A while back, before me and my girlfriend took a break, something happened. We were in bed, sleeping together. She was already asleep, and me being an insomniac was just laying there. Wide awake. So I go hug her from behind, then she like...shakes me off and makes a frustrated sound.

So I'm a tad offended, but what ever. I roll over, face away from her and try and go to sleep. Then she comes over to me, and starts hugging me from behind. Sweet. So then I roll over and hug her back. And she moves away from me again. I roll over again, she comes back to me. I roll back, she rolls away. Rinse and repeat.

Any way, so I get sick of the fucking headcase madness. So I go off into the bar-room, drink like 4 beers, and take 80mg Temazepam. I'm nicely, and royally fucked at this point. I'm thinking I'll easily get to sleep now.

Any way, at this point, she'd still never made me come. Then, when I got back to bed, she thought I'd just left to the bathroom or something. So she decides she's keen. We get into it, and just, wow. Longest session ever. I came like a waterhose, like that dude, Peter North, many, many times, as did she. It was amazing (I guess my orgasm problem was anxiety).

Thing is, she never knew I was absolutly, and utterly fucked off my face. I only remember things vaguely (benzos + alcohol = thewtf?)

I've never lied to her, or kept anything. This is making me feel guilty. A girl has already said it's no big deal. What do you guys think?

Would you be pissed off if your partner had sex with you while totally fucked up? Or that it was the first time you made them come?

[This message has been edited by arquin (edited 10-21-2006).]

She was half asleep, but awakened when you came back. She probably sensed your absence.

I don't think it's anything to concern yourself with. In the end it was good, no?

The only time me and my boyfriend ever had half decent sex was when I was completely fucked on weed, diazepam and a few drinks. And it still wasn't even that good... seriously, I think I'm gonna break up with him today...

Well if I was her I probably wouldn't want to hear it, but it doesn't need to be said, and you def. shouldn't feel guilty. You should just be happy that you've finally found a way to make it good.

quote:Originally posted by Demoiselle:

The only time me and my boyfriend ever had half decent sex was when I was completely fucked on weed, diazepam and a few drinks. And it still wasn't even that good... seriously, I think I'm gonna break up with him today...

Sex is important. Important enough to break up with some one if it's terrible. But I hope you gave him a few chances to work on it. Seriously, no pressured experimentation does wonders. But so does absolute stress.

Multiple times, my relationship hung on the outcome of our next fuck. She's a very "if it's not good, I'm only giving it one chance", which forced me to fuck like a god-damn stallion.

Does he try his hardest to satisfy you?

quote:Originally posted by stab:

Well if I was her I probably wouldn't want to hear it, but it doesn't need to be said, and you def. shouldn't feel guilty. You should just be happy that you've finally found a way to make it good.

I have a slight supsision that she knows, but likes to turn a blind eye. Memory loss + falling asleep (while being severe insomniac) + going cross eyes. I don't know how she couldn't have figured it out.

^ *shrug* Well if she hasn't said or let onto anything negative, there isn't a problem, is there! Unless it really does play on your mind, and we don't settle it for you (as a whole), then you'll probably have to talk to her about it for your own good. But that would suck too.

I just think it's not really an issue. You had great sex with your girlfriend on drugs, simple as that, nothing more. *genie head movement, dissapears*

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

Sex is important. Important enough to break up with some one if it's terrible. But I hope you gave him a few chances to work on it. Seriously, no pressured experimentation does wonders. But so does absolute stress.

Multiple times, my relationship hung on the outcome of our next fuck. She's a very "if it's not good, I'm only giving it one chance", which forced me to fuck like a god-damn stallion.

Does he try his hardest to satisfy you?



He's gotten many, many chances. And he does try. But it's just not working anymore. A few days ago, I couldn't even get turned on at all. He was working away, and I was sitting there like "k when is this going to end?" I feel pretty bad about that, actually. But I'm getting terribly bored with this relationship, and we have these mini-fights pretty much every day now, and a big fight about once a week. It's annoying. Soo... yeah. No good.

All the words are turning green, so I can't read others replys, but hey, I wouldn't feel bad.

quote:Originally posted by Demoiselle:

He's gotten many, many chances. And he does try. But it's just not working anymore. A few days ago, I couldn't even get turned on at all. He was working away, and I was sitting there like "k when is this going to end?" I feel pretty bad about that, actually. But I'm getting terribly bored with this relationship, and we have these mini-fights pretty much every day now, and a big fight about once a week. It's annoying. Soo... yeah. No good.



Mmmm, you and him sound very familiar to me and her.

