well, i spent the better part of my life pretty indifferent and passive to my surroundings. i was content, but it wasn't anything beyond that.

during this phase, i had brief periods where i would become extremely happy, to the point where it was almost too much.. but they faded quickly.

anyway, this leads to the present. the other week, i got into an argument with the parents and ended up punching a hole through my wall and ever since i have not been able to get the agression out of me.

i've been looking for petty excuses to fight (i was once almost totally pacisfist). i also have been testing out what i can and can't punch through, not out of anger, but out of curiousity. i've had a desire to be punched lately too, just to see how much pain i can endure, because i've noticed that i can take a beating without much pain.

now, i think this is my family's history of depression manifesting itself, but i honestly have no clue what's wrong with me.

You're sexually frustrated.

Take that damn sausage outta your ass Jimmy!

quote:Originally posted by Captain Asshat:

You're sexually frustrated.

Yeah, I know how that is.

Bottled up anger can come out in weird ways. I suggest getting into a sport that'll let you take out your physical aggression in a controlled environment.

quote:Originally posted by heisler2:

Bottled up anger can come out in weird ways. I suggest getting into a sport that'll let you take out your physical aggression in a controlled environment.

LIKE FACE FUCKING

Yeah dude, you just need an outlet.

Take up martial arts, and find a girlfriend. I guarantee you it'll take care of itself after that.

quote:Originally posted by SilentMind:

Yeah dude, you just need an outlet.

Take up martial arts, and use them on your girlfriend. I guarantee you it'll take care of itself after that.

fiks'ed

sounds like you're either sexually frustrated, or just are getting a severe testosterone flooding.

maybe it's the drugs, too. getting a girlfriend and doing sports will do the job.

Take up a sport.

Try boxing, that may be good for you.

what is it that you were fighting about?

Fight Club/puberty.

quote:Originally posted by 556:

during this phase, i had brief periods where i would become extremely happy, to the point where it was almost too much.. but they faded quickly.

No alarm bells for any one else?

Meh...okay.

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

No alarm bells for any one else?

Meh...okay.



Well, this:

quote:Originally posted by 556:

now, i think this is my family's history of depression manifesting itself





Go see a doctor?

I've always found that depression isnt angering...just sad. Like...just...depressing. Try Mighty Warrior Screams. They tend to let out a lot of anger, without actually breaking anything.

I want to hit people all the time. I have wanted to start a fight club since before it was a book.

i dunno, it just makes things interesting- pain does.

like when i used to skate, i would purposely try ridiculous gaps, that i knew weren't possible with my lack of talent. i would inevitably smack the pavement and cut something up pretty bad. it never really hurt, but it always gave me some sort of satisfaction.

then last night i was at a party, and i was bored, then a thought to cure my boredom comes to mind- get someone to punch me in the jaw. i proceed to walk up to a friend and ask him, and then he looks at me like i'm fucking crazy or something.

i honestly don't see it as that big of a deal, it's not like i'm torturing myself. it's just healthy to endure a little bit of hell to make the good things in life seem that much better i think. like standing outside in the cold for 5 minutes just so when you go back in, it'll feel warmer than it did before you went out.

it just seems like i'm retardly self-destructive, like i subconsciously sabotage myself.

i dunno, does anyone else see this as something that is going to ruin me? as something i should see someone for? it seems managable to me, and doesn't really seem to affect me all that negatively but..



[This message has been edited by 556 (edited 11-20-2006).]

bump. i just want some educated insights to the matter.

i honestly feel like it isn't harming my lifestyle at all, other than that i'm perceived as odd by some.

i just feel like since this is my one shot here, i need to experience more than your average person.

i dunno, maybe i just have a superiority complex or something.

quote:Originally posted by firekitty751:

Fight Club/puberty.

Damn you stole it from me.

To each their own, I suppose. You're just testing your boundaries in a way that you like. I'll do the same type of shit from time to time, just to see what something's like.

Like others said though, it would be good if you could channel your anger into a sprt or something. Sounds like you'd make a great boxer.