Alright guys this may be a long post I don't know typing it as I go but to be honest without bragging I'm a wealthy person for someone my age, I make a lot more money then others especially from my parents (17 years old)

But I'm constantly stressed and miserable and irritated, I know why but I can't do anything about it. I work a construction job, my parents are the ones with a lot of money they give me as much as I need, but they want me to get in the "working world" instead of being a spoiled teenager. Which I respect I like to work.

But I hate how everyone at work dislikes me.. I can have all the money in the world but you just can't buy REAL friends or a girlfriend, sure you can flash your money around and have acquaintances.. but who wants that? I need real friends, a girlfriend just once in my life I'd like to have one girlfriend, I'm constantly nervous and stressed and under confident and freaking EVERYTHING, I can't take it today I went to the mall and bought a video game to play on Friday but I couldn't get it installed and that really pissed me off and then I bought new gym equipment but then realized I never use it, and then I saw people at the mall walking around with a partner or a group of friends just standing around talking and laughing, there is something I'd like to buy..... I bought all these expensive clothes and shoes and a nice car to try and impress people but then that just made everyone hate me even more because I wasn't "one of them.." and then I tried dressing normally and that made it even worse.

I don't know why I'm so disliked, I have problems socializing especially with girls, I havent had a real conversation with a girl since I was 14 maybe even 13 (Discluding family/relatives.)

I'm 5"10 weighing 139 and average looking blonde hair, kid I'm not posting pictures because yes I'm paranoid to......

Can someone please help me or give me advice? I'm tired of being miserable and waking up every morning regretting my life, I know girls are impressed by money but they're not impressed when the guy is a complete fool.

awww, thats so...sad...ill be your friend(yeah, im serious)? but, wanna try explaining how they treat you? i might be able to help...

Lol I appreciate that but this is the internet sadly

And they treat me normally, not like tease me or anything this isn't elementry school where there are bullys, but you know. I just get ignored in conversations, never get invited to anything they do..

who does this sound like...me? not the rich part, but i dont get invited...if you get ignored in a convo, you gotta get in there, just bust through, and if you're trying to be popular or something, try to be funny...and i mean in the good way

-Kman101

Give me some money to get me started in Sydney, so I can live in the same city as my girlfriend. That way, you'll feel better for helping someone, and I'll be with my girlfriend, and everyone wins.

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:

Give me some money to get me started in Sydney, so I can live in the same city as my girlfriend. That way, you'll feel better for helping someone, and I'll be with my girlfriend, and everyone wins.

selfish much? btw, how would you get the money? the kid here says hes not giving any of his info over teh intronet

quote:Originally posted by osessity:

I'm tired of being miserable and waking up every morning regretting my life

That's exactly it right there! You said it, you are tired of being miserable. So start taking chances, the only way you are going to be able to pick up girls, make real friends is by trying. Find out what to, and what not to do. If you are ever thinking about approaching a girl, and you get all nervous, just think of that line that you said "I'm tired of being miserable".

And stop trying to use your money to be someone else. Instead of looking for the most expensive clothes in the store, look for something that you actually like. Find something that's your favorite color. And you should probably post a picture on what you look like, to see if you are attractive or not.

And about the friends, if they already don't like you, don't try and become friends with them again, make NEW friends. Be friendly, but not overly friendly. That just gets weird... especially with girls.

Anyways, on that note, just remember, there is friends for EVERYBODY, you just have to find them. Maybe you won't become friends with the 'popular' kids, but who cares.

Just liiiive.

Good luck.

Edit: I just read that you are getting ignored in conversations. That is happening cause either A, you are boring, or B, YOU aren't vocal enough. If it's your boring, stop being so uptight about everything and learn to be laid back. Don't sweat the little things. I've learned to not really let anything bother me(sometimes backfires on me). Learn to have a sense of humour, watch comedies, and all that good stuff. And if you aren't vocal enough, then just talk more. But talk about things that goes along with the group. ie, if you are with a group of girls that you are trying to hook up with, don't bust out the whole speel on politics, or the latest in technology.

[This message has been edited by Chinese Food52 (edited 12-02-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Chinese Food52:

That's exactly it right there! You said it, you are tired of being miserable. So start taking chances, the only way you are going to be able to pick up girls, make real friends is by trying. Find out what to, and what not to do. If you are ever thinking about approaching a girl, and you get all nervous, just think of that line that you said "I'm tired of being miserable".

