Alrighty then, School starts, what not. (Woo, Sophomore year..Oh giddy joy!). And in one of my classes, there is Senior girl. She in my opinion is amazing looking. I won't go into detail as thats not really the more pressing matter.

So, I start picking up on vibes that shes flirting. You know talking to me, smiling, looking into my eyes, randomly resting her head on my shoulder, touching my arm/me in general while talking. Enough for me to notice.

Now I'm a kind of shy guy, so it took me a while to realize... "Oh shit! She may like you dude!" In return, I start being more nice, blah blah blah .

What makes this the awkward situation is the fact that she randomly fluctuates day by day. From like... super flirt to really nice and normal. Which is making me even more fucking confused. I know nothing about her essentially, except her name and that she is a senior. Does she like me? Is she taken? The questions are overflowing.

So, S&A, my rarely ventured forum, care to help a boy out? I honestly can't get my mind off of her. The fluctuating is driving me nuts. It seems like she wants me to respond more. and when I do, it yields positive results.

If you think she likes me.. what should I go about doing? I was thinking about asking if she has a AIM s/n, but that'd be kind of random in my opinion. If that fails, phone # which is even more hard for a shy guy like me.

If you need me to elaborate more on anything, feel free to say so. Im kind of rushed typing this.

[This message has been edited by Dodectabone (edited 10-21-2006).]

Recon, recon, recon

Find out more about her, secretly for some things, and definitely find out more about how she acts around other people.

Preferably you should ask seniors that you know if she has a reputation as a flirt, slut, if she has a boyfriend, etc.

But in all honesty, if she really is hot, there is very little chance she is interested in a relationship with a sohphomore.

Although the only definite thing you can do is grow some balls and ask for her phone number.

Asking her for AIM or MSN or something like that would probably be better though, since that is usually considered far less "invasive" than asking for a phone number, you should have a better chance of acceptance and less nervousness.

quote:Originally posted by Byss:

Recon, recon, recon

Find out more about her, secretly for some things, and definitely find out more about how she acts around other people.

Preferably you should ask seniors that you know if she has a reputation as a flirt, slut, if she has a boyfriend, etc.

But in all honesty, if she really is hot, there is very little chance she is interested in a relationship with a sohphomore.

Although the only definite thing you can do is grow some balls and ask for her phone number.

Asking her for AIM or MSN or something like that would probably be better though, since that is usually considered far less "invasive" than asking for a phone number, you should have a better chance of acceptance and less nervousness.

Might I add some more complications to the matter? Its a semester class.

Alas, you also mentioned how I find her attractive. She is average in looks, but its not just the looks that pull things off its her upbeat kick ass personality. We also share alot of tastes too. (music, movies, etc.)

EDIT: And I hardly know any seniors that im close enough to ask random shit like that too. Ill see what I can do.

[This message has been edited by Dodectabone (edited 10-21-2006).]

Don't be fucking retarded by asking for an SN. Get a phone # so you appear normal and not like a computer nerd. SN comes later after you've talked on the phone once or twice.

edit: you said you're shy about getting #s or whatever. Just ask her for it. Seriously, no lines, no gimmicks, no beating around the bush. Just tell her you'd like to call her and straight out ask her for her #. Girls love that, and she won't say no. I've never had a girl turn me down if I asked her for her # directly like that.

[This message has been edited by Fanglekai (edited 10-21-2006).]

^ Exactly! Thats the best approach there is. I was kinda of like you up to the last winter, then i said "fuck it, its not worth it" and now im alot more open/friendly for other people.

Youre in a good situation because she is making the first moves. Act open towards her, but dont be too fast, like asking her out to a restaurant tomorrow or in an hour. First befriend her, talk to her, if she teases you by resting her head on your shoulder then put an arm around her, comfort her. If she doesnt just run away after that, then it means she accepts you and its good. And be open with her abou such things... But take this and any other advice carefully, since all girls are different and my/our knowledge might not be good for your relationship.

Good luck dude, good luck.

edit: Funny thing. Both me an Byss have problems in this area, Byss with a GF, and I havent had a real deal GF... ever, although got close a couple of times. Not because of some sort of deformation/shyness but because I was just dumb and didnt know about these things so not only did I fuck it all up, I also managed to make myself both a dick and tard, but a very smart dick and tard. And I learned... and I chilled out... and now I have many friends that dont think Im a dick or tard, but I dont let them peoples too near, peoples are dangerous and remember, it will always be you>them. And yeah, there are many fish in the sea my boy so dont despair.

