I seem to suffer from psychological impotence.

I can easily get a boner and maintain it during masturbation and looking at porn. I get them during the night and I wake up with them, and I am only 19, so clearly this is not a physiological problem.

My girlfriend is quite hot and I am strongly attracted to her, I'm horny all the time, and yet I can't get hard when I'm with her, which fucking sucks. We can't have good sex. Sometimes I am able to start out hard, but as soon as we start having sex I end up losing it.

I can't think of any reason why. I have great self esteem, and I think of myself as an attractive person.

Any ideas for what's causing this? Has anybody had a similar problem?

Please help me totse.

That must be embarrassing.....

Does she think that you cummed??? or know the Ship was sunk???

When your banging her, think about things that turn you right on..... Just keep thinking "Gooood" thoughts and your ship should stay floated...

Wow... That sucks. Maybe you are subconsciously gay? I really dont know, what turns you on? Have you had her do more of the things that excite you?

What about oral? Does it retain its stature for that?

Go see a sex-counsellor. I'm serious, this is one of the very few areas where 'therapy' works.

Many years ago i had the exact same problem. I went and had a chat with the counsellor from 'Marriage Guidance' (although we weren't married but back then you were assumed to be!).

A hour or so later i returned to the appartment and damn near raped her!

The cause? Well turned out i had a subconcious mental block because she was black (i'm white). I had been brought up in apure white enviroment and in that atomosphere of polite racism only the English can do.

[This message has been edited by jackketch (edited 11-02-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Kah:



I can easily get a boner and maintain it during masturbation and looking at porn.

You watch too much porn with porn stars hotter than your g/f and it screws you up in the head. Stop watchin porn.

Does it happen with any kind of sexual activity, or just penetration?

Depends, I find it that when I hang out with a girl, I dont have to fap, even for a couple of days. Maybe your body just doesnt want/need sex?

thats just a bit wierd...but intreging none the less.

Could be the your thinking *fuking = hard work = tiring = nakerd afterwards* and generally during excersize your brain is hardly focusing on getting a boner and instead diverting blood to other areas. In the case of sex, you need a damn good ammount of blood in your abs, legs and arms...positions differ obviously.

If your using jonnies, dont - ask her to take the pill for a couple of months to see if that makes a difference...I found with my ex that jonnies ruined the feeling, and I ended up going soft.

This happened to me too, once. I lost it during an absolutely shitty handjob and for three, maybe four weeks afterwards, it vanished as soon as anything properly sexual started. But eventually I managed to get it through to my brain that my penis was a-ok and it was just that one thing that had caused a problem. Been fine ever since, it's like I self-counselled. If you don't want to get actual counselling, try to identify the cause of it yourself.

Reconnect with your cock.

quote:Originally posted by Xerxes35:

You watch too much porn with porn stars hotter than your g/f and it screws you up in the head. Stop watchin porn.



hahahahahaaaa

Wow, thank you so much totse.

To Hippie Hunter: Yes, I had suspected for a while that I might be subconsciously gay. I am bisexual, although as far as I can tell I prefer women, but it might be something that society has pushed onto me, so I don't know for sure.

Xerxes35: Good idea, I've stopped watching porn now.

fullcircle: It only happens with sex. Blowjobs, handjobs and tittyfucking all get me off fine.

neville122333: This is also a major problem, I think. When we're fucking, my mind is too much on if she is enjoying it, stuff like that. Not hot. No boner.

I wish she could be on the pill, but she enjoys her periods so she won't (although I haven't asked her about it with regard to solving my problem). The condoms really do suck though, without frenulum stimulation it's a lot harder for me to get off but I'm working on being able to masturbate while wearing a condom. Hopefully that will make a difference.

I'll see if I can self-counsel myself out of this.

All of you will be eternally appreciated.

quote:Originally posted by stab:

Reconnect with your cock.

An ancient art practiced by Tibetan monks there is, called "Zen Cock" is it. Connect with the spirituality of your penis, and your ship will set sail on the journey toward fulfillment.

maybe ur nervous, or worried and not really concentrating on sex? or its that ur gay.

quote:Originally posted by Kah:

[BI wish she could be on the pill, but she enjoys her periods so she won't (although I haven't asked her about it with regard to solving my problem).[/B]

It's hardly relevant but she can be on the pill and still have her period. There are 28 days packages with 7 placebo pills that allow for a period, and there are 21 day packages that allow the same thing. I'd suggest she give it a try anyhow, it's safer than condoms and allows greater sensation, which may help you with your problem.