Right now, I am 15, a freshman in high school and I can't seem to get my relationships straight. I haven't had a girlfriend since I was in 7th grade, and now that girl hates me. I am a verrrry passive person, get along with almost anyone, and am overall pretty laid back. I hang out with the preppy people sort of, but also some of the guys who you know are going to be selling pot and blow later on in their life.

I just moved to a new school that is about 20 minutes away from my old one, and have lost contact with all of the people who I used to hang out with. They don't understand that I can not be up there with them three or four times a week when you live with your grandmother, who works two jobs, and aunt, who is a fucking smootcher and has never moved out of my grandmas, even though she is over 30 years old, and is making almost as much as her.

I really like a girl, and I have pretty much since I met her in September when I moved here. She was in a lot of my classes before, and now she isn't in any since the semester ended. She is a pretty girl, hasn't been with a guy for a while and seems like someone who wouldn't go through a guy every three days, like most of the girls in my grade...

I try to talk to this girl without sounding creepy, but the only times I see her is between classes. I really don't know how to talk to her and get closer, and I haven't even been over to her house, or anywhere for that matter. I know for a fact that she is a virgin, and so am I, so I know that if I were to get into a relationship with her, there probably wouldn't be much sex, but strangely enough I am ok with this.

She is very anti drug, and this is really the only problem I see between us. We both like the same activities and our opinions on many things are the same. I have been a daily pot smoker for over 4 months, and I am now trying to quit just for this girl. I don't want to sound obsessive, but I am really trying to get my life straightened out, since before I moved at my old school I was very problematic and my grades reflected that, and it seems as if I was a whole different person. I have matured insanely over the last six months, and am very glad for it. I guess according to standards I have had kind of a bad home life, I grew up with my mom, grandma and aunt, then moved to the school I was at last year when I was in fifth grade. There was a step father in the house, and he was abusive according to most people, but him and my mother separated supposedly, but I dont know, I only see my mom about once a week and for all I know he could be there. Like I said before, I live with my grandma and my aunt now, so I am never there to see my friends or sister very often.

Lately I have been feeling that I am worthless, I am failing most of my classes, am flat broke because of pot, can't play any sports because of my grades, and am overall pretty fucking messed up. The only real interest I have is hunting and shooting, and since I live in the city, I can't do either very often. Being without a car doesn't help the matter, and I still have six months till I can get my license. I really feel I am on the verge of suicide, it feels as if I could end it now, and am very curios as to what would happen if i did, to see if it would be like they say in church and whatever, but I have never actually pulled the trigger. I really need some suggestions on what I could do about girls and friends, because I think that is what is getting me depressed, not having a social life. I really could use some suggestions, and at this point I really could care less if you flame or whatever, tell me to pull the trigger, do whatever. I don't care about anything anymore.

I wish I could give you an in depth, and articulate answer, but I don't know exactly what to say. But I'll try to get my point across, anyway.

You have to realize that life isn't what it's cracked up to be.You have to realize that the world is a very big place. You have to find what makes you happy, and do it. You have to have dreams, you don't have much if you don't have dreams.

And as for the girl, it's a hard situation. I guess your best bet would be to talk to her, you know her right? Just try to catch her between classes or after school or something, tell her you want to hang out, if you feel comfortable, or ask for her phone number. It's completely alright to be connected on an emotional level, rather than a sexual one. This just makes you seem less creepy, because you won't be thinking about just fucking her all the time.

I know what it's like to want to be with some one so much, but feeling hopeless.

I met a girl, when I was in the Ninth grade. I liked her a lot, and we connected more emotionally than physically. But I was slightly nervous around her, so when she asked me to go to the mall or something, I'd make up some lame excuse, even though I would have loved to spend the time together. As a result, she moved away, and we never did anything. I liked her, and she liked me. I still miss her.

It sounds like you need to turn your life around.

Stop smoking pot, save some money, play sports again, see how much you can fucking ace your schoolwork!

Shit man, why not. You've only got one life to live.

Imagine how you'd feel if you completely hauled your life around and girls like the one you like were lining up for you.

Wouldn't it be insane if you made yourself irresistable to the girl you desire.

Just do it, consider this your epiphane. Only one life to live, quit masturbating and hiding. Make this life your bitch.

Don't change your ways for anyone.

that was a very long post, and I didn't read all of it but I got the general message.

Step1: find out what clubs/sports she's into.

step2: join said clubs/sports

step3:talk to her, get e-mail/msn/yahoo/whatever you use to talk to people at your school with.

step4: get to know her

step5: ask her out.

Thanks for the serious replies... I am on her myspace friends so I guess thats a start.