Generally when I'm not with someone I search around for someone to aim my sights on. In times that are less than plentiful I end up convincing myself i'm iterested in some pretty unsuitable women...

But the thing is, I don't really feel right or normal unless I like or love someone. Even if I'm not with the person, it just makes me feel normal...and I'm usually quite miserable and disatisfied if there's noone decent around to focus my romantic attention on.

The thing is, I know there's no point me having a girlfriend right about now. And for quite a while. But already I have these longings and ideas and I know (through experience) they'll soon become obsessive and dominate my thoughts and I wish I could shut them off...or at least just turn them down.

Is this normal for a 19 year old guy or what?

I feel like that quite a lot. Especially when I'm feeling depressed though. When I'm happy, I tend to feel quite satisfied with my independence. So maybe that's something totally different...

Although even when I'm happy, I sometimes just want someone there to share it with.

I dunno, I don't even know what I want anymore.

Yeah it's normal dude.

Perfectly normal.

Just make sure you know when to stop 'focusing that attention'...ie when you're not gazing into their eyes but their bathroom window...

:P

Seriously dude, lot of women would kill for a bloke who felt that way.

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:

Generally when I'm not with someone I search around for someone to aim my sights on. In times that are less than plentiful I end up convincing myself i'm iterested in some pretty unsuitable women...

But the thing is, I don't really feel right or normal unless I like or love someone. Even if I'm not with the person, it just makes me feel normal...and I'm usually quite miserable and disatisfied if there's noone decent around to focus my romantic attention on.

The thing is, I know there's no point me having a girlfriend right about now. And for quite a while. But already I have these longings and ideas and I know (through experience) they'll soon become obsessive and dominate my thoughts and I wish I could shut them off...or at least just turn them down.

Is this normal for a 19 year old guy or what?

You sound cool.



Do you play CS:S ?

It is the only way a self-respecting yoyobek can chose a mate

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Perfectly normal.

Just make sure you know when to stop 'focusing that attention'...ie when you're not gazing into their eyes but their bathroom window...

:P

Seriously dude, lot of women would kill for a bloke who felt that way.

So long as she doesn't find out, there's nothing wrong with it.

It's not healthy, if that's what you care to know. Having to love someone else for you to feel "right" is a rather unhealthy personality disorder that FAR TOO many people suffer from. Love yourself first and foremost. No one else will EVER be able to love you as much as you SHOULD love yourself.

After you love yourself, you'll find that girls will flock to you. Just remember your standards and don't pick any one girl because she's there.

I think I have the same problem as you. I always feel lonely and depressed half the time even when I'm kicking it with my friends. I always feel like theres something missing. It drives me crazy sometimes, to the point where I can't even sleep at night, and wake up feeling like shit all over again. When I do hook up with girls at parties or whatever, it never lasts for more than a week. I've never been in a fully committed relationship in my life. I don't know, I'm 18 right now, so I guess I'm still pretty young. I care more about finding true love than I do about anything else. I feel like my life will never be complete, and I'll never find true happiness unless I find that special person. I guess I am one of those crazy, clingy, desperate guys, who seek too much attention. I have to change but I just don't know how to be at peace with myself.

quote:Originally posted by yoyobek:

You sound cool.



Do you play CS:S ?

It is the only way a self-respecting yoyobek can chose a mate

GIVE ME YOUR XFIRE. NOW.

I play CS:S obsessively. But I really fucking suck, so don't expect to be impressed by l33t sk1llz.

love is such a beautiful thing, that requires such ugly things.

its overrated. but underrated too. If its for you, which is probably is based on your post. Dont worry about it. Live.

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:

Generally when I'm not with someone I search around for someone to aim my sights on. In times that are less than plentiful I end up convincing myself i'm iterested in some pretty unsuitable women...

But the thing is, I don't really feel right or normal unless I like or love someone. Even if I'm not with the person, it just makes me feel normal...and I'm usually quite miserable and disatisfied if there's noone decent around to focus my romantic attention on.

The thing is, I know there's no point me having a girlfriend right about now. And for quite a while. But already I have these longings and ideas and I know (through experience) they'll soon become obsessive and dominate my thoughts and I wish I could shut them off...or at least just turn them down.

Is this normal for a 19 year old guy or what?

Hmm... is it that you need a focus for attention, or do you hope for attention in return? Do you need to love, or is it that you need to feel loved?

I'd say it's probably the former, because I feel happiness when selflessly devoting myself to my love. But I think the latter is more common.

Don't you have a girlfriend, rabbit?

"Everybody needs somebody to love"

Yeah, I listen to Queen!!

This is shit, however. From my experience, a nineteen year old male does need something to lust after. If there is nothing available, then the sights are set on something unobtainable.

Solution? Lower your standards temporarily. Something else will come along, until then go find something to bang.

If it's the most important thing in your life, you're going to have a hard time finding anything worth your time. Girls can sense desperation.

Hmmm..... why do girls hate the desperate thing so much? I guess its a pretty dumb question.



[This message has been edited by NaRcO (edited 01-18-2007).]

It's normal. Don't let it get out of hand though, else you'll end up even lonelier and broke.

quote:Originally posted by Twisted_Ferret:



I play CS:S obsessively. But I really fucking suck, so don't expect to be impressed by l33t sk1llz.

My steam name is yoyotech.

I'm in the UK and work weird gay hours so may not be on much at times.



/hijack.

yeah if you need someone you can just love thats good,btw have you ever gotten tail? but i guess since you are 19 it might be too early to just find a solid relationship and stick with it. my cousin is like that and it seems like it sucks they have been dating for like three years and hes 22 and has not yet had sex.

