totse.com | My God.

Captain Asshat · #1 2006-12-02, 01:48

My God is Harvey. He's a hippopotamus. He plays a magical harp made of many golden strings. He farts chocolate chips and lives in a magic kingdom filled with cotton candy clouds and rainbow streets. When I die and go to be with Harvey, we'll laugh and play games together and slide through huge piles of gum drops and all manner of things will be well.

404_error · #2 2006-12-02, 02:11

Good to see you don't only live in SG.

Rizzo in a box · #3 2006-12-02, 02:18

GTFO

[This message has been edited by Rizzo in a box (edited 12-02-2006).]

Raw_Power · #4 2006-12-02, 02:24

What's wrong with that baby's tongue?

Captain Asshat · #5 2006-12-02, 02:30

I don't see what's so bad about my post. Harvey is a God to many people. His creation might be a little different from your own, but he's peaceful. He's happy and he wants everyone else to be happy as well. That is the true meaning of God.

It's not the face or the name. It's the message.

Rizzo in a box · #6 2006-12-02, 02:50

Quote:

quote:Originally posted by Captain Asshat:

I don't see what's so bad about my post. Harvey is a God to many people. His creation might be a little different from your own, but he's peaceful. He's happy and he wants everyone else to be happy as well. That is the true meaning of God.

It's not the face or the name. It's the message.

Well, good on you then.

Hexadecimal · #7 2006-12-02, 02:51

Quote:

quote:Originally posted by Captain Asshat:

I don't see what's so bad about my post. Harvey is a God to many people. His creation might be a little different from your own, but he's peaceful. He's happy and he wants everyone else to be happy as well. That is the true meaning of God.

It's not the face or the name. It's the message.

I'm in agreement, actually. LOL

I'm glad you enjoy having fun...people take the whole God business WAY too serious.

Hazey · #8 2006-12-02, 06:11

Quote:

quote:Originally posted by Captain Asshat:

I don't see what's so bad about my post. Harvey is a God to many people. His creation might be a little different from your own, but he's peaceful. He's happy and he wants everyone else to be happy as well. That is the true meaning of God.

It's not the face or the name. It's the message.

fuck yeah, bro.

first time i've ever seen you post out of travelers..

Captain Asshat · #9 2006-12-03, 01:45

Today I had a serious discussion with another follower about Harvey. We both agree with Harvey's message.. peace, love, charity, and endless amounts of candy. However, my counterpart feels that Harvey does NOT, in fact, fart chocolate chips. He's also crazy enough to believe that Harvey plays the flute. I mean come on.. everyone KNOWS that Harvey plays a magical harp. This is absolutely outrageous, and cannot be taken in by any devout Harveyite.

I was even more shocked when my new acquaintance informed me that an entire Church of Harvey near here believes in this flute nonsense. I've consulted with my Church, and we've decided that the only possible course of action is to kill them.

AnAsTaSiO · #10 2006-12-03, 02:40

Quote:

quote:Originally posted by Captain Asshat:

Today I had a serious discussion with another follower about Harvey. We both agree with Harvey's message.. peace, love, charity, and endless amounts of candy. However, my counterpart feels that Harvey does NOT, in fact, fart chocolate chips. He's also crazy enough to believe that Harvey plays the flute. I mean come on.. everyone KNOWS that Harvey plays a magical harp. This is absolutely outrageous, and cannot be taken in by any devout Harveyite.

I was even more shocked when my new acquaintance informed me that an entire Church of Harvey near here believes in this flute nonsense. I've consulted with my Church, and we've decided that the only possible course of action is to kill them.

Interesting.

Is there a Book of Harveyness? Is it filled with contradictions, tales of murder and hate?

If so, I know another similar religion.