Im probably not even going to try. I guess i just cant get the thought out of my head. Ive suffered from depression for a little over 6 years now on and off. No im not emo, im a normal guy who just is weak minded at times.

I cant buy alcohol legally sooo im kind of stuck unless i ask someone. Im 18, im lonely and everyone i used to go to for problems is gone now.I used to go to her to talk out my problems. Now i cant and i feel kind of stuck and hopeless.

Im asking you guys as a last resort to help me out. I dont want to listen to music because it doesnt help. Doing drugs makes it worse, but i havent tried drinking yet. I could be a bitch and pop like a few prescribed pills to knock my ass out.

This shit is like a tease. Now i see why a lot of the guys on here treat women like shit. They never had a girlfriend or the girlfriend(s) they had fucked them up inside.

We'll see what i'll really do on march 31st.

I can seriously use a friend right now. But i feel i lost most of them.

xanax + weed + avanza. Cures depression.

or...

Get back with her.

Hey Jvm. Aw...man dont lose your grip bud. Relax, take a moment, breathe, and feel around you for all the things you should be thankful for. No man, alcohol wont help you. It seriously wont.

After a breakup theres always that while where you cant do shit for yourself and everything is meaningless but youve got to hang in there. This world has a lot to offer you as you have a lot to offer this world and something silly and pointless like suicide is just a wasteful cop out. Youre better than that shit.

I've seen youre posts and you are definitely one of the better memebers around here. Keep it up, your totse family is here for you man. Now prepare for the flames...

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

xanax + weed + avanza. Cures depression.

or...

Get back with her.

At the moment she wants a 'break' and wants to be friends. Funny thing is, we do the same things we used to do without the girlfriend/boyfriend stuff... its like a goddamn tease. I want her back because the breakup was because of stupid shit. It just hurts really bad.

Dude, in the end, everything is a gag. Don't worry to much, take a few deep breathes, if you really feel you need to call a local hotline or something.

Don't worry, eighteen is a hard ass age, just hold on until it gets better.

Look a good neighbor, Totse is there (In the tune of 'Like a good neighbor, statefarm is there')

what do you mean those people are gone? if they're physically far away. Give them a call. call up family. Everyone. You'd be suprised how much people actually care about you. I was in a very similar situation a year and a bit back, stuck in a small town and the only person I ever talked to was my girlfriend.

It's because of some one else.

First and foremost: Don't !

Just Do Not Do It.

Maybe you think that it'll make everything better for everyone, but it won't. If you do, you will feel no more pain, but if you think it will make anyone around you feel better, you are dead wrong (pun intended).

BUT

If you do decide to take that trip to the other side... please be somewhat considerate of those you will be leaving behind. Please do them a favor by doing it correctly. If you OD, take much more than you think will be enough to do the trick. If you cut your wrists, be sure to cut deeply and make the slits lengthwise and not across them. If you prefer a firearm, pick a good 12 gauge 00 buckshot or a pistol that will strike the base of your skull.

Nothing is worse than trying to deal with a suicide attempt that failed.

Oh, and please, by all means, if you are going to use one of the 'messy' means, do it outside in the back yard or someplace like that. No need to have your loved ones deal with scraping brain parts off of the walls or mopping blood off of the floor.

It will be bad enough for them to have to deal with your passing without spending the next few days thumbing through the Yellow Pages for cleaning services.

I hope you live long enough to respond to this post. If not... RIP

Suck it up and stop being a pussy. I'm not even joking. When ever I feel depressed I say this to myself and believe it or not it helps.

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

It's because of some one else.

care to explain?

If it is truly over for good rid yourself of anything she's left behind. Get out of the house and do something fun. Don't sit and ponder what she's doing or what could've been.

If she calls don't answer, pay her no mind.

She will become an obsession if you continue like this.

quote:Originally posted by KriminalMinded:

If it is truly over for good rid yourself of anything she's left behind. Get out of the house and do something fun. Don't sit and ponder what she's doing or what could've been.

If she calls don't answer, pay her no mind.

She will become an obsession if you continue like this.