[This message has been edited by LiquidIce (edited 10-21-2006).]

Byss is on point with you needing to find out more about her. use whatever resources you have to gather information. throw her name into a myspace page search.. if you could get ahold of her myspace that would be a straight up gem.. you'll know everything you need to.

if you are gonna try and get her screenname you need to work up a convo with her relating to the subject of being online. jus make some shit up so you can bring it up, an example would be like:

"so I finally got my internet working again after it being broke for a few weeks"

"oh really? sweet"

"yea, it's nice jus to be able to get back on the net, log online again and stuff.."

"yeah I spend alot of times in the evening online."

"oh for real?? you use AIM?"

"yeah"

"me too.. let's exchange screennames"

see how easy that was?? that's how you gotta play it off. it's gotta be casual. let me also tell you though it's very important that you INSTRUCT this female to give her your SN, never ASK, always INSTRUCT...

once you get her screenname and work some game online you can try and hollar at her for her number.. once again.. CASUAL.. something like.. "hey, give me your number so I can hit you up sometime" will work. once you get these 2 things you have your foot in the door.

I also remember reading that since she's been giving you attention you have "started being more nice".. that's not the approach you wanna take.. I say this because even though she's sending you positive vibes with the body language, touching and shit.. if you REALLY wanna take it to the next level with this female it's gonna take for you to be bold and very confident in your approach. especially since she's older than you.. it's not hard to lean back and play the "nice" guy, but if you really want this shit to turn into something more your game is gonna have to be crisp and on deck 100%.

now get to work' and hit us back with an update homey.

^ Tried searching myspace, no dice. Kind of disappointing, since that little corny page would make the 'recon' all the fuckin' easier.

And GREAT idea with the conversation. Ill most definatly do it.

Also to the people that say 'WTF? Computer nerd! Don't ask for s/n!' Online allows me to see things. Perhaps she has "I <3 Jason my BF" in her profile. While that seems unlikely, it could happen. I would only ask for a phone number if I had a sure chance.

If you don't believe you have a sure chance, you shouldn't be hitting on her at all.

quote:Originally posted by Dodectabone:

^ Tried searching myspace, no dice. Kind of disappointing, since that little corny page would make the 'recon' all the fuckin' easier.

And GREAT idea with the conversation. Ill most definatly do it.

Also to the people that say 'WTF? Computer nerd! Don't ask for s/n!' Online allows me to see things. Perhaps she has "I <3 Jason my BF" in her profile. While that seems unlikely, it could happen. I would only ask for a phone number if I had a sure chance.

i talk to one person i know in real life online. talking online is totally retarded unless it's with someone that would be inconvenient to talk to otherwise.

plus, if she's actually into you, she sure as hell won't want to sit around and IM you emoticons, get that bitch's number!

quote:Originally posted by Dodectabone:

^ Tried searching myspace, no dice. Kind of disappointing, since that little corny page would make the 'recon' all the fuckin' easier.

And GREAT idea with the conversation. Ill most definatly do it.

Also to the people that say 'WTF? Computer nerd! Don't ask for s/n!' Online allows me to see things. Perhaps she has "I <3 Jason my BF" in her profile. While that seems unlikely, it could happen. I would only ask for a phone number if I had a sure chance.

Read this post of yours, and you'll find out why you won't get her. You aren't confident enough to ask her if she's seeing anyone. Next time you see her, just work it into a conversation. Ask her what she does on weekends, if she goes out with friends or is seeing anyone. It's really a lot better than trying to look her up on myspace. Christ, it's not that hard to do!! Just DO IT instead of thinking about it. If she's dating someone, who cares, she's flirting with you. Flirt back. Don't be nice, just be a confident, fun person to be around, and people will always enjoy your company. Don't bend over backwards for her. Don't take bullshit from her, tease her back. I've dated a lot of girls, and gotten with a lot of girls, and I'm not giving you stupid "I read this online" information. This is firsthand how you get a girl info, buddy. Be confident and be direct. Seriously why drag something out that you can do in like 3 seconds?

Here is your assignment, what you'll do next time you see her, if you want her.