And stop trying to use your money to be someone else. Instead of looking for the most expensive clothes in the store, look for something that you actually like. Find something that's your favorite color. And you should probably post a picture on what you look like, to see if you are attractive or not.

And about the friends, if they already don't like you, don't try and become friends with them again, make NEW friends. Be friendly, but not overly friendly. That just gets weird... especially with girls.

Anyways, on that note, just remember, there is friends for EVERYBODY, you just have to find them. Maybe you won't become friends with the 'popular' kids, but who cares.

Just liiiive.

Good luck.

just noticed...this guys good!

-Kman101

quote:Originally posted by kman101:

just noticed...this guys good!

-Kman101

Haha thanks, I try!

Will read... sometime. Soon?

Loan me a grand. I'll pay you back with 10% interest. You can pretend that you lost the money on a bad investment and now have to make it all back, and the challenge will motivate you.

So, in the end, you'll have more money, more self esteem, you'll feel better, and you'll get laid more often, all because you lent me money.

Edit: I'll take the exercise equipment too. I need that stuff. Stationary bike?

[This message has been edited by CmereYou (edited 12-02-2006).]

The fact that you're "wealthy" has absolutely nothing to do with your lack of social skills, so why mention it? The very fact that you prefaced your entire thread with your financial status tells me that you probably do it in real life as well, which doesn't win friends.. especially among working class folks and young people.

Drop the (looka me every1 I have money!) mentality, stop being a cunt, and start talking to people like they're on your level. When you do that, people might actually want to talk to you.

You have lots of money and social anxiety? Maybe you should look around BLTC for a little help.

quote:Originally posted by bain surgeon:

You have lots of money and social anxiety? Maybe you should look around BLTC for a little help.

Yeah, you have a lot of options. Alcohol, Benzos, Coke, E, and many others.

Everyone wants they don't have, and the lower/middle class families often raise their kids to dislike anyone that makes more money than they. It's a sad display really, one that I'm sure will ever be fixed.

Just keep trying at it. If you found a person like me working there (why not?), I'd not judge you based on that. I'd judge your character.

Problem is, things are stacked way against you in your case.

"Hey, you know that new guy?"

"Yeah, what about him?"

"I hear he's fucking loaded and only working because he's bored."

"Fucking rich people."

I bet that happens a great deal, and it's disappointing. Money CAN'T buy happiness, in fact in many cases (yours included), money detracts from it.

But yeah, just get out there, do you wpok like the rest of them and maybe start a conversation with someone that doesn't seem to hate you. I wish yuh luck, yo.

quote:Originally posted by HandOfZek:

Everyone wants they don't have, and the lower/middle class families often raise their kids to dislike anyone that makes more money than they. It's a sad display really, one that I'm sure will ever be fixed.



Sorry, blaming others for him not having friends is unacceptable. The fault is yours, and I highly doubt it's due to the amount of money you have. If you really think money is the problem, donate it all to some charity. But you won't do that, will you?

It sounds to me like you have the fault most young men do when their parents are rich: You haven't gone through the work necessary to control you money; rather, it is controlling you.

Talk to your dad about it; I guarantee he can set you on the right path if you're honest about it. (You may not like his solutions, but it should do the job)

quote:Originally posted by HandOfZek:

Everyone wants they don't have, and the lower/middle class families often raise their kids to dislike anyone that makes more money than they. It's a sad display really, one that I'm sure will ever be fixed.

Yeah, it's pretty simple really. You run around flaunting wealth to people who don't have it, you're not going to make many friends. It's 10x worse in his case because it's not really his wealth. Like I said before, his (or his parents, I should say) income level has no bearing on the success of his social relationships. Bringing it up needlessly here tells us he's probably not very humble about it in real life situations either.

Having it and flaunting it are two different things, and most of these "lower/middle class" people you're talking don't really care. If he's driving around in a daddy-bought BMW, he's not going to be popular around grown people who have to work harder for less.

My next piece of advice for the OP. You want normal relationships? You want to repair your social problems? When you turn 18, move a thousand miles away from your family with only a couple months worth of bill payments in your bank account. Get a place of your own, get a job, and accept no money from your family for several years. Learn what it's like to earn your way in the world without their financial backing. When you've mastered that, then you can go off to whatever sort of higher education they're going to buy for you.. and be better prepared for social interaction with "low/middle class" folks.

quote:Originally posted by Captain Asshat:

The fact that you're "wealthy" has absolutely nothing to do with your lack of social skills, so why mention it? The very fact that you prefaced your entire thread with your financial status tells me that you probably do it in real life as well, which doesn't win friends.. especially among working class folks and young people.



