This dog has been around since I moved here and it's really annoying because it's allways shiting in my yard and digging holes so when I come home late at night, I bust my ass in these huge holes. What if I poisoned it? How much do you think I should use and how should I do it? Drano Max and meat? Chocolate?

[This message has been edited by cramatic (edited 08-13-2003).]

Clean the shit up, then tell your neighbor about his dog. Tell him if he comes on your property again and lays his dung, you will call Animal Control.

If that does no help, just leave a small peice of slightly cooked meat in your yard and put some rat poison in it. If it were me, I would spray with some generic oven cleaner. That shit is very strong and stays on whatever it is your spayed it on for up to a day. Then again...Raid claims to keep killing for weeks, so its possible that if you spray the meat with that, the poison could get in his body and he would be very sick for a long time, or die.

Just a few ideas.

First of all, killing someone's pet is probably the definition of "Bad Idea." Never do it.

What you want to do is talk to the guy about it, and tell him to keep his dog of your lawn. Tell him that the next time his dog messes with your property you'll call Animal Control and/or the cops. Tell him that you'll do the same if it happens again after that. Tell him that if it happens a third time, you'll carry out Muramune's idea.

Animal control won't do anything because they say it's a "small case". I've talked to him about it and he put the dog in it's fence but it keeps getting out anyway. I thought about paintballing the shit out of it so it would be too scared to come near my house.

Don't use a PB gun. He'll just run away when he sees you, or he'll only stay away for a little while. In addition, the owner will obviously see the paint and bruises on his dog and will take one of two reactions.

1)He'll be smart and take more precautions to secure his dog in his own yard, where he is safe.

2) He'll get angry and take precautions to catch you in the act, and call the cops or he'll be suspicious of you and go straight to you about it, forcing you to lay low. Then you can't do shit.

I suggest you call animal control again and tell you the dog is now sleeping in your yard. tell him you don't know this dog and now you're scared to go outside. They have to do something about that, especially if the owner isn't.

Dog is a tasty treat. Sneak up on dog.Cut off its head fast with a Big heavy knife.This is a very human way to kill.The dog will never feel pain and he will be kosher.As this is the prefered method for kosher butchers.Then skin it.Cut as you would a pig or cow on a different scale.Salt and pepper to tast.Flame up that grill and prepare for a tasty treat.Invite your neighbor for a this taste delight and he will forgive you and be your best friend.

To be kosher, the animal's throat has to be slit, and it has to bleed out slowly. I also think a rabbi has to do it.

if the guy has kids, and its a family pet definitly do not kill it. if its like a hunting dog or some shit just go with the above plans.

Well if you are going to kill it make it look like an accident. Like accidently leave a bucket full of antifreeze coolant next to your garage. Coolant is very sweet tasting(high toxic) and the dog should be drawn to the sweet smell and drink it. Instant accident which caused a rather untimely death to your neighbors dog

[This message has been edited by weasel (edited 08-14-2003).]

Weasel's right, that would probably be easiest.

Those are all stupid fucking ideas, do you think the dog wont bark when (s)he see's you? And even if you do shoot it, or stab it, then it's going to yelp.

Dog is a tasty treat. Sneak up on dog.Slit its throat and cut off its head fast with a Big heavy knife.This is a very human way to kill.The dog will never feel pain and he will be almost kosher.As this is the prefered method for kosher butchers.Then skin it.Cut as you would a pig or cow on a different scale.Salt and pepper to taste.Flame up that grill and prepare for a tasty treat.Invite your neighbor for this taste delight and he will forgive you and be your best friend. You guys are so discriminating damn.

I gotta solution!!

I did this when my neibhors that live about 130 yards from me that live down the way there 2 rotwhilers killed my kittin Crash

i took 2 small *btw befoer i forget i need to accredit this to the Hayduke Manual* i took 2 small 2x2 sponged and got up one morning after cuttign them up and fixed my self a lovely breakfast Bacon eggs sasuages Pancakes and the works but i kept my bacon grease and heated the grease back up and soaked my lil sponges in them and removed them after about 40 seconds of dipping them in and out of the grease and let them sit for about a half hour then i went for a brisk walk to burn off the calories i had eaten down the canal and fed Mutly and his Bitch the Bacon flavored sponges

Well when i went on my rounds the day after next day i took total joy and disbelife in the 2 poor bastards rolling around with there Stomachs swelled up and moaning i came back 2 days later and there was a little cross in the yard with *Suzie* on it and the other dog was still there with a few stiches on its side and so with that i went home in complete anger.

I came back 1 weeks later andlet my self in there backyard with there little gate convenantily placed out back and approached the dog with....... can u guess? Yes none other than a Screwdrive and proceded to jam it through its chest 2 times and through each of its eyes next day no dog and havent seen em there since ! SO use the sponge it blocks them up like a pound of goverment cheese to a human does just leav em in the yard or throw them to him

That is a nice fucking idea.