Ok, the title is a bit of a joke, but it holds some bearing. I can pick up women pretty well (better than most people). I am good looking, I dress well, and I'm intelligent. Please don't take this as pretension, while I am vain, this is merely background, to give you an idea what's going on.

So, basically, while I can pick up women, any woman who has known me for more than a few hours gets to hating me. I do put my foot in my mouth CONSTANTLY and I can be a dick at times, but anybody who is my real friend knows that I'm dependable, very fun (especially drunk), and I have a lot of love to give and whatnot.

Seriously, I'd be the world's greatest boyfriend if I had a chance to mold a woman how I wanted.

Anywho, what is the problem? I know it lies somewhere between my actions and what I say. I've never had much success talking to everyday people (being narcissistic isn't as fun as you'd think) but I feel as if I can charm women, and I do, since I manage to pick em up. Now how do I make that last? What should I say (and more importantly NOT SAY) and how should I act? I know all women are different, but I'm just asking in general.

You might not think I have issues, but you don't understand just how much of a problem this is. I've easily ruined 10+ relationships, and put off 50+ women. SO WHAT GIVES?

You remind me a lot of myself in some ways...

What are some of the things you say that drives them away?

quote:Originally posted by Rykoshet:

Seriously, I'd be the world's greatest boyfriend if I had a chance to mold a woman how I wanted.

Edit: Didn't see you had also quoted this, Euda... good to see it raises red flags for someone else too.

[This message has been edited by Twisted_Ferret (edited 01-30-2007).]

Yeah if we all could mold our significant others into sandwich making dome-machines no one would have a problem finding a partner. No wonder women don't like you.

quote:Originally posted by Twisted_Ferret:

Edit: Didn't see you had also quoted this, Euda... good to see it raises red flags for someone else too.

I noticed that too, but I thought it was an intentional joke...

Doesn't really sound like it to me, considering the context & rest of the post... but Totse does have a pretty fucked up sense of humor, heh.

quote:Originally posted by kappelpie:

Yeah if we all could mold our significant others into sandwich making dome-machines no one would have a problem finding a partner. No wonder women don't like you.

That's what I'm trying to fix. I can't help how I think, but I can censor what I do and say.

The reason I said it is because I'd want something simple. Not easy or boring, but I hate the games women play, especially in the beginning. I can never interpret signs properly, so I hate that stage.

quote:Originally posted by Twisted_Ferret:

Doesn't really sound like it to me, considering the context & rest of the post... but Totse does have a pretty fucked up sense of humor, heh.

Well, if he's serious when he says that, then it is pretty obvious what the problem here is...

Honestly, I say things like that but I mean them in a more joking way.

This whole thread just really reminds me of my "Am I the perfect catch or just really narcissistic?" thread. Although, in my case at least, I don't go around actually expecting such ridiculous desires to materialize...

quote:Originally posted by Rykoshet:

Why don't any women like me?

Because your a conceited prick, and women don't like conceited pricks.

We should date.

I need to date someone who's more on an asshole than me, so I don't look like too much of a bitch.

It's not happening at the moment for some reason...

Yeah....that is problem #1, the whole molding thing. #2 I'd say is what you say and your personality.

From what you type, even though it seems all well mannered I bet you are a total fucking douche later in the convo, so change that you're good.

quote:Originally posted by bloodenangel:

We should date.

I need to date someone who's more on an asshole than me, so I don't look like too much of a bitch.

It's not happening at the moment for some reason...

if this occurs, please never have children.

quote:Originally posted by bloodenangel:

We should date.

I need to date someone who's more on an asshole than me, so I don't look like too much of a bitch.

It's not happening at the moment for some reason...

Australia? Fuck that.

Seriously though, I KNOW I need to change what I say and do, but HOW and to WHAT?

This simple step by step guide will solve all of your problems.

1. Go to safeway.

2. Buy Drain-o and some Raid

3. Mix 1cup draino with 1/4th tsp of water

4. Huff the raid

5. Drink the Drain-o mixture.

6. Enjoy.

All of your problems are gone. And ours. I mean think about it, you're asking on how to change how you THINK on an internet forum. If you have to do that, then you aren't THINKING and a waste of oxygen. Yes I'm an asshole, but the truth hurts.

Heh I bet it make you feel like you're the bottem feeder?

No helpful replies, how very Totse.

quote:Originally posted by Rykoshet:

No helpful replies, how very Totse.

Probably because no one here knows exactly what you need to change in order to improve yourself...

you lie. Mine was the most helpful with the information provided.

Go to a therapist and get your mental issues fixed before your relationship issues.

quote:Originally posted by Refacull18:

you lie. Mine was the most helpful with the information provided.

That's true, it was helpful. Not for him, of course, but for us it was.

Sometimes I'll get put off by good looking, generally decent girls because I just don't like the vibe they give off. Like, there's something I don't know... maybe I'm crazy? Or maybe girls think the same way sometimes.

From what you say, you're a great package. Except you seem to be making a fatal mistake.

You're presenting the package to the woman instead of letting them lust over it from afar.

Be there, be the best, be totally inacessable.

You seem to accept yourself fairly well; but the statement about molding a person being easier makes it sounds as if you want a dick-whipped piece of meat, not a partner.

Maybe do a bit of soul-searching to find out if you are misogynous? Women and men are basically the same - society just tends to mold our hobbies and personalities a shit-load more than hormones and genetics do.

You are what? A core value? Beliefs that stem from it? Rationale for said beliefs? Emotions arising from cognitive dissonance in relation to failed rationale on said beliefs? Emotions arising from the harmony of successful rationale? Actions based on the expression and suppression of your emotions? And most often, a want to be accepted wholly as you are?

If you happened to answer these honestly; my presumption is that if you are not a clinical psychopath, all your answers were yes. That would be because you are a human: not a male, not a female...but a human. The REAL difference between men and women is truly nothing more than physical...which is nice, because the bodies interlock quite perfectly.

I'm not saying you are misogynous, but you might. Modern society does do a good job of turning masculinity and femininity into an issue of dominance and supremacy. I try to think of it as an issue of harmony, attempting to understand the differences and similarities and accepting both...a relationship, if you will.

In regards to changing the WAY you think. FUCK THAT. You are an individual; the specific processes you use to think should NEVER be changed for anyone. Sometimes though, it helps to apply your processes to your 'secure' beliefs to question them...to ensure they truly are secure, and to abandon them if they are faulty.

You think the way you do because it helped your father inseminate an egg...which, unless by rape, required him to woo a woman well enough to let him fuck her - it's in your blood. Fucking up your brain's chemistry by forcing a change in entire thinking patterns is self-destructive and one of the most common sources of depression that I see in people.

Examine the parts of yourself that aren't entirely nature made - your beliefs, your attitude, your feelings. Not your body, not your mind, not your heart. Nature usually does a damned good job with all 3 (excepting cripples, retards, and psychopaths...and even then, the other 2 usually make up for the lacking attribute).

Thank you Catharthic and Hexadecimal. I'm going to do some soul searching, and for now, as a quick-fix, not put my foot in my mouth as much. Here's to hoping.

A wise man is one who thinks before he speaks. An even wiser man is one who thinks before he doesn't speak.

[This message has been edited by AntiMagnetic (edited 01-30-2007).]