So, my girlfriend of 6 months (I'm almost 16, she's 15) called me an hour ago and said that we've been drifting apart, and she wants to take a break. She says (and I have also noticed) that we do and say the same things, and our relationship is too repetitive.

We still love each other, and hopefully by taking a break it will save our relationship. She says that I am free to date other people, but I don't want to. I love her.

What are my odds for saving this relationship?

lol you're fucked

None right now. No chance.

Two things are going to happen. She's going to date somebody else, and be with him for a long time, and you are going to be forgotten, OR, she is going to date someone, and they are going to break up, and she's gunna come crawling back to you. I wouldn't accept her if she does, but that's up to you.



For next time, try to make sure your relationship doesn't get too repetitive. Don't try and save this one, and don't come out as pathetic. Be cool about it.



Read, know, do

quote:Originally posted by pepper23:

What are my odds for saving this relationship?

Almost zilch.

If she tells you that it is okay to date other girls, than this is her saying that she wants to date other men.

If she says that, than you can be absolutely certain that she means that she already has a guy in mind that she wants to fuck that is more exciting, attractive, or wealthier than you.

/thread

I only saw her a couple times a week, but I talked to her for about an hour on average every day...

Was it the long phone chats that caused the repetitiveness?

It could have been the fact that you only saw her a couple times a week.

quote:Originally posted by Byss:

Almost zilch.

If she tells you that it is okay to date other girls, than this is her saying that she wants to date other men.

If she says that, than you can be absolutely certain that she means that she already has a guy in mind that she wants to fuck that is more exciting, attractive, or wealthier than you.

/thread

more than likely QFT

"taking a break" almost always = breaking up.

almost always? i think it means always - my friend's gf said she 'needed a break for just a month', its been a year with her new guy that she picked up the day she signed up for the break

Break up with her now. I'd be better for both of you than the "easy" break up she's attempting through the break.

Sorry man.

-F☺rd

quote:Originally posted by BlitzSpade:

almost always? i think it means always - my friend's gf said she 'needed a break for just a month', its been a year with her new guy that she picked up the day she signed up for the break

i know of people who have gotten back together after breaks, so while i agree that pretty much if you get "we need a break" you're done for, i can't really generalize.

Basically, there's a problem with your relationship that obviously bothers her a lot more than it does you.

Rather than talk to you and try to work out said problem, she has suggested a 'break'.

My bet's on sneaky break-up plan.

Jx

And did anyone go on 'breaks' before Friends?

Jx

I recommend telling her to shove her break up her cunt. Tell her you're either together and are going to work on things or its over. This will up your manly points.

For once, everyone's right. Smart people have invaded SA. I like it.

Just to reiterate, your chances of saving this relationship, barring a miracle, are zero.

More so if the thought of her eloping with other guys (which she most definitely will) makes you cringe, or sigh sadly.

quote:Originally posted by Jessic:

And did anyone go on 'breaks' before Friends?

Jx

You're showing your age, kid.

lol dumstardz

But seriously it just means that she is sick of you. So don't bother

Seeings though you dont seem like you have much of an idea at all about what is happening, i'm going to take a wild guess and assume that you dont have very well communication. Or you would both know how you're feeling and why. Another thing is, maybe you're not spontaneous enough?

Maybe you should be doing things more on the spur of the moment. Perhaps you should be more out there, without changing yourself. But, "Taking a break" generally is breaking up, in a cowardly manner, and as for saying you're welcome to date other girls.... Certainly tells you about her commitment.

Also, can you elaborate on becoming repetative? What is it she's said is repetatve, why she says these things.... etc.

When my gf said she wanted a break i asked if we were gonna get back together and she of course says yes...3 days later i find out shes chillin with her ex again so i told her to get the fuck outa my life (btw almost same situation you're in, shes 15 n im 16 fell in love blah blah, anyway just call it off man its done dont wait around)

I was in a very similar situation, except we didn't "take a break". After dating for 11months, we broke up and almost immediately she started dating one of my best friends.

Three months down the track, she breaks up with him and we're back together a week later. It's gone quite successfully so far, so a break isn't always a bad thing.

Taking a break is code for "we're broken up, but I don't really want to look like a bitch, so we'll do this before I give you a 'let's just be friends' speach".

There is only one way to save your relationship.

1. Break off all contact with her.

Delete her number, email, whatever it takes so that you won't contact her.

2. Should she confront you, everything is fine, in fact it couldn't be better. You've changed. Living well is the best revenge, it also makes you more desirable.

3. When you see her after a month of having not contacted her, assess the situation and tell her you're going to take her out. Make your intentions clear, kiss her.

Oh I'm taking a break. Taking a break from immature girls and their bullshit. Next bitch that looks at me weird gets a an uppercut to the cervix.

My gf and I pulled a six month break and got back together afterwards...and things are okay. I mean, I was the one to initiate the break, and she was all torn up about it. I told her that she could date other guys, and whatnot, but she of course said that she wouldn't. I basically had no intention on contacting her (life was pretty good without a gf!), but I'm a man of my word, and I did. She had seen other people, but I didn't. We're together now, but not without our problems. You see, she lives in a different sate, so things are kinda hard.

pepper23, I say just let her have the break for whatever length of time agreed upon. During that time, think about whether you really want to be back with her or not. You don't have to see other people if you don't want to. When the time comes for the 'assessment', let her know exactly how you feel, and take it from there.

Keep us updated...and good luck.

Force your opinion on her. Tell her basically you think "a break" is complete bullshitand that it's just a way for her to see other guys without it being considered cheating. My girlfriend did the same thing awhile ago. I told her if she wants a break there is no chance of us getting back together, cuz in my mind it's the same as a break up.

