This thread is for people to discuss and provide tips on how to flirt properly.

I'm not a bad flirter, but I'd say that my level drops the more attractive the girl in question is. Because, and I think this is universal, the hotter a girl is the more intimidating it is to hit on her.

Now the reason why this is a problem is because when I'm CONSCIOUSLY trying to flirt, it becomes much much more difficult.

On the other hand, when it's with a girl who I'm just moderately attracted to, the flirting is so much easier, and doesn't really require much effort to pull off.

So I've thought about the mechanisms of flirting to try and be better at it with hotter girls, but all I can come up with is that it's the kind of jokes you'd make about being attracted to a female friend, when you're not really being serious.

Advice, comments, etc?

I don't concentrate on how good looking they are. I just act myself and talk to whoever. There's this really pretty girl in work, and fuck she does my head in. Uses her facial appearance to get people to help her do EVERYTHING. She asked me to drag her pallets of stock back into the warehouse. And it being toilet paper, I said "no do it yourself it's not heavy".

Too much emphasis on who's hot and who's not. Yes I take notice of how they look but when it comes to flirting I'm just blunt. Ie "can I have your number?" Simple as fuck.

EDIT: If you find yourself being self conscious about someone you REALLY like just pretend it's your best mate or something. OR do what I do when I go out drinking - remember that you only get one shot at life so who gives a flying fuck if you look like a mong somewhere down the line. More chances.

[This message has been edited by Ho ho ho Green Giant (edited 11-17-2006).]

Suggest sex in a way that it's only one of many meanings, but is the implied meaning.

The problem with flirting is its so hit and miss. SOmething works great in one particular circumstance but totally fails in another, or works on one girl in the same circumstances but not a different girl. Im like you i have problems consciously flirting, especially with girls im just trying to 'pick up.' Generally i just do what i feel like and say to myself 'Well at least im being up front from the beginning, not acting a certain way to try and get her attention.'

It's not very successful though.

*flirts like uncoordinated inebriated buffalo*

*sulks, drinks beer instead*

Flirting should be natural, not forced. If you choke up, your game sucks. Game can be learned and mastered, but only through trial and error

I flirt naturally.

quote:Originally posted by jvm222:

I flirt naturally.

So do I, read my post again.

I'm completely and absolutely incapable of flirting.

But I'd rather that than be one of those girls who always flirt to get their way.



Theoretically though, the key is eye contact. There have been psychological studies, which I can't be bothered to link to, showing that 'prolonged eye contact can trigger strong affectionate feelings between strangers of the opposite sex' or something along those lines. Can't remember where I read that, so don't stress if it's not exact.

Anyone watched Torchwood (UK people)? Captain Jack - he holds eye contact with Teh Ladies as they talk. Sexy as.

Jx

Would you like a drink

*6 bottles of tart fuel later*

Just don't think about her in that manner. Make yourself just want to chat and don't think about plowing her half-way to Sunday, and you should find it easy.

Although, if she asks you if you'd like to plow her half-way to Sunday, make sure you post pictures. ;p

i'm the same as you, fullcircle. i can flirt well if i think the guy's "in my league." but if i think he's not, i get more nervous and stiff. it's funny, when i think i look prettier and therefore in a higher "league," my flirting improves a lot. in general flirting is all about the eye contact, smiles, tone of voice, and body language. you can be talking about gaussian elimination and make it flirtatious with the right tone/body language/facial expression. (oh, the things you learn at an all-nerd school!) my flirting has been terrible lately since i've felt so uggums. meh.

i used to flirt with literally everyone, girls and guys, in a light manner. it was great for making friends and being social. don't really do it too much now, but it's a good policy because it gets people interested and it makes it easier to flirt with the hotties if you already flirt with EVERYONE.

[This message has been edited by lauren7249 (edited 11-17-2006).]

^Do you know what a geisha is? Do you understand the power that a woman has?

Girls flirting should be considered an oxymoron. They don't go together, girls don't NEED or have to flirt.

A guy could be completely turned on by your shyness and nervousness around him, a guy could be turned off by your bullshit antics that you think is "good" flirting.

Understand?

quote:Originally posted by CarbonB:

[...]girls don't NEED or have to flirt.

Ah, but not all things in life need to be done. Flirting is a rather fun thing to do. I know I've gotten more than my share of numbers from girls that most would consider out of their league because I'm a really good flirt.

I don't hold anything back, and I don't act like I want to rape them on the spot. I just act playful, fun, and above all, friendly with just a splash of sexual flare. That's the winning key to getting more numbers than you might ever even know what to do with (and don't give your number out, EVER. An e-mail is alright, though, but not your number. Trust me, ok?)

quote:Originally posted by CarbonB:

^Do you know what a geisha is? Do you understand the power that a woman has?

Girls flirting should be considered an oxymoron. They don't go together, girls don't NEED or have to flirt.