Yeah i was thinking that couldbe the problem. The only thing is, a part of me has hope she'll be back eventually. Apart of me wishes we werent dating for so long so it wouldnt be this hard.

If worst really does come to worst....

Always remember:

Murder/Suicide > Suicide.....

I know how you feel. I can't say I feel exactly as you, because no one is the same, but I am in a very similar situation.

Saying 'don't kill yourself man' may just seem hollow, but even though it seems very nice to just can it right now, you are 18. There are people who do care about you, and everyone who is left will second guess their own decisions and feel they have your blood on their hands. I know it seems like it's so easy to do, and how bad this is right now, but for the sake of others you have to fight through it.

Does it seem like you're the only one who knows what love is? Maybe you don't want to leave her because you care for her, even though she has screwed you over in every sense. Accept that everyone is not rational... everybody makes mistakes. Some, more than others. Hindsight is always 20/20 though. Just keep doing what you are doing, do not give the world the satisfaction of breaking into a cold person. Give someone a reason to live.

If you have msn and want to chat, I would be more than happy to. Up for that?

quote:Originally posted by Swany:

I know how you feel. I can't say I feel exactly as you, because no one is the same, but I am in a very similar situation.

Saying 'don't kill yourself man' may just seem hollow, but even though it seems very nice to just can it right now, you are 18. There are people who do care about you, and everyone who is left will second guess their own decisions and feel they have your blood on their hands. I know it seems like it's so easy to do, and how bad this is right now, but for the sake of others you have to fight through it.

Does it seem like you're the only one who knows what love is? Maybe you don't want to leave her because you care for her, even though she has screwed you over in every sense. Accept that everyone is not rational... everybody makes mistakes. Some, more than others. Hindsight is always 20/20 though. Just keep doing what you are doing, do not give the world the satisfaction of breaking into a cold person. Give someone a reason to live.

If you have msn and want to chat, I would be more than happy to. Up for that?

sure jvm222@hotmail.com

The BEST cure for what you have is a replacement. Find another chick. I know that is so easy for me to say sitting here in my easy fucking chair 3000 miles away.

Now if you are walking around all depressed and shit, chicks will pick up on it and not want to be around you. So you need to FAKE it. It is a state of mind.

Now we have all been heart broken before. Look at it like this, you are going through ONE of the many experiences of life. You need to get experience at life experiences.

You really need to pull your self out of this destructive state of mind you have fallen into. If you can just be positive you'll find another squeeze and everything will be okay.

Yes, I was going to ask how long you'd been together, the longer the harder. My last girlfriend was with me for 2 years and we'd been friends for nearly four.

You wake up one day and you have to get over two years. Not easy at all.

Now I remember why I stopped coming to S/A. Too many 14 year olds screaming suicide just because they had a break up. Thanks for reminding me

quote:Originally posted by gmail:

Now I remember why I stopped coming to S/A. Too many 14 year olds screaming suicide just because they had a break up. Thanks for reminding me





QFT.

Yes depression is not something that is spoken of lightly . Dont make it seem easier than it is . There is misery. Depression is different.

quote:Originally posted by gmail:

Now I remember why I stopped coming to S/A. Too many 14 year olds screaming suicide just because they had a break up. Thanks for reminding me



It's more a statement on how isolated and communityless people are now days than an "OMG I BROKE UP WITH MY GF" type thing, you know what I mean? Breaking up with a girl you love always sucks but it's the fact this guy is all alone that's really the killer.

quote:Originally posted by jvm222:

care to explain?

Breaks quite often mean "I've met some one else, but I think you deserve more than to be cheated on. So we're going to take a break, if this guy's better than you, it's for good, if I regret my decision, I'll get back with you"

Something along those lines. I wont guarantee it, but I think there's another guy.

Man SA is a sissy forum.

I expected threads about sex and fucking people, not sissy relationships.

Anyway, I know how you feel man

quote:Originally posted by gmail:

Now I remember why I stopped coming to S/A. Too many 14 year olds screaming suicide just because they had a break up. Thanks for reminding me



I never was screaming suicide , thanks asshole. I said ive been thinking about the thought of suicide. As in its been popping in my mind. Will i do it? Fuck no probably not.