So tell her what you think down to the finest detail about a break. If you can make her feel exactly how you feel about it. Keep us updated

quote:Originally posted by pepper23:

So, my girlfriend of 6 months (I'm almost 16, she's 15) called me an hour ago and said that we've been drifting apart, and she wants to take a break. She says (and I have also noticed) that we do and say the same things, and our relationship is too repetitive.

We still love each other, and hopefully by taking a break it will save our relationship. She says that I am free to date other people, but I don't want to. I love her.

What are my odds for saving this relationship?

i always see this as a girl trying to fuck another man personally.. usually you got to set up rules.. for stuff you dont want her to do.. i mean if you know you can trust her 100% and shes not permiscuius..

Ok, so I talked to her today and she said it was a bad idea in the first place.

All in all: We are happy, and all of those people who said she was fucking other guys were wrong.

quote:Originally posted by pepper23:

Ok, so I talked to her today and she said it was a bad idea in the first place.

All in all: We are happy, and all of those people who said she was fucking other guys were wrong.

Just wait. She'll break it off again. And again. And again. Free yourself from the cycle. Is she the one?

Then why are you with her?

Meaning that she can say whatever the hell she wants and you'll follow it. I'm seeing slight manipulation here, she pretty much thought about breaking up with you, was going to do it... but now she's changed her mind.



Weak.

Now tell her you've changed your mind and want to take a break after all. It's the ultimate power play. She'll either freak out over being rejected or be cool with it. Either way you're better off. Don't let her talk you out of it though. Tell her you need some time to think and then spend some conspicuous time with other attractive women. Have air tight verifiably evidence that it was innocent for if she confronts you about it. Then act indignant and lay on a guilt trip with your evidence. "We were planning your birthday party you paranoid idiot!" SELL IT. Then say you were planning on staying with her but you're not sure if you can be with someone who is so insecure.

Put that bitch on the defensive bro.

Then stop calling her, show up, fuck her then leave to do something exciting like race cars and subtly let her know it. "I'm meeting up with some people. No baby, I couldn't live with myself if you got hurt." Brush her off. Then take her out for ice cream the next day and be charming, if she asked you what happened, kill the subject.

Fuck her more. Call her less. Only emotionally connect with her enough to pacify her between shutouts, and attraction building. Be fucking subtle though. Actually find something to lie about because if you're making it all up they'll smell the poser a mile away.

quote:Originally posted by OdayJuarez:

Now tell her you've changed your mind and want to take a break after all. It's the ultimate power play. She'll either freak out over being rejected or be cool with it. Either way you're better off. Don't let her talk you out of it though. Tell her you need some time to think and then spend some conspicuous time with other attractive women. Have air tight verifiably evidence that it was innocent for if she confronts you about it. Then act indignant and lay on a guilt trip with your evidence. "We were planning your birthday party you paranoid idiot!" SELL IT. Then say you were planning on staying with her but you're not sure if you can be with someone who is so insecure.

Put that bitch on the defensive bro.

Then stop calling her, show up, fuck her then leave to do something exciting like race cars and subtly let her know it. "I'm meeting up with some people. No baby, I couldn't live with myself if you got hurt." Brush her off. Then take her out for ice cream the next day and be charming, if she asked you what happened, kill the subject.

Fuck her more. Call her less. Only emotionally connect with her enough to pacify her between shutouts, and attraction building. Be fucking subtle though. Actually find something to lie about because if you're making it all up they'll smell the poser a mile away.

Were you born a woman?

^^^^^

That sounds like an evil plan to get a sex-slave.

Our relationship has never been like this. I truly care for her.

&T (for the most part) doesn't understand a healthy, loving relationship and has a very cynical view of love.

It isn't supposed to be "Who screwed up" or "Who feels jealous?"

I actually feel sorry for people who have those kinds of relationships.

Don't be a bitch. You'll probably be a bitch anyway, but you may learn from this experience.

Man I know all their dirty little tricks, and only the bitches are consciously aware of their own material.

It's like shooting ducks in a barrel when you turn that shit around on it source. Most women spend their entire lives looking for someone who understands how to play their game better than them. They don't want romeo, they want the illusion of romeo to justify themselves for falling for the bullshit. Keep em jealous and they won't leave.

If other girls are interested, you must be a better catch than them and they'll cling to you because of it.

It's when they get board because you're eating out of their hand that they find someone else. The dependant person in a relationship is just that: A burden. Girls aren't looking for a guy who needs them. They want a guy to tell them they are everything and that means a lot because it's coming from someone out of their league, which they know because their actions tell a whole nother story. They want to be the one being strung along, and will leave you if you aren't the one doing it.

Everyone wants a better deal. The trick is convincing your's that you're the catch that they won't do better than.

Don't blame the chick if you bore them in to cheating. You got in to this game knowing full well they were emotional idiots completely out of control of their own behavior. If you're not pulling their stings, someone else will.

Any chicks who want to pitch in on how none of this is true sound completely unattractive don't they?

Do you want the insecure fat chick who's looking for someone to eat out of her hand?

Hell no, you want the fucking hot bitch who blew you off to fuck you and leave you, whether you admit it or not. You'll want her more for not wanting your attention.

That's probably the only reason the topic starter is even broken up about this bitch.

She probably didn't even want someone else and was worried he was losing interest after he sounded distant on the phone or missed a call. It was probably a test to see how he would react and to real him back in.

Okay, not really. That would make sense except the topic starter is acting boring and clingy, not like a catch who just got realed back in. But my point remains.