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| My God Can Beat the Shit Out of Your God For discussing any and all religious viewpoints. Intolerance will not be tolerated. Keeping your sense of humor is required. Posting messages about theological paradoxes is encouraged. |
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# 1
2004-03-02, 22:09
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Regular
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Behind the boat house
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Who are your favorite characters in the Bible, aside from story and everything.
I'd have to say Gabriel is probably my favorite, because he's such a cool character. He's so trustworthy that he's allowed to hang out in hell, heaven, and earth and basically do whatever he wants.
Your turn.
Cheers,
Lost
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# 2
2004-03-02, 22:19
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David was pretty cool. He was a peeping tom, adulterer and murderer, but still a man after God's own heart...the slick bastard.
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# 3
2004-03-02, 22:19
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Regular
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Mass US EDIT NezPerce Indian Res.
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Either the Apple
(If you saw Eve coming at you, you'd be in a pretty good mood  )
or the bush.
That was a cool bush.
People walk by, they're like "Hey, bush
What's up bush? You want some water there, bush?"
Yeah, that bush was awesome.
He was really a kickass dude,
am I right, man?
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# 4
2004-03-02, 22:44
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i like lot whats better than getting raped by your own daughters
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# 5
2004-03-02, 22:52
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Quote:
quote:Originally posted by Phrensied Rabbits:
or the bush.
That was a cool bush.
People walk by, they're like "Hey, bush
What's up bush? You want some water there, bush?"
Yeah, that bush was awesome.
He was really a kickass dude,
am I right, man?
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That was just a man named Bush, if you go back to the original Hebrew. Apparently he rose from the dead and ran for President.
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# 6
2004-03-02, 23:20
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Regular
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Mass US EDIT NezPerce Indian Res.
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Quote:
quote:Originally posted by Easy Going:
That was just a man named Bush, if you go back to the original Hebrew. Apparently he rose from the dead and ran for President.
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nevermind...
I don't like the bush anymore...
what's the most mellow guy in there other than the bush?
and not a reed!
those guys aren't cool!
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# 7
2004-03-03, 01:21
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satan's pretty cool.
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# 8
2004-03-03, 02:07
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Regular
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The Shire, Michigan
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Judas! He got Jesus killed and now all our sins are forgiven! Of course now he's trapped in the ninth layer of hell in Satan's mouth, but ...
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# 9
2004-03-03, 02:14
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The men of Sodom... they are soooooo funny...
They see the angels visting Lot, and their like "hey pretty boys, come out here so we can fuck you in the street"
lmao. if they actually put a rating on the bible, it would be like R, with all the violence, sex, genocide, ect
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# 10
2004-03-03, 06:30
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Satan. God created it, and if god knows everything. Then it set up our sins. It put that "tree of knowledge" in the garden just to fuck with you. Or at least the old testament is bull.
I'm sorry i wouldn't promote any god that tells me to be stupid...
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#11
2004-03-03, 17:38 |
Phrensied Rabbits 
Regular
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 Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
Be stupid!
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#12
2004-03-03, 20:08 |
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Regular
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Wherever there's consciousness
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
I'd have to say god, he's like a pissed off kid who knows evrey thing, and can do anything.
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#13
2004-03-04, 02:30 |
the_karaite
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
Jeremiah!
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#14
2004-03-04, 04:20 |
kevinboyd
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
I think it's funny that no one is choosing jesus.
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#15
2004-03-04, 17:00 |
dizztrezzed
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
I liked Jesus when he went crazy and pwned all the money changers in the temple. He was so pissed, he stuffed lightning bolts up their asses and ruined their shit.  |
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#16
2004-03-04, 18:36 |
Joeb
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
In fact, Jesus coined the phrase "ruined their shit" 2000 years ago. But in Aramaic it shoulds like gibberish and the Bible has been translated so many times that we only recently rediscovered the phrase.
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#17
2004-03-04, 20:44 |
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Regular
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Behind the boat house
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
quote:Originally posted by dizztrezzed:
I liked Jesus when he went crazy and pwned all the money changers in the temple. He was so pissed, he stuffed lightning bolts up their asses and ruined their shit.
Yea, that was the coolest thing Jesus ever did.
Cheers,
Lost |
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#18
2004-03-05, 00:17 |
need4speed
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
I'd say Jesus, but I think the bible version today is incorrect, or might be so. It even might be a big lie.
