So last week I went out with this guy. It was a first date. We had lunch and saw a relatively lame movie. He was kind of cute. His best feature was that he was tall. Overall, within my range, in my league, up to my standards, whatever you want to call it.

Anyway, since that date he has sent me over a dozen text messages. Some have just been a result of me responding, etc. They ranged from "hey" and "whats up" to "thought about you last night" and "let me know if you want to go ice skating beautiful." Now he's got one of those sidekick style thingys with a full keyboard so it's a bit easier for him to text. but still, i'm a little baffled by his apparent interest.

we are meeting tomorrow to go ice skating. on our last date i said something about ice skating mostly being for families and maybe romantic dates. i wasn't hinting; he'd asked me if i did any "ice sports" and i was merely responding. but about 5 minutes later he asked me if i wanted to go ice skating. hmmm....

so in short i'm a bit nervous. he seems normal, not clingy or stalkerish. so i don't think he's a weirdo. but i wasn't expecting all those text messages. i looked pretty good on our date, better than i usually look. (it's because at the last minute i decided to wear a skirt, without a sweatshirt.) so i'm nervous that on our next date (tomorrow) i will act weird or different or look worse or something. and that he will realize his original assessment of me was wrong. and if he doesn't, then i'm worried there's something wrong with him. kind of a catch 22 huh?

anyway. i decided that rather than keeping this nervousness to fester in my brain and turn sour, i'd air it on totse and see if any of you lovelies had anything to say, words of wisdom, flames, or otherwise.

addendum: i know, i know, i come off as very insecure and annoying in all my threads. whereas when i post answers i seem more assured. it's just because i have a much clearer head when evaluating others' problems than assessing my own, because emotions often trump reason and i need help. so sorry guys. and thanks for always listening.

[This message has been edited by lauren7249 (edited 10-26-2006).]

He's showing interest, and trying to be friendly. If he's psycho he'd be showing up at your work. Texting is pretty innocuous. Don't worry about it. He asked about ice sports, maybe he's into hockey or something and wanted to skate with you. Don't read so much into it.

quote:Originally posted by Fanglekai:

He's showing interest, and trying to be friendly. If he's psycho he'd be showing up at your work. Texting is pretty innocuous. Don't worry about it. He asked about ice sports, maybe he's into hockey or something and wanted to skate with you. Don't read so much into it.



right, i figured as much. so his interest is normal, right? and i should just be myself on the next date? but try to look good?

Dont go for him too easy. Play cat & mouse subtely (sp?) and thatll fuck his psyche up and he will just ache for you. 'tleast thats what ive lived through.

And yeah, if he's talking and asking you out then that means that he digs you.

Are you is first girlfriend? He's just nervous and trying to make sure you know he likes you. Make sure he knows you do and he'll calm down.

Lauren.. you're paranoid because a guy likes you?!

I guess this says a bit about what you think of yourself..



relax a bit. Appreciate the fact that this guy is really,really into you, and like yourself some. And have fun.

quote:Originally posted by Strakynyar Krongoth:

Are you is first girlfriend? He's just nervous and trying to make sure you know he likes you. Make sure he knows you do and he'll calm down.

woah woah woah buddy...who said anything about being his girlfriend? and yeah he mentioned previous girlfriends.

quote:Originally posted by LiquidIce:

Dont go for him too easy. Play cat & mouse subtely (sp?) and thatll fuck his psyche up and he will just ache for you. 'tleast thats what ive lived through.

And yeah, if he's talking and asking you out then that means that he digs you.



what would be the point of this? it would go against my principles. it takes a certain amount of trust and/or guts to come on to someone and i'd want to reward that openness, not exploit it.

edit - ps thanks yoyo. and yes i am nervous that a guy likes me, because it means i have something to lose.

[This message has been edited by lauren7249 (edited 10-26-2006).]

Well, at least he's not calling you 50 times a day. Seems innocent enough, maybe you should just give it a try.

Then again, if I was him, I would never text message you to begin with. Or call. So there you go.

If im taking a female on a romantic second date it is for one reason, and only one- I want to fuck her quick without all the dating bullshit that comes along with it.

Showering you with constant text messages is just his way of trying to get to know you/show you how much he likes you.

dont wry about it he aint crazy, he just likes you and wants ta do what u like. he probly texted u because he was nervous, like in movies when a guy gets the number of a cute girl and ends up calling her 8 times in one night. (Im thinking of Swingers)

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

woah woah woah buddy...who said anything about being his girlfriend? and yeah he mentioned previous girlfriends.



In that case your screwed, or not in this case.

Failing that he might just be the talkative kind of guy, given that girls like to talk a lot he has proberly gotten used to it from his previous girlfriends.

Tell him you've lost your mobile.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:



what would be the point of this? it would go against my principles. it takes a certain amount of trust and/or guts to come on to someone and i'd want to reward that openness, not exploit it.



So, it all varies on the guy, gal and the approach, I only told you this because I have found it to work miracles in many cases, but if your not that kind of chick then dont do it, be honest and admit to him that you just like him, dont proclaim everlasting love because that might freak him out. Anyways, the cat&mouse technique needs to be refined and written, might be Ill get around to it if I have a minute or more (but that technique is faulty since now im not so into her as she would expect, since I realised she's playing the game I decided to play too ).

Anyways, cheers, dont try and be better then you can be, just be yourself, maintain basic hygene and add something from yourself like some perfumes or something.

