While I was on the phone this afternoon ,verbally beating up on some poor innocent self styled 'Customer Health Care Technician (who until two weeks ago was obviously on the meat counter at Tescos),My 16 year old crippled son brought home his 18 year girlfriend for the first time.

As I was talking in the other room , she and he just disappeared up to his bedroom to play on the new xboxpsthingy...I assume. Although why he needed her to take his shirt off for that is a bit of a mystery but I'm not up on all this modern technology.

Anyways, a couple of hours later I was in the kitchen prep'ing the food for the meal when she comes into the kitchen to ask me something.

I turned to say hello to her and i am ashamed to admit that my first thought was 'she's pretty, how on earth did my idiot crippled kid manage to pull a bint of that class?'

Then I realised i had been already given her the ice blue eye sparkle and was sending out massive amounts of my own brand of 'irresistable to women animal magnetism' and theta waves of dominance!

Quickly turned off the charm of course.

And then anyway she open her gob and spoke.

Thank fuck she's a 'geordie' (birmingham)!!

All remnants and vestiges of desire in my body died on impact with the first of her mangled vowels and her funny foreign pronunciations!

Why can't my kids date Brit girls??! (youngest son's 19 year old g/f is from Coventry and Eldest's ex was from yorkshire I think...all fucking geordies.)

Anyways the point of the thread is to ask how do your parents act around your girlfriends/boyfriends?.

Have you ever noticed that your Dad fancies her?

Girls, does your Mom go all 'girly' and 'giggly' when he comes round to pick you up?

[This message has been edited by jackketch (edited 12-27-2006).]

Some accents are just irritating. I live in Hull, and I should know.

Luckily, thanks to moving around so much as a child, I have almost an RP radio voice. Not posh, but anyone with a regional accent will call it posh.

My father always told us the importance of talking clearly without any regional slurs.

"How will you get a job if you talk like THAT???!?!"

I do wonder if I sound too "posh" though.

And I hear some Americans don't know what posh means. It's like er.. snobbish? Upper class?

[This message has been edited by Flock (edited 12-27-2006).]

What happened to your son?

If she is dating a 'cripple' as you kindly put, then you know she isnt after him for skin but because of affection.

I suppose thats +1 for the geordie!

quote:Originally posted by Jack_and_Jill:

What happened to your son?

If she is dating a 'cripple' as you kindly put, then you know she isnt after him for skin but because of affection.

I suppose thats +1 for the geordie!

Oxygen deficiency at birth. He's in a wheel chair-diaplegic spastic.

And according to his brother, with whom crippled son shares a room, she is very definitely 'after his skin'...

But then why... if as you say she was hot... and a geordie then im sure (not being offencive) she could date someone will more of a skin...



If you know what i mean :S

And you can never know for sure, she might be making the older bro jealous?

When with a girl and friends you always want the girl to do something hot... tada!

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:



Girls, does your Mom go all 'girly' and 'giggly' when he comes round to pick you up?

My mom used to touch my boyfriends cheeks and comment on how he was too "pretty" to be a boy. (gosh, was he cute. Even today I rather "soften" looking at his pic.)

Usually, though, the men I brought home were not so "pretty" as he. (She grew to dislike him very much.)

My Gran used to hit on my boyfriends.

Few of them ever came back.

The ones that did I dumped for their weirdness.

I now live a lonely existance.

Masturbation is my only comfort.

My mother treats my girlfriends like any of my mates, and she always has. Even ones she absolutely despises, she gives a wide berth at first and doesn't embarress any more than a mother has to.

And here I was, whilst clicking on this thread, thinking you were finally going to admit that you were ashamed not because of your son's new girl, but because..

..you were waxing your carrot over those nekkid pictures on that girls hard drive!

I thought better of you, Jack.

I remember a young man's father that I was attracted to.

My young man took me to his father's house, with whom he was living. I asked him if it was okay with his dad and he said it was.

Lo and behold...his father came home early. My young man jumped out of bed and just as he was slipping his pants on his father opened the door. I was under the covers...naked.

His father told us to get dressed and leave. My young man left the room while I was still getting dressed. Then his father knocked on the door and I opened it (dressed). Then his father apologized to me and explained that he had an agreement with his son that he was not to bring girls home without him and his wife being there.

I remember him saying that he was sure I was a nice girl, but an agreement was broken.

He was so sexy. Tall, silver haired, well-built man. I remember thinking to myself that...if he wasn't married...how I'd totally go for him.

He kicked his son out, and I dumped his son for lying to me.

Man...his father was sexy.

(A bit off-topic, I know...)

Haha I fucking love reading posts from jackketch.

No seperation between brummies and geordies? Brummies are far worse.