I think Jesus existed, and I think he was a fucking aweseome guy that got killed by his own people, from which he revolted.
But thats about it.
I'm thinking alot about the jews lately, I'm especially concerned because all jews in the world started fearing anti-semettism(SP?) after that movie, by Mel Gibson was released.
I mean, its a bit early to start pointing fingers, before anything has ever happened? It would seem as though they had something special to protect. Especially considered there is about a thousand movies where christian/hebrew/mexican/whatever people kill other people in great quantities, without ever anyone noticing.
I also find it fingerlickingly exiting that we hear so much about ww2 and holocaust, and so very little about stalins massmurder of his own people, or the hiroshima bombing for that matter.
I'm not pointing any fingers, I just notice some things that pass me by, and I question it. (I'm not christian, or jew, or muslim or anything like that I might add. I do not believe in any religion at all I think, if you don't call my own one.)
I think what we read, see and hear today, may be EXTREMELY influenced by the fact that jews have been treated badly for some reason or another (justified or not), and that they feel bad for themselves. This resulting in us getting THEIR angle a LOT of the times, considering israels big buddy USA (atleast the GOV) produces about 75% of all information that reaches our brains.
About half of that is again directly related to 23 big firms in USA, wich means we are beeing programmed by very few people.
Now this might be bullshit, its merely hear-say, but I say: Think about it, it IS a possibility.
[This message has been edited by need4speed (edited 03-05-2004).]
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#19
2004-03-05, 19:42 |
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
Well God promised us a lot of stuff, so it means we get a lot of stuff. Simple as that.
And my favourite characters:
Pharoah (my nile is my own - the original agnostic)
Moses when he's playing games with Pharoah's sourcerors, because that's just amusing.
The Prophets - They just rule.
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#20
2004-03-07, 03:44 |
onion jack 67
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
my favorites characters in the bible are 'C', 'K', 'P' and 'T' but i am very fond of 'X' too
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#21
2004-03-07, 06:07 |
the_karaite
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
quote:Originally posted by kevinboyd:
I think it's funny that no one is choosing jesus.
I think it's smart
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#22
2004-03-07, 06:56 |
Keltoiberserker
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
Moses, Cain, David, and Solomon. I'd say JC but I think he was more of a rebellious type of guy who wanted massive change not the messiah/son of god. I'm not a Christian, Muslim, or Jewish but I was raised by Catholics and know more about the stuff that they do but not as much as a scholar.
[This message has been edited by Keltoiberserker (edited 03-07-2004).]
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#23
2004-03-18, 02:40 |
seraph~aral
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
solomon, he wrote so much stuff that i use today. plus he was a magician, but then again so was jesus. hmmm i wonder where he was for all those missing years...? (ahem...studying how to use his godly powers...ahem)
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#24
2004-03-18, 03:57 |
cunfoozedmunkee
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
Definately Lucifer. I'm sure he and I have much in common. But then again he's an ass. I really don't like anyone in the Bible. They were mostly suck ups to God. Except for Lucifer; however, he's still an ass.
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#25
2004-03-18, 07:53 |
Kia Kordestani
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
My favorite character in the Bible would have to be myself. The whole book is based on my teachings interpreted by prophets like Jesus from the past. Anyways If I cant choose myself (I know, I know, I'm coveting) it would have to be Moses (thats why he said that he knew God especialy favored him). Can anyone name a greater success story in the history of mankind? He was born as a baby destined to be killed then orphaned as a prince until he was exiled for murdering an Egyptian man in justice. Then he came back to rally all his people from the oppression of the Pharoah and moved the Jews into their new homeland in Israel.
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#26
2004-03-19, 02:30 |
Amazing
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
My favourite character in the bible would have to be Noah. He was favourited by God so much that God let him build his own boat and laugh at everyone who was drowning.
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#27
2004-03-19, 18:44 |
Armed&Angry
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
Favorite character? Gotta be the angel Michael, The Dragonslayer. Nothing says badass like a flaming sword.
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#28
2004-03-23, 05:44 |
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
I like Samson.
He was so strong he could push down a building! WOW!
And he tied foxes together and set their tails on fire! KEWL!
And he was only strong because he had long hair! WTF?!?
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#29
2004-03-24, 02:53 |
exesept
Regular
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Re: Favorite Characters In The Bible
Jesus =) If he was a hacker he'd pwn j00 455z0rz.
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