Being diagnosed with depression when i was about 12 never had anything to do about girlfriends or relationships. I really dont mind if you make fun of me or talk shit because you've either never been in a relationship or a girl has hurt you in the past.

Anyways thanks for the help. Yeah im kind of depressed but no i dont feel like wasting my time finding ways to die lol.

And arquin theres no new guy If there was i would know and then i would kill him.

Well dude, i was in your position a few months ago. I'm a lot better now. I'm schizophrenic and slightly insane, but a lot better. Don't turn to drugs. They'll fuck you up worse than you can imagine. You find freinds in the oddest places. I've added you on msn if you want to talk. (wuckfit@hotmail.co.uk)

Please, please kill yourself, you fucking dipshit.

quote:Originally posted by Rocko:

Please, please kill yourself, you fucking dipshit.

I dont take orders from 13 year olds.

Sorry small balls.

Please do some jumping jacks and a handstand.

Then, feel better. Life will move on, just give it time.

quote:Originally posted by jvm222:

At the moment she wants a 'break' and wants to be friends. Funny thing is, we do the same things we used to do without the girlfriend/boyfriend stuff... its like a goddamn tease. I want her back because the breakup was because of stupid shit. It just hurts really bad.

That is the EXACT same situation I am in. After 4 years she says she wants a break and needs space but still wants to be friends with me...like she will still come over and stuff just not really do anything. And of course I can't stop thinking about her and it's killing me. I get the feeling she's just trying to let me down easier or something and it sucks. It really really sucks.

As much as you want to be depressed it's so much easier if you just try to not talk to her as much and not see her until she comes to her senses and wants to get back together...hopefully.

quote:Originally posted by jvm222:

I dont take orders from 13 year olds.

Sorry small balls.

Ah, I forgot, you take orders from 12-year-olds, not 18-year-olds who can clearly see that you're an angsty loser that knows absolutely nothing about life.

That's what you get for becoming too attached.

Anyways, I find that music seems to make things better.

quote:Originally posted by Rocko:

Ah, I forgot, you take orders from 12-year-olds, not 18-year-olds who can clearly see that you're an angsty loser that knows absolutely nothing about life.

You always seem to make me smile

Suicide is definitely not the way. I tried and now I have the scars to remind me everyday how much she screwed me up, and that honestly hurts even more. Plus I have perm. nerve damage in my left arm, so my mobility in my wrist is more limited, and causes me pain and weird "tight" feelings when I type.

So everytime I get on my computer I'm pretty much forced to think about her. Its not worth it.

Alcohol helps me dull some of the pain and get me through my day, but in the bottom of that bottle/can she is still there.

And even though I am sort of talking with another girl now, I have to be sure to keep my scars covered because I'm not ready to talk to her about all of that yet. And that constantly makes me think about my ex even when I'm happy with this new girl.

quote:Originally posted by jvm222:

You always seem to make me smile

Well I'm not the one about to murder/suicide because I broke up with someone.

not so helpfull advice

http://tinyurl.com/3depr6

dont do it. its not you're time yet.

quote:Originally posted by Rocko:

Well I'm not the one about to murder/suicide because I broke up with someone.

Rocko, just shut your fucking mouth. Just because you've never been with a person of the opposite sex, nor one of the same, doesn't give you the right to come in here and harass a man who is trying to hold a decent conversation.

Anyway, jvm, I know it sucks man, but seriously the only thing you should do is just try your best to get over her. I hate to break it, but from what I've seen and experienced, 99.9% of "breaks" don't work, and just usually end with a break up, so don't be surprised if it happens.

Someone in here suggested that you find someone else, and I think that would help, but might not be the final solution. The only real solution to this is to wait it out. Eventually, you'll get over her and realize you can get along by yourself. Like the cliche saying goes, there's other fish in the sea.

But by all means, suicide is not the way out of your current hell hole state. Just ride it out. Find something to occupy yourself you with, to get your mind off of this whole situation. I know it's hard, but it can be done.

Sorry I couldn't really add anything new to the thread, but there you go.