Parents have always been accomadating, except for once or twice when I deserved otherwise.

Smile, nod, avoid, toss in a headshake or two; unless they earn a different treatment.

quote:Originally posted by Flock:

Some accents are just irritating. I live in Hull, and I should know.

Luckily, thanks to moving around so much as a child, I have almost an RP radio voice. Not posh, but anyone with a regional accent will call it posh.

My father always told us the importance of talking clearly without any regional slurs.

"How will you get a job if you talk like THAT???!?!"

I do wonder if I sound too "posh" though.

And I hear some Americans don't know what posh means. It's like er.. snobbish? Upper class?



Yes, surprisingly Americans know what posh means. I would say that my mother gets giddy, however I have never brought any girls around my father. So, I can't really say how he would act.

I am sure he would just give me a "good work" speech.

the other day my grandmother asked Euda if he had ever considered modeling and gave him the ole eye. my mother jumped in and contended "no, he's average looks!" apparently trying to save him embarassment (according to her). then my grandmother attempted to dance with him. i was very, very embarassed. Euda denies she was hitting on him.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

the other day my grandmother asked Euda if he had ever considered modeling and gave him the ole eye. my mother jumped in and contended "no, he's average looks!" apparently trying to save him embarassment (according to her). then my grandmother attempted to dance with him. i was very, very embarassed. Euda denies she was hitting on him.

Hehehe Old people...

I'd be pretty creeped out if my father didn't want to fuck a hot 20 year old when he sees one. Obviously something wrong that I'd be missing

Jack, your son is a cripple. Beggars can't be choosers, I'm afraid you'll have to live with him scoring mentally handicapped gorgeous women. I'm sorry, this must be really hard on you

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

And then anyway she open her gob and spoke.

Thank fuck she's a 'geordie' (birmingham)!!



Geordie is from Newcastle. Remember Byker Grove?!

Speaking of accents, I am really fussy on those...far more than looks. I have the "generic anglo" accent, or the newsreader one, with a slight New Zealand influence (I've lived here all my life and people still ask where I'm from).

Anyway, the point is I am really turned on by upperclass anglo accents, where-ever in the world they are. I went on a date once with this english South African chick. She wasn't good looking and was fucking impossible to talk to, but I think I convinced myself to like her because her accent was so hawt.

Uh, oh right. Parents? Well, my parents haven't met my current GF that. As for my previous GF, she'd usually just say hi and make a beeline straight for my room. Eventually she stopped even saying hi.

quote:Originally posted by naive_wisdom:

Geordie is from Newcastle. Remember Byker Grove?!



Where teh lasses wear miniskirts n boobtoobs in teh middle o winter.

jeez geordie is so hard to type!

Yeah, people from York and Birmingham aren't strictly geordies, not that I'm bothered but confusing a brummie girl with a geordie girl is a crime - geordies are horrible but relative to brummies they're like the royal family.

Well, my current boyfriend has so many issues with his own family is near impossible to get him to do anything within a 30 mile radius of my family. So, they've met him about once (properly). I mean, they've met him in passing at the bar before and he's hung out with my brother and I, but he's only met my mother in a sit down situation once. They talked about art dealing because my mother collects art and he's an artist. Afterwards my mother said she was surprised I actually caught a real man and that he's "much more mellow than your usual taste".

As for my father, the only boyfriend of mine he ever met was when I got married and he was down and out so he had to move in with us after 6 years of being estranged. He was very nice to Jonas all the time, never criticised or anything. But, my fathers standards of living and just standards in general are so low his opinions don't even register on the radar.

Cheers,

Lost

"Reshuffles cards"

I've never, ever bought any of my boyfriends home.

My father is too unbearable to put them through such a thing and it will take quite a guy to be allowed to meet him.

I have no problem with any friend or boyfriend meeting my mother but since they live together n all... it doesn't happen.

Plus I don't live with my parents most of the time now, and in a different city so that makes it easier I guess.

it's kind of funny. my parents met Euda about 1 minute after i did.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

i am ashamed to admit that my first thought was 'she's pretty, how on earth did my idiot crippled kid manage to pull a bint of that class?'

This made me really sad.

[This message has been edited by Twisted_Ferret (edited 12-28-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Why can't my kids date Brit girls??! (youngest son's 19 year old g/f is from Coventry and Eldest's ex was from yorkshire I think...all fucking geordies.)

I only understand about half of the things you say. You're posts need fucking subtitles.

Anyways, I went to Coventry. It was awesome, but really sad too. When we heard over the radio that the roads were closed and no one else was being let into the fetival, my friends and I pulled over right on the highway and walked like twenty miles to the campsite. We had to carry our sleeping bags and tents and beer and shit. That part sucked, but it was worth it to hear Phish one last time .

