SO, I thought I was okay with it when my bf said he hated all holidays, except Holloween. I am not Christian but I do go home for the holidays, like to look at lights, and have a big party with my family. We limit total spending to $25 each person, and its mostly just talking and playing games. My boyfriend doesn't want to have anything to do with any of this. He makes a point of playing depressing horrible music whenever someone at work puts on christmas music. He outright snarls at people who wish him happy holidays. I know its probably because his family life sucked, and the overall commercialism of the season is irritating.. but I am having issues with his attitude. If he just ignored it and was willing to spend some extra time with a few more people around, I would be so happy. But instead of just ignoring all of the holiday fuss, he has this huge negative reaction and attacks anything cheery.

Look at it this way: at least he's not Jewish

I am.

I make a point of celebrating the holidays and including people when they get like that. They hate it at the time, but smile when they think back on it.

wow, that sucks...why dont you try talking to him about it?

Give him the gift of a Huge Strap-on & Suprise Buttthexxthors! He'll always remember you, this holiday season & the fine ass-poundin' you gave him!

ps You might want to get him a nice, soft pillow for his butt?

I have mentioned it to him... basically it started with Thanksgiving when I asked if he wanted to come with me back home because he didn't have anywhere else to go. He threw a hissy and made a big point of saying that even if everyone came here to see me, we would be having thanksgiving on the lawn because he wouldn't let them in the house. He hates holidays. It wont change. Its pointless to try. He hates holidays and family and everything else that comes with it.

The end result is that I end up pissed off and upset and hurt because my family is such a huge part of my life, and he absolutely refuses to have anything to do with it.

I suppose I am looking for different ways to bring it up and get different results or at least fix my own way of thinking to where it doesn't bother me as much.

I wouldnt dump him for hating a stupid holiday like christmas. However I would dump him for being such a hostile, inconsiderate shit who doesent seem to give a fuck for your feelings about this season.



If he's being as stubborn and as unpleasant as he is about something as small and unimportant as christmas, how insufferable is he going to be when it's something really,really important?

..And do you really want to be stuck with him when you find out just what that really important thing might be?

Promise him an extra special present in a *hint hint, know what I mean* kinda way.

Or threaten to take away his sex.

yoyo has a point. I suppose that is something I haven't really pondered over but I would hope that the difference would be obvious for the situation.

I do wonder a bit about Feb. 14th this year... Valentines day is the worst for commercialized holidays. But it is also my birthday. Actually having a bf for that season, (provided he lasts that long) it will be expected that any celebration would be done with him. But considering his attitudes, I wonder if he is going to leave me to fend for myself on that day? It wouldn't be the first birthday I spent alone because everyone else had dates.

He gets no sex yet.

And regardless, sex should not be used as a weapon. If I am mad at him that is one thing, but to hold out just because he wont do something is wrong.

[This message has been edited by Isabel (edited 12-16-2006).]

He wouldn't happen to be a totse-type geek with no social skills?

quote:Originally posted by Isabel:



If I am mad at him that is one thing, but to hold out just because he wont do something is wrong.



I think it's justified in your situation.

If he doesent give a fuck about what you're feeling, why should you care about him?

He seems to be really childish. Not liking something is one thing, but ruining it for other people is sad and pathetic.

Also, it shows quite a level of ignorance on his part if he wont even give christmas a chance with you. For all he knows, he might really love spending time with you!

Spend time with his girlfren'?

Then he won't have time to slip off for the gaythexxthors that he so much enjoys?

celebrate without him. spend the holiday with another guy.

actually that's pretty passive aggressive. warn him first?

tell him the way you feel. try to convince him of the good that's veiled behind the cheseyness of these holidays.

He should at least respect the fact that family is a part of your life and you're not willing to give up family time for him if he's going to act like that. He obviously knows that he's welcome to come and spend time with your family at xmas so i don't see why he's being such a shithead about it.

You really need to sit him down again for a proper talk about it - discuss your feelings - tell him what he's doing and acting like is upsetting you because family is important to you. Maybe try and find out why hes so against it (in detail, unless you already know). Make the offer for him to spend xmas with you and your family again and if he throws his toys then tell him he can spend xmas by himself and that you're going to see your family.

If hes a real asshole about it maybe its time to move on. If he can't handle that your family life is healthy and not all holidays are about the comerical side of things - but rather a reason/time for family and friends to come together, then he's probably not worth it.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

celebrate without him. spend the holiday with another guy.

actually that's pretty passive aggressive. warn him first?



Yeah you know, because making him jealous will not make him angry and even more depressed.

Your boyfriend is just stubborn and a loser.

My husband is a grinch too, but he at least makes an effort because he knows I like holidays.

Your boyfriend sounds like an ass clown.