Ok, so obviously I haven't dated in a long time. Last time I did, I was a junior in high school and you didn't REALLY go out on dates as such.. rather go to the movies or hang out at your parents house a couple times. Then you'd just say 'will you go out with me?'

Times seem different now, though. I don't want to jump to conclusions, but I also don't want to have to ask point blank because it makes my cluelessness even more obvious.

Here's the deal.

I've been seeing this girl. We went out a couple times to the bar, had a good time, made fun of the open mic people. Good stuff. I NEVER make a first move, generally, because I hate to feel too forward or intrusive. That said, I just went out with this girl as a friend, and not as a potential girlfriend.

This past weekend, though, I went out with her again and her friend was there. I get along really well with him, too, so on Saturday night I asked him (in a drunken mess) if he liked her at all. He said no, so I told him I was thinking about going for her. He said something to the effect of "she already wants you, you're golden."

That was my cue! Time to make the first move. And I did. Then last night she spent the night (no sex, perverts!) and yeah.. it was pretty cuddly and all-around cute behaviour between us.

So, my question is.. am I already considered a boyfriend at this point? Do you just keep going out until at some point one of you actually says it? Or do you have to actually ASK them?

I certainly won't ask it point blank, because I find it incredibly hokey, but I am curious to know exactly how you can tell otherwise.

Plan a another night like that and seal it with a sweet little kiss.

It sounds to me like you shouldn't have to ask, but I wouldn't say you two are already an item. Talk to her about it, if you really need to have a label on your relationship.

You are not her boyfriend.

Just keep 'seeing her' (as the middle ground is put) till she refers to you as her bf on her own accord. That's when you're set.

Being born in the wrong century ,as I was, I find that the title 'Master''Sir' or 'Lord' for me and 'slave' or 'wench' for her works well...

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Being born in the wrong century ,as I was, I find that the title 'Master''Sir' or 'Lord' for me and 'slave' or 'wench' for her works well...



Don't forget "Bitch!"

Example: When your playing WoW and shes nagging you to get off:

"Bitch! Shut the fuck up and suck my dick, and if your good enough, I just MIGHT pay attention to you!"

Wtf...

You're college aged? And you had a girl sleepover? And you didnt have sex, or kiss, or anything?

Thats just pathetic...Girls like guys that arent all about sex. But there needs to be something physical there as well.

Whoa, I just said we didn't have sex. Didn't say anything else about it.

Also, we are post-college age. So, yeah. It really wasn't pathetic, because there was a deal of making out. Honestly, I just had a good time laying there talking/attempting to sleep.

Anyway, I'm not looking for the title as such, just wondered how you even know. I had planned on just letting it go and waiting for her to refer to me as such, so that is what I will do.

That's not neccessarily pathetic. Actually it must've amplified the sexual tension tremendously.

Take her out to dinner & back to your housssse, you don't have tohave sex or w/e though

Fuck what they say, the sleepover is cute. As a female roughly around the age that you're talking about [assuming you're in college]...

If neither one of you says something and you don't talk about it, you are not going out. You just aren't. You don't have to ask her out, but you can do something like in a few weeks [after a few more dates, etc. that all go well], when you're hanging out, say something to her like, "So where are we in our relationship?" That should open up the conversation enough so that you can talk about it. She can go from there.

quote:Originally posted by SilentMind:

Wtf...

You're college aged? And you had a girl sleepover? And you didnt have sex, or kiss, or anything?

Thats just pathetic...Girls like guys that arent all about sex. But there needs to be something physical there as well.

I'm 19, and in all my relationships I've jumped straight into sex...but I think what he did was awesome

She came over again tonight to watch a movie with me (and we actually did WATCH it). Afterwards, more making out and general cuddliness. I have to say, it was fuckin awesome. I really like this girl and I don't want to fuck it up by having sex "just because." I'd rather it be a little more than just being horny.

Anyway, yeah I think it is cute. It's fun. Caressing and kissing is the way to go for initial contact.

And since it's been mentioned a couple times, her and I are both 24.