Good luck.

quote:Originally posted by Fanglekai:

He's showing interest, and trying to be friendly. If he's psycho he'd be showing up at your work.

Yepp.

He thought you were hinting, obviously. He likes you and wants to try and do something in which you showed interest. He wants to do something with you and you provided an easy answer to the second date.

You don't have to try and look beautiful; you're stuck with that, blame your parents.

Smile and have fun.

Edit: He sounded like a text messege kind of guy; they're easy for him to send and he probably fires them off all the time. I wouldn't give it a second thought.

[This message has been edited by Euda (edited 10-26-2006).]

Awww, he likes you. Just go with it.

he just likes you more than a little bit, he's interested so go with it=]

Are you responding? Some people just like texting, I'm almost always texting with someone on my phone no matter what I'm doing. He might just not be good on the phone to call you, I know I'm not, I get disctracted really easily and lose my train of thought (or something like that....) so with texts its easier because I just say what I want.

so girls complain nowdays because guys are TRYING!!

What is this world comming to?

quote:Originally posted by LurkingLikeAHobbit:

complain

There is no complaint to the post.

ALWAYS HAS TO BE TALL...

my inferiority complex just rocketed skywards ...

p.s. though this gives me the right to be sexist and a pig and call youa b****..i refuse to, its not polite...plus meh

JUst relax, its normal and go for it, whats the worst that could happen?

ANd as a side note to all the 'psycho' answers. Studies have shown its normally the really nice, kind, friendly and polite people who turn psycho or turn into serial killers, not the stalkerish type. Im not saying the stalkerish type are never like that but in most cases they arent. Bascially if youre on a bus and you have someone who looks like a loon to sit nxt to or some reall ynice guy who helps all the old ladies on and off the bus, sit next to the lon, statistically youre safer. OH and if you have and problems with this idea, email my lecturer about them, hes one of the worlds leading experts on criminal psychopaths and serial killers.

quote:Originally posted by MJR deus:

ALWAYS HAS TO BE TALL...

my inferiority complex just rocketed skywards ...

p.s. though this gives me the right to be sexist and a pig and call youa b****..i refuse to, its not polite...plus meh

i said it was his best feature, not that it was necessary. i like tallness, yeah, but i do date guys who are 5'7'', 5'8'', etc. Never really dated a guy who was 5'6'' or below, though -- that's my height.

quote:Originally posted by XHippie HunterX:

If im taking a female on a romantic second date it is for one reason, and only one- I want to fuck her quick without all the dating bullshit that comes along with it.

Showering you with constant text messages is just his way of trying to get to know you/show you how much he likes you.



i don't really see how ice skating leads to fucking, but thanks.

i guess some of my fears are alleviated by the general consensus that he's merely showing normal interest. i'm still kind of worried that i'll mess it up.

euda: got your message, working on a paper right now, will talk later.



[This message has been edited by lauren7249 (edited 10-26-2006).]

How tall?

=)

quote:Originally posted by Andreas:

How tall?

=)

6'2''...yeah i know you're like 6'7'' or something...

quote:Originally posted by Euda:

There is no complaint to the post.

It was a satirical comment on the situation.

one more question. should i wear a skirt again? i wear skirts a lot.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

one more question. should i wear a skirt again? i wear skirts a lot.

If you will feel better in a skirt, then you should wear one. I don't think anybody here knows if you look better in a skirt than in pants.

Keep in mind that ice is cold.

Skirt? Yeah, I guess so, if you did before. Don't change your style too much.

it's amazing how much you guys help me.

I dont know how good you aer at iceskating, but if you fall on your ass, remember, dammit that shit is cold!

It's like icy icy concrete. So I dont know if you'd want your bare thighs on that.

Also if you flump down, that skirt may well end up over your head. Which whilst it probably wouldnt bother him, might well traumatise you a bit.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

I'm acting like a stereotypical, stressed out female, RAH RAH RAH!



Fixed

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

6'2''...yeah i know you're like 6'7'' or something...

You're not one of this picky broads with a cut-off point on height, are you? =P

quote:Originally posted by Andreas:

You're not one of this picky broads with a cut-off point on height, are you? =P

not really. i mean, above my height (5'6'') is kind of my cut off point i guess.

So, did you nail him? I must know.

quote:Originally posted by Andreas:

So, did you nail him? I must know.

haha no read my other thread. we haven't even kissed yet or anything.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

one more question. should i wear a skirt again? i wear skirts a lot.

They turn me on for some reason. I say go for it.

See this is the curse of being a guy.

You genuinely want to be a nice guy as in looking after them, treat them like regular human beings and show a sort of interest.

Showing interest is bad. They can't see you as the hot, sexy bad boy that treats them like a pile of shit, never calls then shows up whenever he wants to.

Listen Lauren, here's how it goes. He likes you and he wants to hang out with you more, doesn't see anything wrong with texting and texts you now and again, might even worry after an hour or three whenever you don't reply. Basically if you were to never respond again, he'd be annoyed because you didn't have the guts to tell him what he did wrong. If you told him you oughta stay friends, he'll be a bit dissapointed, possibly even slightly down and sort of shrug, be a sort of friend in the sense that he's not gonna call you all sorts of names or say to his friends that you're a whore, just that he'll be wholy dissapointed. But he's not gonna be fucked for life.. unless he fell for you hard.. which happens, but only if you'd encouraged it in which case you remind me of a girl I saw too much of.