I know you probably don't know me, but I think it's about high time you made a dating/girl guide. I dunno why, but I felt compelled to let you know this. Stop letting nice guys tell people what to do with women! You're a mod, act like one!

Also, for anyone out there: Happy St. Patty's!

Agreed.

That would be a really good read.

Come on, 'Ketch, shower the masses in poon.

I think he wrote seduction in 69 steps if I remember right.

Wrong, sir, that was Trousersnake.

i agree.

I think that would be a good idea too. I love your writing style too =)

Especially considering Trousersnake's was dismissed outright.

The mighty Ketch's powers of seduction are based on intangible factors. They can't really be taught.

quote:Originally posted by Kyoki:

The mighty Ketch's powers of seduction are based on intangible factors. They can't really be taught.

Luckily intangible does not mean incomprehensible. Here is his secret: He is a sex GOD.

i have the faint feeling all jack will say is know and believe in yourself and if you do this to a large enough extent you'll be overrun by sexcrazy bitches

could be wrong though

why should Jack help us? That would be no fun at all for him and would cause alot less topics in totse. Jack will more then likely laugh at all you guys even more for being stupid pathetic humans. hahaha

Mojo, psycho,LC please leave this open...my E-cock needs some stroking. Thanks.

And to everyone else...if there is enough demand I will do it.

Yeah do it! We all worship you in here.

Go for it.

Sounds like a good idea to me...

You should write it using a big mechanical car metaphor. It would bring me lolz.

If you want to include illustrations, feel free to post it in HB and have me move it.

yes please

I'll add to the demand, yes.

honestly, who needs a dating guide? oh wait...

You don't need a fucking "guide". Just be yourself. If the girl doesn't like who you for yourself, then it wasn't meant to be.

quote:Originally posted by Can O Soup:

Luckily intangible does not mean incomprehensible. Here is his secret: He is a sex GOD.

http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m313/siash/Ketch.jpg

I'm more interested in a "tricks of the trade" guide. You know, none of that "coffee table bdsm crap"

I'm a chick but I'd read it... doooit. Too many clueless guys out there.

PLEASE write this, I have a feeling it'll be funny as hell.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Mojo, psycho,LC please leave this open...my E-cock needs some stroking. Thanks.

And to everyone else...if there is enough demand I will do it.

Enough demand? This is Sex and Affection! Judging by the high number of "I fucked up" threads, there is obviously a very high one. (otherwise they wouldnt be making em)

Sounds like a pretty stupid idea.

quote:Originally posted by Can O Soup:

He is a sex GOD.

He is more than that...much more...

quote:Originally posted by oc6:

He is more than that...much more...

You're telling me. I'm still tender.

Come on jack, I don't wanna spend the rest of my life jackin off.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Mojo, psycho,LC please leave this open...my E-cock needs some stroking. Thanks.

And to everyone else...if there is enough demand I will do it.

How 'bout your stroke my cock?

I've been thinking about this all day and i'm sorry to say I don't think i have the knowledge to write a 'dating guide'. I have never really been into the whole dating thang. Never seen the sense of it or had the need.

I could write a guide on how to get laid but I don't suppose anyone would want to read that....

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

I've been thinking about this all day and i'm sorry to say I don't think i have the knowledge to write a 'dating guide'. I have never really been into the whole dating thang. Never seen the sense of it or had the need.

I could write a guide on how to get laid but I don't suppose anyone would want to read that....

Your probably right. Who likes sex anyway?

We'll settle for that.

quote:Originally posted by grungekid:

Your probably right. Who likes sex anyway?

EXACTLY! All that stickyness, and wetness. The sheet washing and the hands smelling of latex for a day after....ewwww

And since DNA testing, disposing of bodies is a real bitch too.

1. Get in lots of street fights, if you survive this...

2. Start brushing your teeth in whiskey, only without a toothbrush

3. ???

4. Buttsecks!

1. Think really hard

2. Right sex guide

3. ???

4. PROFIT!

quote:Originally posted by Mr.Happy:

You're telling me. I'm still tender.

No wonder you're Mr. Happy.

*strokes jackketch's ego* . Sure, I'll be a good read no doubt.

Peace

Go for it x2

quote:Originally posted by Vamp:

I'm a chick but I'd read it... doooit. Too many clueless guys out there.

Where've you been, Vamp?

Well, what say you, 'ketch?

please make a guide on how to get laid

You guys are pathetic. And while I agree that Ketchian wisdom would be an amusing read, I feel that anything that can or would be said pertains to unconcious techniques involving body language, Ketch's personality as well as his level of experience, all sprinkled with the magic fairy dust of common sense. Here, I'll write you you're fucking sex guide:

1. Go outside.

2. Find women.

3. Speak to women.

4a. Get to know them.

4b. Alcohol/Narcotics.

5. Sex.

6. Profit.

bump

Do it..



Or ill waist space in this post!

common jack, just make one, you know there's enough us wantin it

i mean, you didn't make admin just by people whinin till you became on for nothin, that's a rare thing

quote:Originally posted by dark-easterbunny:

common jack, just make one, you know there's enough us wantin it

i mean, you didn't make admin just by people whinin till you became on for nothin, that's a rare thing

I made Admin??!

Maybe you should inform Zok of that fact...

admin, mod, it's all the same, all people who try to do a job and instead of people appreciatin it they just whine

Only difference is admins can ban. So what? bans can be avoided

Start writing, Ketch, you arn't getting off that easily.

Write or I send a hoard of ginger hookers to your house!

So, Jack... are you going to write a guide?

It'd probably be far more helpful and interesting to many people than your domestic diatribes.

quote:Originally posted by Durell:

So, Jack... are you going to write a guide?

It'd probably be far more helpful and interesting to many people than your domestic diatribes.

I'm thinking about whether or not I have anything really new or helpful to say on the subject.

On the subject of my domestic diatribes, they serve an important purpose.

You see, despite everyone's protests to the contrary, alarge majority of yous all will find yourselves parents within the next few years.

You may not believe that now, but it will happen.



[This message has been edited by jackketch (edited 03-24-2007).]

you don't have to have anything new to say. The problem is that most good stuff is hidden between bunches of crap in most posts. So just make one.....wich is...free of retardedness

Goddamnit, Ketch, write!

quote:Originally posted by Rocko:

Goddamnit, Ketch, write!

I AM seriously giving it thought but at the moment I also have an erotic story to write (my characters have ganged up on me and have gone on strike).

I also prefer to spend my online time pouring sweetness into oc6's ear.

Unlike a lot of you i am so not a writer by nature. It takes me ages just to form a coherent sentence in English (I think in German still a lot)....as you've probably noticed by my posts.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Unlike a lot of you i am so not a writer by nature.

You are a very good writer, even though you don't think so. You write with humour, creativity, and passion.

[...but I love it most...when you write for me... ]

<3

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

You see, despite everyone's protests to the contrary, alarge majority of yous all will find yourselves parents within the next few years.

I have a queasy feeling that I might already be in that situation in New York. On the positive side however, I'm now in eastern Europe... oh wait... it's kinda crap here.

ketch is kind of like a totse father figure. it would be like having your dad tell you how to go out and get some poon tang. i hope i didn't use too many americanisms in that.