll be easier to control than say...if you were living in the slums.

quote:Originally posted by outcast234:

On that note, I think most of our mental diseases are either a figment of our imagination..

Hmmm, what an ignorant thing to say.

Chemicals make up emotions. Sometimes there are chemical imbalances in the brain. There's nothing imaginary about that. Some have to do with seratonin, dopamine, melatonin, etc. How does one imagine this?

quote:Originally posted by outcast234:

or once you're told you have it, you let it control you.

Hmmm, nah. Possible but not likely. The mentally ill don't perceive reality the way it is. That's why they make poor decisions. They're a slave to their perceptions. But sure, you could be right in that it controls them, but they're not exactly 'letting it'. I'm not only talking about bipolar any more, since you said "the mentally ill".

There are some illnesses that are just environmental, those are the ones that people let control them. Because more effort put into rehabilitation or a change of environment would get rid of the illness. How ever, some illnesses are biological. It's in their genetics.

Don't be ignorant, these things aren't made up. They might be blown out of proportion at times, but they ARE real and they put real people at real disadvantages every day.

quote:Originally posted by outcast234:

I don't think it has anything to do with "fighting it" or just rolling with it. I think most people in this world are just too weak minded to do anything REAL about it. Other than take the pills the doctor told em they need because sometimes they are happy, and other times they aren't.

You take for granted what you have, as we all do.

It's more than just "happy somtimes and other times they aren't" because that's called life dipshit. How can some one be 'happy' unless there was a 'sad'? If there wasn't a sad, it'd be called 'normal', right?

Next there's depression, where you're permanently sad.

Then there's a few mental illnesses between depression and bipolar, that are lesser forms of bipolar.

Bipolar has some very physical side effects that cant be made up. I could explain it to you, but I think I've already said way too much.

quote:Originally posted by outcast234:

So many people are Bi-polar.. or at least claiming it.

Some people have tried to tell me I'm Bi-Polar. Never had a professional tell me I am. Just some people I know.

Though I know now that if I had it.. I either no longer have it.. or can control it.

On that note, I think most of our mental diseases are either a figment of our imagination.. or once you're told you have it, you let it control you.

I don't think it has anything to do with "fighting it" or just rolling with it. I think most people in this world are just too weak minded to do anything REAL about it. Other than take the pills the doctor told em they need because sometimes they are happy, and other times they aren't.

I agree with you, shrinks hurt more than they help by telling someone that they have "depression" or a "personality disorder" or some other "label." Some people have a legitimate mental illness, but those folks are generally in a hospital, in prison or just homless. Some of them might be lucky enough to have family to take care of them...Those are the peole with real mental illness. Sometimes I get all "depressed" and feel all sorry for myself because of my "mental illness," but then other times I realise that if you can function on a day to day basis, then you aren't even that affected by your problem...Or at least not in a way that really matters.

The label is what controls people because after you're labeled as "bipolar" or "depressed" or whatever, then it gives you an answer and an excuse for all of your fuck ups.

If you can function in society, then you don't have it that bad.

Also, I used to let my "mental illness" control me a lot more, but then I discovered ways to kind of...Head it off. It doesn't ALWAYS work, but it does when things aren't that bad yet. Things like baking, painting and crocheting really help me. I think the creative process is like a natural crazy fighter, because it calms you and focuses your mind on something else. I also find that if I just go on a walk that I will feel better, if I'm just feeling depressed or something.

And when I get manic, I don't feel so much like a god as I feel pissed off and homicidal.

My label is "Schitzoid personality disorder/schitzotypal personality disorder" BTW. It's all bullshit, IMO.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I think the creative process is like a natural crazy fighter, because it calms you and focuses your mind on something else.

I agree. That's why they have art therapy.

quote:Originally posted by oc6:

I agree. That's why they have art therapy.

hmm you mean...if you get to take enough photos you'll become a fluffy bunny of a girl?:P

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

hmm you mean...if you get to take enough photos you'll become a fluffy bunny of a girl?:P

My only mental illness is menopause, so give it ten years or so and it will go away.

Hmmm....wild life photo's. I'll have to try that as a self portrait idea.

*don's bunny suit*

quote:Originally posted by oc6:

My only mental illness is menopause, so give it ten years or so and it will go away.

Hmmm....wild life photo's. I'll have to try that as a self portrait idea.

*don's bunny suit*

*phones Mr.E.Fudd * :P

Ain't many women your age who could pull off being a 'Bunny Girl' but you could.

And I thought that I was your only mental affliction???!!!

My friend's bipolar mother is marrying a bipolar man, to live.. happily ever after? :S

Luckily they can't have kids, which means if their relationship becomes utterly eroded, at least they're not causing other people grief.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

*phones Mr.E.Fudd * :P

Ain't many women your age who could pull off being a 'Bunny Girl' but you could.

And I thought that I was your only mental affliction???!!!



[laughs heartily]

Some day he is gonna get that wabbit. :P

In my experience, having a relationship with someone with bipolar can be extremely difficult. With the mood swings, fighting, and everything else, it gets tough to stay together.

Well, I'm not bipolar, but I have my own set of problems. I can't control emotion a lot of the time (although meditating on how much I love her can help), but what I can control is how I act. I may feel like it's perfectly reasonable to suspect her of breaking the entire internets so she doesn't have to talk to me, but I have made a rule to never, ever go off on her - no matter how justified it may seem at the time. And then the tide of mental illness recedes and I can see clearly again.

Just a thought. Dunno how much it might help.

quote:Originally posted by outcast234:

So many people are Bi-polar.. or at least claiming it.

Some people have tried to tell me I'm Bi-Polar. Never had a professional tell me I am. Just some people I know.

Though I know now that if I had it.. I either no longer have it.. or can control it.

On that note, I think most of our mental diseases are either a figment of our imagination.. or once you're told you have it, you let it control you.

I don't think it has anything to do with "fighting it" or just rolling with it. I think most people in this world are just too weak minded to do anything REAL about it. Other than take the pills the doctor told em they need because sometimes they are happy, and other times they aren't.

+1

I'm Bi-polar and I used to go to a counselor

they fucking tell you so much crap, he did more to confuse me than the condition itself.

And sorry, but what the fuck is lithium about? They shouldn't give that shit to people.

being BP is part of your personality and you shouldn't be told it's a disease, people feel so fucking sorry for themselves and let it dominate their lives because its called a disease, if you just get on with it embrace it and get to know yourself you can cope well enough..

quote:Originally posted by Twisted_Ferret:

Well, I'm not bipolar, but I have my own set of problems. I can't control emotion a lot of the time (although meditating on how much I love her can help), but what I can control is how I act. I may feel like it's perfectly reasonable to suspect her of breaking the entire internets so she doesn't have to talk to me, but I have made a rule to never, ever go off on her - no matter how justified it may seem at the time. And then the tide of mental illness recedes and I can see clearly again.

Just a thought. Dunno how much it might help.

I wish my boyfriend had this attitude. He doesn't get mad at me that often, but when he does it's usually over something retarded and when he calms down he realises that.

I think manic-depressives are just really sensitive to everything. They just take everything to a more intense, extreme level. Which while useful, is not ideal.