So, how many of you have felt this?

You're in a new relationship after meeting someone in, say, a class. After being acquaintances for a while (months), you end up going on a date and kissing. A week later, you go on another date and have a wonderful time, and again kiss. This time, however, you get into it and really end up 'messing around.' You both opt not to have sex, but rather to spend the night with each other. You spend the entire night in her bed kissing, touching, and being close.

She leads a busy life (work, friends), while you feel like you'd drop anything to see her again. There's no doubt about whether or not she's really into you -- but you still feel lonely knowing you can't see her. You don't want to give the impression of being clingy or restrictive, however. You just can't seem to get enough of her, and feel lonely knowing that she has her own priorities (that are perfectly valid).

You end up sitting around hoping she'll call or message you, because you can't stand the thought of waiting entire days without seeing her again.

Edit: I'm out of work and school at the moment. I'm not a total loser.

[This message has been edited by PoseidonHurri (edited 01-14-2007).]

VIRGIN!

uhhh do you have your own friends? Then hang out with them. Dont get attatched too quickly

Actually bro, I'm in a very similar predicament.

I am working though, and we actually work together. There are a few slight differences, but 70% of what you said relates to me.

The advice I gave myself today:

Stop getting emotionally attached so soon.

And that was it. I dropped the emotionally attachment, and I feel much more empowered and independent.

You are just bored and lonely, and the fact that she is, and that you like her are just kinda exacerbating that.

Know what I mean? Just don't think about it. Do whatever you do. Play videogames, make food, watch TV, etc.

DO NOT get emotionally attached after just 2 dates man. Trust me. Even if you have known her for months.

It doesn't really matter anyways because you will break up eventually. Nothing lasts forever. Especially when you are 13-30.

Yeah, and I'm only two or so months out of a 3 year relationship. But there's just something about this that is hard to shake. Like there's more I should be doing or something -- perhaps some stupid insecurity I have left over.

Thanks...And I forgot just how quickly folks on Totse reply.

quote:Originally posted by majinbijiita:

It doesn't really matter anyways because you will break up eventually. Nothing lasts forever. Especially when you are 13-30.

Defeatist attitude.

quote:Originally posted by PoseidonHurri:

Yeah, and I'm only two or so months out of a 3 year relationship. But there's just something about this that is hard to shake. Like there's more I should be doing or something -- perhaps some stupid insecurity I have left over.

Thanks...And I forgot just how quickly folks on Totse reply.

Thats because brits, Americans and aussies are always on, and all 3 of us are on different timezones and what not. Besides, its totse man! Best place for near instant good advice!

Perhaps, you need to get a job, or go back to school or do something productive with your life. You need to keep busy, regardless if your in a relationship or recovering from one.

meh she sounds like a fucking peasant....In reality just give it time. Shes just a girl don't get attached so quick.

Mate, engage yourself in other activities. Look at this as an opportunity to better your own life, by imitating (not totally) hers.

Thanks guys.

I normally go to school full time, and work full time. I've been on winter break, and out of work for health reasons for a month (and one more to go), however.

I think I already feel better. I think it's the mixture of knowing I still need to move out of my current place (with the ex), having no real income, all friends are away, and I can't stop thinking about my time with this girl. Emotionally attached? Yeah.

Totse is always good for instantly pointing out the truth (or insecurity) behind a post. Good times...

quote:Originally posted by Docta?:

Defeatist attitude.

accurate attitude unluckily and dont i wish it wasnt

quote:Originally posted by Mantikore:

uhhh do you have your own friends? Then hang out with them. Dont get attatched too quickly

Yeah.. I think this comes down to how you spend your time when she's not around. If you occupy yourself with friends and fun, which you should be seeing as your bumming right now, then you wouldn't get so down/obsessed so quickly. Also, this is a common thing in young girls who meet new boys, is the dating thing new for you? The beginning of a relationship often has the strongest feelings of the entire duration. Relax, occupy yourself. That's not to say stop liking her so much - but you need to chill out and live your own life, rather than basing it all around her?