[This message has been edited by throopguy21 (edited 01-19-2007).]

well dude i think tht is normal in my opinion, i been trhu this and im only 16, if i dnt like a girl i dnt feel right but when im having fun with friends and such i barely think about it, just hang in there

Excuse the bump, computer crapped out for a bit.

quote:Originally posted by yoyobek:

You sound cool.



Do you play CS:S ?

It is the only way a self-respecting yoyobek can chose a mate

Right now i'm playing turn of the century games like rollcage and worms armageddon. Stupid lake of innovativeness in modern times. I like anything tekken though.

Alas, I don't like first person shooters.

quote:Originally posted by Gus:

It's not healthy, if that's what you care to know. Having to love someone else for you to feel "right" is a rather unhealthy personality disorder that FAR TOO many people suffer from. Love yourself first and foremost. No one else will EVER be able to love you as much as you SHOULD love yourself.

After you love yourself, you'll find that girls will flock to you. Just remember your standards and don't pick any one girl because she's there.

I do love myself. I just get bored when I'm not interested in anyone. Sort of. And it's not like I'm actually desperate I just....convince myself I'm desperate. It's really hard to explain.

Answer my question, damn you!

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:

I do love myself. I just get bored when I'm not interested in anyone. Sort of. And it's not like I'm actually desperate I just....convince myself I'm desperate. It's really hard to explain.

Then make it less complicated by getting rid of that issue. Love thyself and others will love you.

~~~

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

Answer my question, damn you!

Whining and demanding will only get you the back-end of a man's fist, girl.



[This message has been edited by Gus (edited 01-24-2007).]

quote:Originally posted by Gus:

Whining and demanding will only get you the back-end of a man's fist, girl.





Actually, men usually give in to my whining. If only to shut me up...lol. Usually puppy dog eyes are the answer though.

*puppy dog eyes at rabbitweed*

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

Answer my question, damn you!

I would love to go with you to the Pr...wait, that wasn't your question.

Oh right, I no longer have a girlfriend.

Aw, what happened? I thought you were really into her...Was it the distance?

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

Actually, men usually give in to my whining. If only to shut me up...lol. Usually puppy dog eyes are the answer though.

*puppy dog eyes at rabbitweed*

Glad I have really loud music...

*Blasts Dragonforce to make Sick_Boy's whining go away*

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

Aw, what happened? I thought you were really into her...Was it the distance?

pretty much, yeah. We still really like each other so I oftend find it a bit confusing. breakups are weird when the other person is nice and still interested in you :/

I'd say it's normal, but I'm a girl....I wont lie, half my school day I'm daydreaming about sexual things, and then I sort of feel like a pervert! haha, whatever, hopefully no one in my classes can read minds!

quote:Originally posted by LOla_LOndon:

[...]hopefully no one in my classes can read minds!

What, you didn't know that all men could read women's minds? Why do you think we know how to get to you so easily? You're giving most of the guys in your class a peepshow of the mind.

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:

pretty much, yeah. We still really like each other so I oftend find it a bit confusing. breakups are weird when the other person is nice and still interested in you :/

That sucks. But I'm confident in your ability to find a girlfriend.

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

That sucks. But I'm confident in your ability to find a girlfriend.

No! I don't want to find a girlfriend! I want to be girlfriendless. So far, I'm doing a good job. I think still liking me ex and stuff is stopping me from getting all distracted.

Okay then, I'm confident in your ability to find a girlfriend when you want to. Happy now? lol

I think clingy guys can be pretty cool.

I dont understand why a girl could get pissed off when I guy dared to want to spend alot of time with her.

"dude, go away!! your so annoying, all you ever want to do is hug me and be nice to me and spend time with me! how dare you?!"

Ick. I can imagine it now. What a bitch.

I'm just like that too.

And now i really think me and my current sweetheart are really meant to be together (i have my reasons)...I guess that's a side effect of watching too many chick flicks over the years. *Blushes*

Well if it's not were both weird.

quote:Originally posted by yoyobek:

I think clingy guys can be pretty cool.

I dont understand why a girl could get pissed off when I guy dared to want to spend alot of time with her.

"dude, go away!! your so annoying, all you ever want to do is hug me and be nice to me and spend time with me! how dare you?!"

Ick. I can imagine it now. What a bitch.

haha...i don't know if that's the definition of clinging though. I thought it was more getting shitty when a girl hangs out with her friends, then when she does...texting/calling a chick constantly, wanting to spend every day with her, you know, that kind of stuff.

If wanting to hug and see a girl a couple of times a week is clingy then call me a motherfucking limpet.

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:



If wanting to hug and see a girl a couple of times a week is clingy then call me a motherfucking limpet.

I'm ten times the limpet you'll ever be!!



I text my boyfriend about 5 times a day. I'm allways pretty paranoid "do you mind me texting you so much? Do you want me to stop..? You'd tell me if it got annoying,right..?" And he allways assures me it's okay.

I'm not 'checking up' on him or anything, I just miss him, want to hear from him, want to make sure he's okay.

But..



It's probably not okay,really. I shouldnt feel the need to text him so often, and I really shouldnt start inwardly getting scared that he's off fucking 100 pretty beautifull skinny girls if he doesent respond within an hour.

But I keep quiet, keep my mouth shut.



I'm a true limpet, but I try to hide it as much as possible.

yoyobek, shoot me off an email at oceantrash1987@hotmail.com, I want to ask you something.