Suicide is selfish, but remember: http://tinyurl.com/qe2m8

Alcohol will just make it worse. Alcohol is a depressant. I'm 18 and life seems weird and confusing, but it's okay. You'll find another girl soon enough.

It's tough to make new friends, but you gotta try. I really don't feel like telling you not to do it because I don't think you need it. You still got a lot of years left.

Hey he didn't order he asked nicely.

Just kiddin', I kinda went through something similar when I was 14. I was just lonely, really, and somewhat isolated. I would really really recommend going to a psychologist. Not a psychiatrist, as they'll just pump you full of drugs. It's nice to have an interactive wall to talk to, at least for me it was. I also started lifting and getting really vain. I think that may have just masked the problems I had, but gaining 60-70 pounds of muscle helped the loneliness in a shallow sort of way.

Bunch of whiney fucking bitches in here. Jesus fucking christ. You hang out with her after you've broken up. That is your first problem. She isn't your fucking friend, obviously she hurt you, and she doesn't understand that. Make her understand by either killing her, torturing her, or not talking to her. Whatever is easier for your coward ass.

quote:Originally posted by Friendly Hater:

Rocko, just shut your fucking mouth. Just because you've never been with a person of the opposite sex, nor one of the same, doesn't give you the right to come in here and harass a man who is trying to hold a decent conversation.



Wow, apparently you haven't seen this guy post over in SG, he is the embodiment of all that is moronic.

JVM, what I said before doesn't change. I hate to see fellow men go through this experience, and having been there in the past means that I can relate to the emotions that are holding you hostage. Those same thoughts, even the one's about taking your own life, were my thoughts once.

I do not claim to be wise, at least not moreso than anyone else. But it has been months since I was where you are right now, and I am still alive. I may not be the same man I once was, may not enjoy the little things as much as I used to and may not see life through the same optimistic landscape; however, I am alive, full of the joy that waking up everyday brings. To say "do not take your life" would be largely hypocritical of me; I do not know your situation, so again I confess that I can tell you nothing with certainy and without judgement. But I will tell you this:

No women is worth your life. In fact, nothing in life is worth life itself. Because if you die today, you will never realize what new experiences or new majesties or new joys life with bequeath you with. And the uncertainty of tomorrow, as terrifying as it may seem right now, is the most precious thing you have. If you die today, you will never know what could have been, and depending on your beliefs, you may regret that for a very, very long time.

Once more, I am no saint, and nor am I in any way qualified to tell you what to do. But I am a man, just another human who's been there and done that and wants to tell you that things get better. Life goes on, people change and so do you. Good luck, my friend.

Opus

quote:Originally posted by Rocko:

Wow, apparently you haven't seen this guy post over in SG, he is the embodiment of all that is moronic.

Sg is my way of saying i dont give a fuck about how i act because it has no serious discussion.

So dont fucking judge me on my posts in a forum i havent steadily posted in for the past 4 months.

And carbonb yeah i know. But dont call me a coward. And i never said i was going to fucking kill myself or anyone. I just said ive been having thoughts about death.

Anyways thanks to some of you for making me feel better.

I doubt that you were diagnosed with depression at age twelve. Not being rude . Maybe you are really unhappy. But you arent meant to be diagnosed untill you are 18 or something because the mind hasn't fully developed yet.

Sure you could have had diffiuclties and a therapist but at 12 you dont get depression. I mean its not like they could give you prozac is it? .



Although saying that i bet the thread starter is american which probably explains it ...

suicide is never an answer, you know that right

and don't think i dunno how ya feel, i've been on and off depression since i was 15 (yes, i'm one of the rare not 12 year old totsonians)

I went to the most devestatin breakup i could imagine in the past year

lost my best friend

lost family

And still i look at things on the brightside

and bout friends......look up the old ones, all of 'm, even among those you think you lossed, or never maybe even saw as the closest of friends, i'm sure you'll find someone who understands. And i konw this is hard. But life is hard and always gonna be, better start learnin how to cope iwth that

quote:Originally posted by gmail:

Now I remember why I stopped coming to S/A. Too many 14 year olds screaming suicide just because they had a break up. Thanks for reminding me

quote:Originally posted by inverted:

I doubt that you were diagnosed with depression at age twelve. Not being rude . Maybe you are really unhappy. But you arent meant to be diagnosed untill you are 18 or something because the mind hasn't fully developed yet.