No doubt. Fake modesty doesn't fool anyone.

I suggest you use your money and get into a good martial arts class or something. Try Jiu Jitsu. You'll make friends and you'll learn how to kick your enemys' asses.

I've had to study to get scholarships to put myself through a public university, because my parents have no money to give me. Seriously, when you work for something it becomes so easy to resent people who get things without any effort on their part. Having daddy buy a BMW for you and then showing it off as if you earned it, what's the point? I hate the asshats who do that. Don't take your parents' money. Or take it and just invest some and donate the rest to charity. Tons of shit around your house won't make you happy. People can make you happy. Just realize you're human; we're all human. No one wants to be made to feel inferior. Treat others like people, and you won't have problems. And don't be an asshat who flaunts possessions he didn't earn, or any possessions at all for that matter.

So many prejudices around money. It makes me smile with disgust.

It is only money, anybody can make it if they have the desire or drive.

If you have the drive or desire, you had better hope that the priorities and reasoning behind the motivation are sound.

Edit: Pride in money is simply foolish. Money is a means to an end, not an end.

[This message has been edited by Euda (edited 12-03-2006).]

osessity, being raised wealthy is as much a ghetto as being raised poor. You can take a boy out of the ghetto but you can't take the ghetto out of the boy.

The reason people shy away from you or dislike you is YOU. Not the money, not your parentage and not because of what car you drive.

I've met some really rich people over the years (and by 'really rich' i mean personal fortunes in the tens of millions). Some inherited their wealth and some were self made. Some were great people and some were arseholes...exactly like the poor people I know!

Years ago I saw Bill Gates on TV , when he was in Germany. The presenter asked him to pull out his wallet and show everyone the contents. He had four hundred marks and a credit card.He was also extremely like-able in a geeky sort of way.

I could quite easily imagine spending time with the guy and enjoying his company.

I expect your problem is you need to stop 'smelling' of wealth. Go find someone who 1.isn't wealthy and 2. who knows you and ask them what it is about you that puts people off.

Their answers will probably surprise you.

quote:Originally posted by Euda:

It is only money, anybody can make it if they have the desire or drive.

Really? Tell me how. The only sure route to money I know of is the medical field, and if you want to be a halfway-decent doctor you won't have any time to yourself. I know of two doctors in this city alone who say if they had to do it all over again, they'd pick something else.

So... how do I get rich, Euda the Wise?

quote:Originally posted by Twisted_Ferret:

Originally posted by Euda:

It is only money, anybody can make it if they have the desire or drive.

Really? Tell me how. The only sure route to money I know of is the medical field, and if you want to be a halfway-decent doctor you won't have any time to yourself. I know of two doctors in this city alone who say if they had to do it all over again, they'd pick something else.

So... how do I get rich, Euda the Wise?

sell drugs.

quote:Originally posted by Twisted_Ferret:

So... how do I get rich?

What can you do?

There is nothing wrong with "driving your daddy's BMW" to school everyday cause I did for most of my high school years. It doesnt help you get friends but it does help you get a hot girlfriend. Some ppl do get jealious thats why you dont discuss your wealth unless someone asks you about it and even then dont go overboard into details. Having a car in high school is a big plus, first time I got laid was in my car. You also end up getting invited to a lot of things cause your the guy with the car. I personally had no problem being known as the rich boy. Better than being some unknown average guy.

quote:Originally posted by Twisted_Ferret:

So... how do I get rich



10 years ago - get involved in the technology industry.

5 years ago - get involved in the real estate market.

Today - get involved in China.

Intelligent, active, hard working people will find their way to the top, with a little luck of course.



To the OP - your problems have nothing to do with your wealth. The fact that you even bring it up is indicative of the real problem: you're socially clueless. Unfortunately there's no obvious remedy to this, although personally I would recommend psychedelic drugs.

quote:Originally posted by osessity:

Alright guys this may be a long post I don't know typing it as I go but to be honest without bragging I'm a wealthy person for someone my age, I make a lot more money then others especially from my parents (17 years old)

But I'm constantly stressed and miserable and irritated, I know why but I can't do anything about it. I work a construction job, my parents are the ones with a lot of money they give me as much as I need, but they want me to get in the "working world" instead of being a spoiled teenager. Which I respect I like to work.