For some reason this reminds me of American Beauty...

Geordies are from Newcastle.

Brummies are from Birmingham.

quote:Originally posted by Flawless:

Geordies are from Newcastle.

Brummies are from Birmingham.



Anyone from north of Watford Gap Service Station is a god cursed geordie (unless they are from the 'diaspora'=east anglia which is even worse!)

Pft. Southern Pansies.

quote:Originally posted by Wintermute:

Pft. Southern Pansies.



I agree.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

the other day my grandmother asked Euda if he had ever considered modeling and gave him the ole eye. my mother jumped in and contended "no, he's average looks!" apparently trying to save him embarassment (according to her). then my grandmother attempted to dance with him. i was very, very embarassed. Euda denies she was hitting on him.

Oh I thought you were pissing about the you and euda thing?

I've never bought a g/f back home, because my mum is seriously embarrasing.

*23 looks around, with a confused look on his American face*

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

While I was on the phone this afternoon ,verbally beating up on some poor innocent self styled 'Customer Health Care Technician (who until two weeks ago was obviously on the meat counter at Tescos),My 16 year old crippled son brought home his 18 year girlfriend for the first time.

As I was talking in the other room , she and he just disappeared up to his bedroom to play on the new xboxpsthingy...I assume. Although why he needed her to take his shirt off for that is a bit of a mystery but I'm not up on all this modern technology.

Anyways, a couple of hours later I was in the kitchen prep'ing the food for the meal when she comes into the kitchen to ask me something.

I turned to say hello to her and i am ashamed to admit that my first thought was 'she's pretty, how on earth did my idiot crippled kid manage to pull a bint of that class?'

Then I realised i had been already given her the ice blue eye sparkle and was sending out massive amounts of my own brand of 'irresistable to women animal magnetism' and theta waves of dominance!

Quickly turned off the charm of course.

And then anyway she open her gob and spoke.

Thank fuck she's a 'geordie' (birmingham)!!

All remnants and vestiges of desire in my body died on impact with the first of her mangled vowels and her funny foreign pronunciations!

Why can't my kids date Brit girls??! (youngest son's 19 year old g/f is from Coventry and Eldest's ex was from yorkshire I think...all fucking geordies.)

Anyways the point of the thread is to ask how do your parents act around your girlfriends/boyfriends?.

Have you ever noticed that your Dad fancies her?

Girls, does your Mom go all 'girly' and 'giggly' when he comes round to pick you up?



I fart on you

maybe your sons crippled-ness gave him a massive cock.

[This message has been edited by SnoKannon (edited 12-28-2006).]

The first time i met my g'f's father.....he was throwing chef's knives into a tree. Reeeeeeal reassuring.

But since then they've warmed to me. And considering my dad passed away 8 or so years ago now, he's busy pimpin up the Virgin Mary.

At least she ain't a scouser, mate...That would suck balls!

And my dad and missus get on pretty well...None of my dad's usual flirty idiotic bullshit that he pulls on the barmaids.

The only girl my dad ever met he damn near adopted as the daughter he never had...

My ex was very pretty, and she always made an effort to look amazingly great when she saw me.

My dad's a disgusting german pervert, who I've found child porn on his computer. He makes inapropriate comments about the most inapropriate things (like my sisters, mothers, 12 year old girls in the street, etc).

Any way, I told him if he ever says a word about Amanda, or even looks at her funny, I will put him in hospital, report him to the police for child porn, and convince my mother to divorce him (again. They're already divorced, and I was the one who convinced my mum to do it).

Seriously, I can handle strangers and random dudes/girls looking at my girlfriend, hell, I can even stand my mates oggling her. But my dad is where I draw the fucking line.

Ketch, stop being such a fucking pervert, do you want your sons to be disgustingly ashamed of you? Well they should be. Fuck, they probably already are ashamed of you.

The British are ridiculous.

In America, if our son brings home a hot girl, we simply have sex with her and don't question how he ended up with her.

And if she has a bizarre accent that somewhat 'ruins' her appeal, we fuck her with earplugs in, and dump her after a mandatory pregnancy test.

Things are so much easier out here... You guys do EVERYTHING like this, huh. It's so complicated!

A true geordie is from Newcastle.

quote:Originally posted by rocker:

My Gran used to hit on my boyfriends.

Few of them ever came back.

The ones that did I dumped for their weirdness.

I now live a lonely existance.

Masturbation is my only comfort.

when your grandma dies call me

Mine threatened restraining orders and decapitation.

And it's been a happy year and a half for me and him since that initial meeting.

Edit: spelling

[This message has been edited by Too Much Ibuprofen (edited 12-30-2006).]