The whole 'not geting turned on' thing. We had that before the break. "Uhh, sorry, my body just isn't reacting well to me today" (when she wasnt getting wet). Yeah, more like it wasn't reacting well to ME.

Now, she leaves big wet spots on my bed. It's like oh...my...god..."did you piss the bed?".

The mini fights, and big ones, again, sounding VERY similar.

Is he the bitch in the relationship?

quote:Originally posted by Black Territory:

All the words are turning green, so I can't read others replys, but hey, I wouldn't feel bad.

Acid does beautiful things .

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

Mmmm, you and him sound very familiar to me and her.

The whole 'not geting turned on' thing. We had that before the break. "Uhh, sorry, my body just isn't reacting well to me today" (when she wasnt getting wet). Yeah, more like it wasn't reacting well to ME.

Now, she leaves big wet spots on my bed. It's like oh...my...god..."did you piss the bed?".

The mini fights, and big ones, again, sounding VERY similar.

Is he the bitch in the relationship?



Heh, yeah, he kinda is the bitch, though he'd never admit it. If it was anyone else, I would have ended the relationship like a million times by now. But besides the bad sex and the fighting (and I know other people fight WAY more than we do) he's perfect boyfriend. So I'm being pathetic and hoping it'll get better.



[This message has been edited by Demoiselle (edited 10-21-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Demoiselle:

Heh, yeah, he kinda is the bitch, though he'd never admit it. If it was anyone else, I would have ended the relationship like a million times by now. But besides the bad sex and the fighting (and I know other people fight WAY more than we do) he's perfect boyfriend. So I'm being pathetic and hoping it'll get better.

Haha, wow, the more you say, the more I can relate.

Maybe take a break. Don't lie to him as to why. Tell him it;s not working and that the break might be temporary, or permanent.

But atleast leave it open for discussion.

What you'll come to realise is that a lot of other guys will be better in bed, and make you more attracted to them, but you just wont be able to trust them. You'll feel that they're dodgy. Then you'll probably end up going back to him because he's reliable, and you can count on him.

Or you'll begin to appreciate him as a whole.

It can go either way, and...since you've given it enough chances, it's worth a shot. Even though you think you want to break up with him, you sound like you still want him around. Very conflicting emotions.

Sorry if I've made wrong judgements, but yeah...let me know if I have.

Damn, that was dead on. Thing is, I already know that pretty much no other guy can compete with him. So what if I'm having good sex? I'll be sitting around convinced that I'm being cheated on, lied to, manipulated, because that's how most guys are. And yeah, I definitely don't want to lose him. Blah. Now I'm depressed at work. At least there's noone else here.

quote:Originally posted by Demoiselle:

Damn, that was dead on. Thing is, I already know that pretty much no other guy can compete with him. So what if I'm having good sex? I'll be sitting around convinced that I'm being cheated on, lied to, manipulated, because that's how most guys are. And yeah, I definitely don't want to lose him. Blah. Now I'm depressed at work. At least there's noone else here.

So work on the sex. Don't just give him chances, give him advice! Like if he's doing a shitty job fingering you, grab his hand and do it with him. Getting tired of a position? Push him off you and change. Not hitting the right spots? Tell him how.

I wasn't always a good lover. I sucked balls in the beginning. Fuck, I couldn't even get it in! This guy sounds like me, and all it took me to please her was some guidance. After that, I figured out the rest.

And lastly, atleast you're one of the girls who appreciate loyalty and trustworthiness.

Don't be sad. If it ends, it was meant to. You can say you honestly tried. But if shit works out, it will be awesome.

I've done that. It improved things, but not much. Maybe my expectations are too high... meh, who knows. Sex is overrated.

quote:Originally posted by Demoiselle:

I've done that. It improved things, but not much. Maybe my expectations are too high... meh, who knows. Sex is overrated.

...maybe it's your libido that is the problem?

I've hadd 40-41 degree fevers (104-106) and still wanted sex. It's like...if there was a 1/1000 chance that having sex could kill you, I'm sure people would constantly still be having sex!

Meh, you know your situation best, I'm sure you'll make the right decision.

One thing though, if he's anything like me, if you end it with him, he'll still be loyal/faithful to you for a while. That doesn't benefit him in any way. If you truly care for him, hurt him a lot, and try and push him away into the arms of another woman.

No, my libido is definitely not a problem. My inability to orgasm/my loss of interest after foreplay? Probably a problem.

^^^It sounds like you're just not attracted to him.

And arquin...Why the hell are you even THINKING about that?? It happened a while ago and it's not that big a deal anyway. Why do people worry about stuff like this?

