Okay, so you knew some one had bipolar before you decided to get involved with them, would you be understanding? Like, for every up, there's a down.

For all the times I'm happy and bubbly, and awesome to be around, there are equal amounts of "I want to put a bullet in my head" times.

Would you just tell them to "suck it up" and "stop being a sook"? or would you try and help them out?

Lastly, this is kind of a side question for the regulars and the smarties:

If my relationship is fucking fantastic when I'm on my meds. But falls to shit the instant I'm off them, wouldn't you feel like the whole relationship is fake? That they've fallen for some one you're not?

[This message has been edited by arquin (edited 10-18-2006).]

I'd try to be understanding, because telling somebody to suck it up when they honestly can't help it isn't going to do anything for them. It is hard though, to be around somebody who has mood swings, and not be able to do anything about it.

As for the last part... No, it wouldn't be fake. I'm not a big fan of medication, but they're not exactly mind-altering... at least, they don't alter your perception of reality, so it's still *you* and not the meds talking.

quote:Originally posted by firekitty751:

As for the last part... No, it wouldn't be fake. I'm not a big fan of medication, but they're not exactly mind-altering... at least, they don't alter your perception of reality, so it's still *you* and not the meds talking.

They alter me to an extent you couldn't believe.

Hmmm, also, I kind of can help it. It's happening because of me not buying my meds.

My ex was bi-polar, among other things, and know ahead of time would have been nice, but it wouldnt have changed anything. No matter how hard you try you aren't going to be able to solve that person's problem.

And as for the second part, the medications even out the chemical imbalances. They make you who you should be without the imbalance. How is that fake? Its not like it's making you some drugged up nutcase that looks like a model of the stepford wives.

*Edit: Go buy your meds you jackass. Its not fair for you to put other people through hell simply because you dont want to take your meds.

[This message has been edited by XHippie HunterX (edited 10-18-2006).]

Being a shallow cunt, I'd have to say I wouldnt bother with you. I've had enough drama for one life, and I wouldnt want to be mother figure to yet another guy and end up chasing him round with his meds.



You're on your meds for a reason! Dont stop taking them when you think you're feeling better because that can get really,really bad.

quote:Originally posted by yoyobek:

Being a shallow cunt, I'd have to say I wouldnt bother with you.

That's not shallow. You're making a decision based on my personallity. There's no better thing to base it on.

Shallow would be not bothering with me because I'm ugly.

*edit*

Fuck this is terrible. Normally I don't care what she does. She can sleep at guys houses, in their beds, what ever. So long as no touching.

Now all she has to do is write "xoxo" to a guy and I'm all like "WTF? IS THERE SOME ONE ELSE?"

No wonder things fall to shit, honestly, who the FUCK would want to deal with that...

[This message has been edited by arquin (edited 10-18-2006).]

arquin, what I meant is they're not altering your perception of reality. It's not like you're constantly high or anything.

Go back on your meds if you don't like being off them. It's not fake, it's a choice you make, a sacrifice, to keep yourself and your SO happy.

And that, really, is the most real thing of all.

Find a parter who is also bi-polar, and who's mood cycles synch up with your's.

Well I'm not bipolar, but I know a little something about medication. I was on some HORRIBLE medication for 3 months over the summer. It helped me some, but the side affects were awful so I stopped taking it. I can't feel anything when I'm on it, it's like I'm already dead and seeing the world through layers of fog or smoke. After I quit taking it...WOW. I did suddenly experience an extreme upswing in my anxiety and my sex drive went through the roof, I mean it was like a compultion that I had to have sex as much as possible. My symptoms have gotten worse again...But I think I can handle it. I have good times and bad times, you know?

And I agree...The person the pills creates isn't really me.

And my husband is pretty understanding...But he bugs me a lot to get back on the pills and sometimes he yells at me and says I'm being "crazy."