If she's in a good mood and being flirty, flirt back. Ask her about her interests, what she does on the weekend. Ask if she's seeing anyone. Be nonchalant no matter the response. If she's single, ask her if she'd like to do something on the weekend *insert common interest here*. If you have an interest like you enjoy walking at night or something tell her you'd like to go for a walk in the evening and just get to know her. This'll show you aren't a total douchebag just trying to nail her, and you'll get the benefit of (HOLY SHIT!!) getting to know her!! If she says she'd like that, then say cool, let's exchange #s so we can set it up. Now you have her #, and a plan for a date. Seriously you can't screw this up unless you act way too nice or if you lack confidence. If you do in fact follow this and she's single and interested, you will get her # and a date. If you do get that date, don't reveal everything about yourself to her, but show her you're interesting. Ask her some questions, respond with something about you, use her answers to make more questions, and don't be afraid of silence. Then tell her how you hate awkward silences, but with her they don't feel that way. She'll feel more comfortable around you. Ok? Just go on a limb and trust me, and at the LEAST you'll gain some really good experience. Don't be shy. I was shy like you and it got me nowhere. Be confident, and you will succeed.

quote:Originally posted by Fanglekai:

Read this post of yours, and you'll find out why you won't get her. You aren't confident enough to ask her if she's seeing anyone. Next time you see her, just work it into a conversation. Ask her what she does on weekends, if she goes out with friends or is seeing anyone. It's really a lot better than trying to look her up on myspace. Christ, it's not that hard to do!! Just DO IT instead of thinking about it. If she's dating someone, who cares, she's flirting with you. Flirt back. Don't be nice, just be a confident, fun person to be around, and people will always enjoy your company. Don't bend over backwards for her. Don't take bullshit from her, tease her back. I've dated a lot of girls, and gotten with a lot of girls, and I'm not giving you stupid "I read this online" information. This is firsthand how you get a girl info, buddy. Be confident and be direct. Seriously why drag something out that you can do in like 3 seconds?

Here is your assignment, what you'll do next time you see her, if you want her.

If she's in a good mood and being flirty, flirt back. Ask her about her interests, what she does on the weekend. Ask if she's seeing anyone. Be nonchalant no matter the response. If she's single, ask her if she'd like to do something on the weekend *insert common interest here*. If you have an interest like you enjoy walking at night or something tell her you'd like to go for a walk in the evening and just get to know her. This'll show you aren't a total douchebag just trying to nail her, and you'll get the benefit of (HOLY SHIT!!) getting to know her!! If she says she'd like that, then say cool, let's exchange #s so we can set it up. Now you have her #, and a plan for a date. Seriously you can't screw this up unless you act way too nice or if you lack confidence. If you do in fact follow this and she's single and interested, you will get her # and a date. If you do get that date, don't reveal everything about yourself to her, but show her you're interesting. Ask her some questions, respond with something about you, use her answers to make more questions, and don't be afraid of silence. Then tell her how you hate awkward silences, but with her they don't feel that way. She'll feel more comfortable around you. Ok? Just go on a limb and trust me, and at the LEAST you'll gain some really good experience. Don't be shy. I was shy like you and it got me nowhere. Be confident, and you will succeed.

You've got to keep in mind I only see her 56 minutes a day. She isn't in any of my other classes, or lunch period. Thus making this difficult. I mean, I know sure as hell where you're coming from. but bringing up a random conversation like that while in a class is difficult if you get what I mean. Its not like at lunch or outside of classes where idle chitchat makes sense.

quote:Originally posted by Dodectabone:

You've got to keep in mind I only see her 56 minutes a day. She isn't in any of my other classes, or lunch period. Thus making this difficult. I mean, I know sure as hell where you're coming from. but bringing up a random conversation like that while in a class is difficult if you get what I mean. Its not like at lunch or outside of classes where idle chitchat makes sense.

Ok, well hopefully she'll be in a good mood soon, and then after flirting a little tell her you think she's pretty cool and you'd like to get to know her more. If she says how so then say you'd like to know her interests or what she does on weekends, ask her if maybe she'd like to talk a while during school in between classes or after school sometime. That's honest, and I dont know why she'd turn you down. Act like it's no big deal, because it's not a big deal. If she works or whatever after school or if she says she can't in between classes then say well how about some evening or weekend we get together to *walk, talk, ice cream, coffee, something light and fun and not pressuring.* Do that, then follow my previous advice. You've got limited time to work with, but the point is to get to know her outside of school, because people act differently in that social setting. If she's keen to hang with you, then you've got a great chance. If not, give up wanting her.

Whatever you do, my whole point is that you just need to treat her like a person, get to know her as best you can, and then decide if she's someone you want to be with. While you're doing that, tease her and have fun, flirt a little. Don't compliment her. Just get to know her as a person. It's not about pussy, it's about getting to know someone as a person. That's the best lesson you can learn early on.