Sure you could have had diffiuclties and a therapist but at 12 you dont get depression. I mean its not like they could give you prozac is it? .



Although saying that i bet the thread starter is american which probably explains it ...

At age 12 i was diagnosed with depression and put on zoloft. Like i said, its been on and off since then. Sure i wouldnt believe it myself these days if some 12 year old told me they were depressed. I was told i was depressed. Honestly it was when i was younger when i was diagnosed with severe depression and i never been that depressed since. But depression isnt curable until you die.

Oh my god, if you are thinking of suicide over a single fucking girl, then you're clearly extremely weak. And you were diagnosed with depression when you were 12? I guess you don't have very good genes, please don't ever breed.

Just listen to Bob Marley. Whenever I'm feeling down, I just listen to some of that and it cheers me up.

holy shit dude.

i think you know i can relate to you about the suicide thoughts.

advice? i haven't been badly hurt by a guy. however, i have felt betrayed by people, abandoned, hurt - although they weren't love interests. the easiest way to bounce back from that kind of thing is by having other people in your life, or if you don't, having an identity and life that you like and are okay with. having high self esteem. it's not something i've yet mastered, but there is evidence of it in the world around us.

i know we haven't talked in a while, but i still care about what goes on in your life and how you are doing. i would like to talk if you want to.

its obvious that you feel like a wreck and all but if you were really weakminded it would already be over.

you are strong. confused yes, but strong.

there's a reason it's called going through hell, because if you keep going you come out the other side.

You weren't like this when you two met. You were probably happy. you have two choices: you can get her back or get over her. either way you need to become a better person to do either. Start finishing all the homework, start kicking ass at your job, and start working out. Start depending on yourself for your happiness. you've become so in love and attached that you forget how to do that. If she saw you tomorrow and you were a mess she wouldnt date you. Pull it together and start kicking ass at life again. my aim is abecker1313 leave me a msg and i'll get back to you. best luck dood.

quote:Originally posted by TheGhost:

Just listen to Bob Marley. Whenever I'm feeling down, I just listen to some of that and it cheers me up.

Cheer up my brothers, cheer up my sisters, cheer up my mama too, lord.

Anyway, you're just young and your hormones are pulling you in all different directions. As times wears on, you'll find your place. Weed is probably better for your case than booze is but other than drugs, I'd suggest a 2 week+ REAL camping trip alone with your closest friend. You can really find yourself doing this.

If you decide to do it, make sure to kill HER first.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

holy shit dude.

i think you know i can relate to you about the suicide thoughts.

advice? i haven't been badly hurt by a guy. however, i have felt betrayed by people, abandoned, hurt - although they weren't love interests. the easiest way to bounce back from that kind of thing is by having other people in your life, or if you don't, having an identity and life that you like and are okay with. having high self esteem. it's not something i've yet mastered, but there is evidence of it in the world around us.

i know we haven't talked in a while, but i still care about what goes on in your life and how you are doing. i would like to talk if you want to.

Yeah im sorry about just kind of out of no where not talking to you. IF you want my cell just go on aim sometime. I forgot where i wrote yours down.

quote:Originally posted by suissemista:

Oh my god, if you are thinking of suicide over a single fucking girl, then you're clearly extremely weak. And you were diagnosed with depression when you were 12? I guess you don't have very good genes, please don't ever breed.



A few tramatic things happened to me when i was 12. Until then i was fine.

Has nothing to do with molestation or some kind of abuse if anyone was thinking it.



[This message has been edited by jvm222 (edited 03-10-2007).]

I believe in you man... You can do it... Pills, have fun before doing it rape her tham kill her then kill yourself take your friends with you. You don't want be loney after your dead now.

I GUARANTY ALL PROBLEMS WILL GO AWAY WHEN YOUR

DEAD