I'm at college, and I hooked up with a girl towards the end of 2006. We went out for a fortnight before term ended, and then split up in the new year for various reasons (my fault and hers). Now she wants to get back together with me, and I'm in a bind:

I had become used to being single again and was very content to have broken up with her. When I saw her again, however, I realised that I am still very physically attracted to her, but I fear that after we start going out again I will resent her (for a number of reasons I can't go into here). On the other hand, this may not be the case; it may be fine, I can't second guess myself on this. Plus there's the thing that we haven't had sex yet (I know, it's college, but she's a virgin) and I really, really would like to fuck her, but obviously that will take time, commitment and coaxing that I'm not sure I'm willing to dedicate myself to.

Sorry if I'm being opaque, I'm confused on the issue.

If its a girl that you actually like, you really should spend the time going after her, instead of wondering what could have been. Trust me, a few weeks or months is worth the wait sometimes.

I realise sound a bit of a bastard about wanting to fuck her but that's how it is. What with all the commitment I would be putting in I don't think I would be short-changing her: we would both have to want it.

In this case it's better to give it a shot and see what happens. You might kick yourself for it later, but it's worth learning from it. Do it and see how it goes!

quote:Originally posted by ottomann:

If its a girl that you actually like, you really should spend the time going after her, instead of wondering what could have been. Trust me, a few weeks or months is worth the wait sometimes.

Thanks for your advice. Thing is, I don't want to get into something then spend ages escaping gracefully so I don't look like a manipulative bastard. There are other girls out there who may like more.

quote:Originally posted by madeyes:

Thanks for your advice. Thing is, I don't want to get into something then spend ages escaping gracefully so I don't look like a manipulative bastard. There are other girls out there who may like more.

But thats just one of the risks you take, which would you rather have? a few days knowing you hurt someone you might have liked, or a (perhaps?) lifelong relationship with a beautiful girl?

...

i thought so *squints*