A guy could be completely turned on by your shyness and nervousness around him, a guy could be turned off by your bullshit antics that you think is "good" flirting.

Understand?

I agree completely. Girls that are too outgoing seem really slutty, and it's a huge turnoff.

quote:Originally posted by Jessic:

I'm completely and absolutely incapable of flirting.

But I'd rather that than be one of those girls who always flirt to get their way.



Theoretically though, the key is eye contact. There have been psychological studies, which I can't be bothered to link to, showing that 'prolonged eye contact can trigger s trong affectionate feelings between strangers of the opposite sex' or something along those lines. Can't remember where I read that, so don't stress if it's not exact.

Anyone watched Torchwood (UK people)? Captain Jack - he holds eye contact with Teh Ladies as they talk. Sexy as.

Jx

hmmm... bery bery intereseting... I must say, I have the same problem as fullcircle, im a crazy flirting machine unconsciously though when I'm trying to flirt with a specific girl, I backfire

quote:Originally posted by Gus:

Ah, but not all things in life need to be done. Flirting is a rather fun thing to do. I know I've gotten more than my share of numbers from girls that most would consider out of their league because I'm a really good flirt.

I don't hold anything back, and I don't act like I want to rape them on the spot. I just act playful, fun, and above all, friendly with just a splash of sexual flare. That's the winning key to getting more numbers than you might ever even know what to do with (and don't give your number out, EVER. An e-mail is alright, though, but not your number. Trust me, ok?)

Uh.......why would I trust your advice on anything sexual? I don't give my number out. Flirting is just a fucking word to describe what should come naturally.

Meaning if you are confident and self-assured your "flirting" or as I like to call it talking, is going to elicit more responses from the opposite sex.

I'm not looking to get pussy, just read through the numerous girls threads on here and realize that it the majority of girls in America. They give the pussy away, it's almost not even an enjoyment to bed with some random slut.

I'd rather jack-off and save the energy.

^ So you're justifying masturbation > sex, and trying to disprove the difference between flirting and talking.

Well, my hand feels a lot better than pussy *cough* And my friends always get offended when I take my talking too far, especially my teachers, coworkers and disabled-retard aquantences.

^Um......are you going to talk differently to a 90 year old woman as opposed to an attractive 22 year old woman? Yes, the difference in speech patterns is what you refer to as flirting. I refer to is as selective speaking.

I am not saying that masturbation is better than sex, that was your assumption based on what you thought I meant.

What I am saying is that it really isn't worth my time to sleep with some random slut, which was in reference to Gus saying he gets lots of numbers. Who gives a shit if you get lots of numbers, all they are is numbers. No real foundation, and if you get married to a girl that you called from random flirting good for you.

That just isn't me, and that just isn't how I look for girls that I want to be with.

quote:Originally posted by CarbonB:

I look for girls that HAVE THE SAME CUPSIZE AS ME LOL BECAUSE THEN WE GET TO SAVE MONEY ON BRAS LOL AND WE CAN TRADE BRAS LOL ETTC LOL

fixed

^ I don't think he cares about the fat thing.

Selective speaking... interesting. However, that is just a broad definition under which flirting certainly comes.

Selective speaking with the intention of sex.

quote:Originally posted by CarbonB:



a guy could be turned off by your bullshit antics that you think is "good" flirting.

Understand?

you're projecting something you've experienced in other people onto me. you're assuming a whole bunch of stuff that isn't true. you're way off base. i'm not getting into semantics or rephrasing what i said, but you're definitely perceiving something that isn't there.

I don't flirt. Flirting is just a bunch of beating around the bush bullshit.

I talk to someone. If I think they're cool, I say, "Hey man you're pretty cool, we should hang out sometime."

I proceede to hang out and build a relationship.

If it turns out to be a love relationship, so be it.

If it doesn't, oh well, still friends.

quote:Originally posted by Jessic:

I'm completely and absolutely incapable of flirting.

But I'd rather that than be one of those girls who always flirt to get their way.



Theoretically though, the key is eye contact. There have been psychological studies, which I can't be bothered to link to, showing that 'prolonged eye contact can trigger strong affectionate feelings between strangers of the opposite sex' or something along those lines. Can't remember where I read that, so don't stress if it's not exact.

Anyone watched Torchwood (UK people)? Captain Jack - he holds eye contact with Teh Ladies as they talk. Sexy as.

Jx

So what you're saying is that I need to go up to random women and challenge them to a staring contest?

Sounds like a plan.

quote:Originally posted by jvm222:

I flirt naturally.

you don´t. you only flirt naturally if you don´t ven know you do ..

DADDY!!!!!lol. i'll flirt with ya



i know, i am a dork

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

it's funny, when i think i look prettier and therefore in a higher "league," my flirting improves a lot.



qft.

for some reason i naturally flirt. i found that out like 2 years ago. from the point i found out on i had a huge confidence boost since i knew i had nothing to lose. just talk and youll be alright most people dont notice or dont care