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| My God Can Beat the Shit Out of Your God For discussing any and all religious viewpoints. Intolerance will not be tolerated. Keeping your sense of humor is required. Posting messages about theological paradoxes is encouraged. |
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#1
 2005-08-31, 14:48
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WeaponsOMassIdiot 
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The Bible
The most I can think of the Bible is is a FICTIONAL book of moral stories, so think about this.
God does not want incest [sex with your own family], but if he only created Adam and Eve, and they had only a few kids, how are we here? Someone had to fuck there sister up the ass a couple of times. Can you say, Holy Blowjobs?
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#2
 2005-08-31, 22:25
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Lou Reed 
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Re: The Bible
Listen to "who by fire" by Leonard Cohen.
Its about you
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#3
 2005-08-31, 23:23
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awkword 
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Re: The Bible
Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.
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#4
 2005-08-31, 23:25
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Lou Reed 
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Re: The Bible
quote:Originally posted by awkword:
Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.
good one
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#5
 2005-09-01, 00:19
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Behind the boat house
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Re: The Bible
quote:Originally posted by Lou Reed:
Listen to "who by fire" by Leonard Cohen.
Its about you
I love you. Let's make babies.
Cheers,
Lost
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#6
 2005-09-01, 00:32
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Magnus_Ungermax 
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Re: The Bible
quote:Originally posted by WeaponsOMassIdiot:
The most I can think of the Bible is is a FICTIONAL book of moral stories, so think about this.
God does not want incest [sex with your own family], but if he only created Adam and Eve, and they had only a few kids, how are we here? Someone had to fuck there sister up the ass a couple of times. Can you say, Holy Blowjobs?
It saddens me to know my views are the same as yours. Thanks a fucking lot you just made someone christian
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#7
 2005-09-01, 02:10
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Christop 
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Re: The Bible
There wouldn't have been problems with incest then because there would have been extremely few genetic errors by that stage. If you read Genesis as history in the modern, literal, logical sense.
[This message has been edited by Christop (edited 09-01-2005).]
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#8
 2005-09-01, 02:39
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Re: The Bible
quote:Originally posted by awkword:
Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.
How's Your Shift Key Feeling?
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#9
 2005-09-01, 04:02
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Cancerous Cretin 
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Re: The Bible
the ikea catalogue just overtook the bible as the most printed book on earth
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#10
 2005-09-01, 06:13
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Lynne le Fay 
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Re: The Bible
Teehee.
If you accept "Adam" to mean "Man," and "Eve" to mean "Woman," it makes a hell of a lot more sense.
Considering that no one who wrote Genesis was actually there, they did a good enough job of copying down what was probably oral tradition. And by that I don't mean Holy Blowjobs, you sick fuck. No one gets pregnant that way unless you have a very strange vagina that doubles as you esophagus...what a fun disorder...
Moving on, there is evidence semi-proving some stories in the Bible.
Crudely you've stated why many Protestants only believe in the New Testament because the old is rife with sin. Big fat sin.
I'm wondering if you have actually read the Bible, seeing as you only know one of its more famous stories. Adam and Eve is a tamer story than most.
What of Lot after Sodom and Gamorra were destroyed? His daughters got him drunk so they could have sex with him and carry on his seed. Have fun getting away with that today.
Love and Sodomy,
Lynne
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#11
 2005-09-01, 11:47
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Darwinist 
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Re: The Bible
quote:Originally posted by Emperor:
How's Your Shift Key Feeling?
You just didn't get it.
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#12
 2005-09-01, 15:49
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Atomical 
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Re: The Bible
quote:Originally posted by Christop:
There wouldn't have been problems with incest then because there would have been extremely few genetic errors by that stage. If you read Genesis as history in the modern, literal, logical sense.
It's a myth that incest causes extreme mutations. It's part of the incest taboo.
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#13
 2005-09-01, 20:02
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Lou Reed 
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Re: The Bible
quote:Originally posted by LostCause:
I love you. Let's make babies.
Cheers,
Lost
Geeze, i'm stumped...
Thats an interesting proposition,
where are you?
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#14
 2005-09-01, 20:08
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Lou Reed 
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Re: The Bible
quote:Originally posted by WeaponsOMassIdiot:
Can you say, Holy Blowjobs?[/B]
i hope everyone laughs except WeaponsOMassIdiot: http://www.bilski.net/images/Humor/youdaman.jpg
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#15
 2005-09-01, 21:28
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Goat Saint 
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Re: The Bible
I didn't know Carlos Mencia was on totse!
Amazing!
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