Jealousy.

As soon as I get a twinge that another boy is interested in my girl, and that she may be interested in him, I go nuts.

I'm learning to control this as I mature.

The point of this thread is to let others who get jealous know they aren't alone.

I'm the exact same way.

I feel you man. Jealousy is what has caused me and my girl MANY problems. Im a sucker for it.

I've been very jealous before. In my experience, good self-esteem and having a girlfriend who isn't a flirtatious slut in denial generally helps.

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:

a girlfriend who isn't a flirtatious slut in denial

How odd, i head those were extinct.

Thats what you get for letting your woman go out in public.

quote:Originally posted by SilentMind:

Thats what you get for letting your woman go out in public without a hijab.

quote:Originally posted by Psionicist:

How odd, i head those were extinct.

I managed to snag the last one LOLZ I LUV MY GF!!1!!

I probobly would have the same feelings stab.

But all the girls i've been with don't show any affection towards other guys (when im around).

So it's not an issue.

Peace,

Wait. Other people get jealous? Oh my god. That explains why there's a word for the concept that's in common usage today. Amazing.

quote:Originally posted by SilentMind:

Thats what you get for letting your woman go out in public.

QFT

Yeah, you really have to stop it immediately. I used to have it bad, now it's almost gone with just the last dollops of shit left that i'm trying to scrape away.

Stab-stab i thought you should know...

In every relationship there is jealousy. But at the end of the day they are with you at night, and not some other guy.



And yes. I do get jealous.



[This message has been edited by Jack_and_Jill (edited 11-19-2006).]

I usually get jealous when I'm wound up. Bad qualities start spewing forth, and in relationships, this is my worst. All that needs to be done, is to calm down.

Just like you, BluryVision, I am getting far better at controlling it as I mature.

Jack and Jill, yes, the best mantra is "she's with me, not him". Works, too.

Me and my boyfriend are both ridiculously flirtatious. Neither of us gets jealous of the other, it was kinda tough in the begining, cause he's the type of guy with confidence that girls will smell from a mile away and the same is with me with guys, I tease and flirt with them non stop, and he seems comfortable with that. If the couple is comfortable with themselves they wouldn't be jealous to a level that would cause an argument or dispute.

I suppose it depends on the couple and their confidence in eachother.

There's a diff between being jealous and possessive, so keep that in mind.

Eil>

im a very jealous guy. but the feeling is eased when i remember im a big strong jock type guy.

I don't. My girl friend was gonna had sex with my best friend and i didn't get mad. I'm an easy going kind-o-guy

quote:Originally posted by Sigillum Diaboli:

I don't. My girl friend was gonna had sex with my best friend and i didn't get mad. I'm an easy going kind-o-guy

That's not being easy going, that's more on the careless guy, that's not too good, in my opinion!

Eil> ..but then again I don't think my bf would leave me if I cheated on him and not only dropped hints on his best friend cause he wouldn't want to lose me, but he knows that it's not a thing i'd do. Trust is an important thing to have in a relationship.

Eil>

Hmm, Quacky, where is the line between jealousy and posessiveness in your opinion?

go out side everyday to a hill. lay on the ground and stare at the clouds,and think about life. soon youll start feeling laid back about everything.

Too tanked to weigh in just now, but just wanted to bump this... Very interesting thread!

Keep it going.

Hmm, Quacky, where is the line between jealousy and posessiveness in your opinion?[/QUOTE]

Jealousy is thinking that you need to keep a watchful eye on your partner in order to stand reassured that they will not cheat on you, in the essence of guarding them from flirting, and being with others for the fear of them cheating on which is born of insecurity, envy and low self-esteem. Jealous people don't take into consideration how their behaviour might affect their partners and lose sight of that, so not only are they acting jealousy from themselves, they are also selfish. This can lead to disputes, arguments, resentment and an end to a relationship.



Possessiveness is wanting to dominate and control the other person because you don’t want them to be with anyone else or do anything without telling you. In my opinion possessiveness is like you know the person is not gonna do anything but you're controlling them to a certain extent and its really bad, because possessive people tend to abuse their partners more often than anyone in a healthy relationship.



I love my boyfriend to death, I can see him being a permanent person in my life and plan on spending the rest of my life with him, and he feels the same way, I have him and I know I have him, and can't be jealous nor possessive for that fact and the other factor being that I am not a jealous person, I just like to work harder to have bigger and better things, cause I worked for them!

Neither being jealous nor being possessive is healthy for a relationship, if you are putting time, effort, emotion and possibly money into keeping an relationship going atleast invest in honest communication and becoming confident with eachother enough to know one will not cheat on the other. A relationship has to have compromise, agreement and everything that comprises a relationship should be equally shared, responsibilities and benefits.

Hope that you grasped my thought.

Eil>

Great post! So you deplore both. I understand your position now, and appreciate your wisdom. *bows*

quote:Originally posted by stab:

Great post! So you deplore both. I understand your position now, and appreciate your wisdom. *bows*

I appreciate that and I'm glad that was helpful.



Eil>