He's bringing me chicken soup at work. <3 I retract all my previous break-up ponderances. Noone else is going to bring me soup at work.

And Xiao, arquin is worrying because he's smitten. YOUNG and smitten. We're not smart enough not to dwell on things yet.

quote:Originally posted by Demoiselle:

No, my libido is definitely not a problem. My inability to orgasm/my loss of interest after foreplay? Probably a problem.

So, you're blaming your sexual problems on him why?

Arquin, in a rabbitweed-type relationship, i would just be like (post sex) "woah, I'm pretty wasted, but that was sweet") I dunno how it works for you. I think with the thing you've got going on, it's best to just say nothing.

Dont know, dont tell?

or something like that.

If you think it's going to offend her or piss her off if you tell her, why bother telling her?

It's not lying, it's withholding the truth.

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

A while back, before me and my girlfriend took a break, something happened. We were in bed, sleeping together. She was already asleep, and me being an insomniac was just laying there. Wide awake. So I go hug her from behind, then she like...shakes me off and makes a frustrated sound.

So I'm a tad offended, but what ever. I roll over, face away from her and try and go to sleep. Then she comes over to me, and starts hugging me from behind. Sweet. So then I roll over and hug her back. And she moves away from me again. I roll over again, she comes back to me. I roll back, she rolls away. Rinse and repeat.

Any way, so I get sick of the fucking headcase madness. So I go off into the bar-room, drink like 4 beers, and take 80mg Temazepam. I'm nicely, and royally fucked at this point. I'm thinking I'll easily get to sleep now.

Any way, at this point, she'd still never made me come. Then, when I got back to bed, she thought I'd just left to the bathroom or something. So she decides she's keen. We get into it, and just, wow. Longest session ever. I came like a waterhose, like that dude, Peter North, many, many times, as did she. It was amazing (I guess my orgasm problem was anxiety).

Thing is, she never knew I was absolutly, and utterly fucked off my face. I only remember things vaguely (benzos + alcohol = thewtf?)

I've never lied to her, or kept anything. This is making me feel guilty. A girl has already said it's no big deal. What do you guys think?

Would you be pissed off if your partner had sex with you while totally fucked up? Or that it was the first time you made them come?



first off, drugs/alcohol make sex feel even better than it normally does. Sure, sometimes just straight sex with nothing influencing your body is nice, but other times, it's nice to be OFF YOUR FUCKING HEAD!!

Second. Women are weird in bed, sleeping wise. i can't recall that many occasions my ex and i had sleeping in the same bed where we both woke up feeling refreshed. They did exist, definately, they just weren't by any means often.

Then again, we're (you and I) very similar in lots of ways.. I'm also an insomniac and i also love to get absolutely smashed off copious amounts of booze and hopefully some prescrition/non-prescription drugs so...

[This message has been edited by Garfunkel (edited 10-22-2006).]

I don't really understand what the problem is...arquin, did your girl say anything?

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

I don't really understand what the problem is...arquin, did your girl say anything?

I'm extreemly honest.

I consider this to be dishonest.

It makes me feel guilty.

Guilt is a problem.

It's why I'm asking how much this would piss other people off.

Oh, I see. It wouldn't really bother me, I don't think. I mean, she must know that you abuse substances. And if you "confess" to her that you were messed up, then it makes it seem like you did something wrong, but I don't think you did...But if it'll make you feel better, then maybe you should. I'm sorry, I'm pretty high, I don't know if this makes sense...

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

Oh, I see. It wouldn't really bother me, I don't think. I mean, she must know that you abuse substances. And if you "confess" to her that you were messed up, then it makes it seem like you did something wrong, but I don't think you did...But if it'll make you feel better, then maybe you should. I'm sorry, I'm pretty high, I don't know if this makes sense...

You made sense. Good point, confessing makes it seem like I did something wrong.

Maybe I didn't. Because me and being under the influince come hand in hand.

Danke!

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

You made sense. Good point, confessing makes it seem like I did something wrong.

Maybe I didn't. Because me and being under the influince come hand in hand.

Danke!

being under the influence is fucking great.

sorry. not a constructive post. Just thought the whole forum should know that i making an absolute MESS of yourself is about the best fun a boy/girl can have without taking his/her clothes off.... but it gets even more fun if clothes are removed.

quote:Originally posted by Demoiselle:

He's bringing me chicken soup at work. <3 I retract all my previous break-up ponderances. Noone else is going to bring me soup at work.

And Xiao, arquin is worrying because he's smitten. YOUNG and smitten. We're not smart enough not to dwell on things yet.

Hey I dwell on stuff too...I just don't get why he's dwelling on something so innocuous.