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| My God Can Beat the Shit Out of Your God For discussing any and all religious viewpoints. Intolerance will not be tolerated. Keeping your sense of humor is required. Posting messages about theological paradoxes is encouraged. |
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#1
 2007-03-16, 19:30 |
HideandSeek 
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 How to go to heaven.
All people sin and fall short of God's glory. No amount of good works can buy your way into heaven; however, God so loved the world that he sent his own son to die for our sins so we can all have everlasting life.
quote:
John 3:16
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
Regardless of the sins you have committed in your life, you to can go to heaven!
If you want the peace of knowing you're saved and will forever be with Jesus Christ, pray with me:
quote:
Dear Lord,
I know I am a sinner and that I have fallen short of your glory.
Please come into my life, deliver me from my sin and give me everlasting life.
I believe in my heart and confess with my mouth that Jesus Christ is lord and saviour.
Amen.
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#2
2007-03-16, 19:32 |
Omony
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Re: How to go to heaven.
Amen.
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#3
2007-03-16, 19:33 |
ductape
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Re: How to go to heaven.
Amen
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#4
2007-03-16, 19:33 |
jdawson
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Re: How to go to heaven.
Amen.
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#5
2007-03-16, 19:35 |
lemon cake
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Re: How to go to heaven.
C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
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#6
2007-03-16, 19:36 |
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Re: How to go to heaven.
That's exactly what the priest told me right before he stuck his hand down my pants.
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#7
2007-03-16, 19:36 |
Source
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Re: How to go to heaven.
http://www.totse.com/bbs/Forum15/HTML/006752.html
[This message has been edited by Source (edited 03-16-2007).]
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#8
2007-03-16, 19:38 |
Omony
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Re: How to go to heaven.
quote:Originally posted by Source:
http: //www.tots e.com/bbs/ Forum15/HTML/006752.html (http: //www.tots e.com/bbs/ Forum15/HT ML/006752. html)
Eat shit.
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#9
2007-03-16, 19:40 |
Source
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Re: How to go to heaven.
quote:Originally posted by Omony:
Eat shit.
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#10
2007-03-16, 19:40 |
Indulgence
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Re: How to go to heaven.
*consumes Christ's flesh baked into a cracker*
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#11
2007-03-16, 19:41 |
Omony
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Re: How to go to heaven.
quote:Originally posted by Source:
TO DAL LEFT TO DAL LEFT, TO DAR RIGHT TO DAR RIGHT!!!!! |
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#12
2007-03-16, 19:42 |
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Re: How to go to heaven.
MGCBTSOOYG
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#13
2007-03-16, 19:43 |
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Re: How to go to heaven.
Moving this piece of religious bullshit to MGCBTSOOYG.
And let me save you all of a great deal of bullshit. There is no heaven, hell or any other of that crap. So don't worry, you'll just die without any worries  |
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#14
2007-03-16, 20:00 |
double entendre
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Re: How to go to heaven.
quote:Originally posted by Siu 3d:
That's exactly what the priest told me right before he stuck his hand down my pants.
Actually, a Catholic priest would never say that. Justification by faith alone was not introduced until Martin Luther. It is the very philosophy that makes the Protestant faith what it is. A priest would say, "You can go to heaven if you confess all of your sins and that you are truly sorry for them, and then make penance for these sins"...
...And THEN stick his hand down your pants.
As mentioned, though, it's all a load of crap.
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