But I hate how everyone at work dislikes me.. I can have all the money in the world but you just can't buy REAL friends or a girlfriend, sure you can flash your money around and have acquaintances.. but who wants that? I need real friends, a girlfriend just once in my life I'd like to have one girlfriend, I'm constantly nervous and stressed and under confident and freaking EVERYTHING, I can't take it today I went to the mall and bought a video game to play on Friday but I couldn't get it installed and that really pissed me off and then I bought new gym equipment but then realized I never use it, and then I saw people at the mall walking around with a partner or a group of friends just standing around talking and laughing, there is something I'd like to buy..... I bought all these expensive clothes and shoes and a nice car to try and impress people but then that just made everyone hate me even more because I wasn't "one of them.." and then I tried dressing normally and that made it even worse.

I don't know why I'm so disliked, I have problems socializing especially with girls, I havent had a real conversation with a girl since I was 14 maybe even 13 (Discluding family/relatives.)

I'm 5"10 weighing 139 and average looking blonde hair, kid I'm not posting pictures because yes I'm paranoid to......

Can someone please help me or give me advice? I'm tired of being miserable and waking up every morning regretting my life, I know girls are impressed by money but they're not impressed when the guy is a complete fool.

i can help you out, if you have aim, mine's: Lucifuge556

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:



10 years ago - get involved in the technology industry.

5 years ago - get involved in the real estate market.

Today - get involved in China.

Intelligent, active, hard working people will find their way to the top, with a little luck of course.



To the OP - your problems have nothing to do with your wealth. The fact that you even bring it up is indicative of the real problem: you're socially clueless. Unfortunately there's no obvious remedy to this, although personally I would recommend psychedelic drugs.



Dad made huge amounts of money in your first two but now hes mainly in gold/silver and some other commodities to a lesser extent. But then again you could argue commodities are rising mainly becuase of China.

quote:Originally posted by dan105:

now hes mainly in gold/silver





In 5 years he'll be laughing at everyone who kept their money in real estate. The crash isn't going to be pretty.

quote:Originally posted by Euda:

What can you do?

I'm not the best at mathematics or athletics. I'm competent in everything else I've tried. I like to think I'm best at philosophy and writing, but I've never seriously tried to write something and often find that all of my philosophical ideas have been thought of already. Somewhat flattering, since I've found that such luminaries as Socrates have had the same thoughts I did; but I worry I've used up all my brilliance.

The problem with the things you listed, fullcircle, is that they do require some luck. Of course, everything does to some degree - but some things are a lot more sure than others. I can't think of any way to be reasonable certain of wealth. Even if I do turn out to be an incredibly talented writer, people might not buy my books. Philosophy is a notoriously monetarily-disadvantaged field. I can't be certain of brilliance as an investor, and there's always the chance of things going horribly wrong; a large one, I think, since tons of people are involved in investing and playing the stock market and so forth, and very few seem to get wealthy. The thing I always liked about the medical field is that people always need doctors, and there are very few of them in the U.S. right now... but I don't think I could be happy slaving my entire life at something I don't like very much. So I'm stumped as to how I can acquire even a little $$$.

[This message has been edited by Twisted_Ferret (edited 12-04-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Twisted_Ferret:

Even if I do turn out to be an incredibly talented writer, people might not buy my books.

You're correct. Literary fiction (not popular fiction) makes up less than 1% of books sold in the US. People like poorly-written works like The Da Vinci Code rather than books that are well-written from talented writers.

If you wanted to write poetry to make a living, see Ted Kooser's The Poetry Home Repair Manual. He's a former US Poet Laureate, and in his book he specifically says that you will not make enough money to make a living as a poet.

So, in short, you're right.

look man, you do need to work, but pick something that you want to do, and just be nice to people, don't be an uptight ass about things, joke around a little, talk to people, don't be a snob, it's easy.

quote:Originally posted by Fanglekai:

You're correct. Literary fiction (not popular fiction) makes up less than 1% of books sold in the US. People like poorly-written works like The Da Vinci Code rather than books that are well-written from talented writers.

If you wanted to write poetry to make a living, see Ted Kooser's The Poetry Home Repair Manual. He's a former US Poet Laureate, and in his book he specifically says that you will not make enough money to make a living as a poet.

So, in short, you're right.

I'm simultaneously pleased that someone I like as much as Fanglekai agrees, and depressed that he is agreeing with something I had hoped to be told I was wrong about.



[This message has been edited by Twisted_Ferret (edited 12-05-2006).]