[This message has been edited by Xiao Mei (edited 10-18-2006).]

if someone is telling you to 'get over it' when its an established medical condition then they really don't know much about it at all. bipolar disorder is not having a cry about loosing your drink at the pub, its a real disease.



ive had a similar kind of deal in terms of knowing reality when on medication. one way to look at it is as two people. who would you like to be? if being on the meds allows you to take control, and be who you want to be, doesn't it follow that things will work out the way you want.

i am not sure if you go into a depression when off meds, or what though. but what i do know is that while you are not happy with yourself, you will destroy things you care about.

reading replies, get back on the medication. they do fuck with your personality, but i guess who would you rather be? i think the mistake many people make is how they would rather feel, but feelings do not translate into happiness or even living.

quote:Originally posted by arquin:



Now all she has to do is write "xoxo" to a guy and I'm all like "WTF? IS THERE SOME ONE ELSE?"

No wonder things fall to shit, honestly, who the FUCK would want to deal with that...



I'd deal with that.



A guy who cares for and about his girlfriend is better than one who goes "meh, do whatever. whoever. *shrugs*"



I allways thought that was pretty normal. Well, in normal guys, anyway-to be slightly jealous and protective of the girl they're dating?

hey arquin.

do you like the way you are when you're on your meds, or do you prefer the person you are when you're off them? it's not a trick question. if you prefer the person you are when you're on them, that's you, and there's nothing fake about it. but if you're yearning for your bipolar highs and lows, or bored with your mellow stability, it's not you. a person's essence is so much more than their behavior or their natural brain chemicals. it's their consciousness, and where their consciousness prefers and chooses to dwell.

i've tried a shitload of meds to help me. prozac and cymbalta calmed me down. the seritonin made me not care and not get angry or upset. i didn't like it, though! i felt flattened. i had no artistic inspiration, and though i was happy, i felt listless. i much prefer the effects of wellbutrin, which allows me to have bad moods, creativity, and highs and lows. it does help me, though, by giving me more motivation and energy. since i like how i feel, i believe the way i am on this medication is a true reflection of who i am. it's that simple.

as for your first question, i can't generalize. some guys who are bipolar would be worth it, others wouldn't be.

At times, it can be very testing, but I remember the fact that I knew she was like that when I came into the relationship, and that it isn't her fault. I'm understanding, and I care. Rather than complaining about it, I do my best to help her and comfort her.

As long as you really are understanding, it isn't too much of a problem.

quote:Originally posted by arquin:

That's not shallow. You're making a decision based on my personallity. There's no better thing to base it on.

Shallow would be not bothering with me because I'm ugly.

*edit*

Fuck this is terrible. Normally I don't care what she does. She can sleep at guys houses, in their beds, what ever. So long as no touching.

Now all she has to do is write "xoxo" to a guy and I'm all like "WTF? IS THERE SOME ONE ELSE?"

No wonder things fall to shit, honestly, who the FUCK would want to deal with that...



Uhh... you should probably deal with the fact that she's "sleeping" with other guys and writing "xoxo" before your jealousy (and well deserved, btw) and your bi-polarness fuse together and make you go completely off the deep end. Again.

I thought you said she'd turned into super loyal girlfriend lady. That doesn't sound like the super loyal type...

Marty my good man, I want come into this whole thing from a different angle. I dunno if it will offend you or whatever, but sometimes what you hate hearing can help.

Anyway, so you're bipolar. I don't think you're making it up or anything like that. What I'm saying is, compensate for your mentalness. I think you sometimes have the attitude where it's like "oh, it's ok to do this, I'm bipolar". Or "I'm clinically insane, people should expect this from me".

What I'm saying is, rather than focus on meds, just focus on reacting better to fucked up moods. Bipolar or not, I think there are some parts of your life that you over attribute to bipolar that are simply bad decisions.

Don't mean to lecture you or anything dude, just some food for thought. Peace.

quote:Originally posted by yoyobek:

I've had enough drama for one life.

there's always going to be more drama.

Yeah.. my boyfriend of a long time is very bipolar manic. He just recently went on medication for it, and i don't know which I prefer. He's kind of emotionless when he's on it.. but when he's off it, he's kind of freaking out.. meh.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

hey arquin.

do you like the way you are when you're on your meds, or do you prefer the person you are when you're off them?

On them. Deffinatly.

Feeling terrific some of the time doesn't compensate for wanting to put a bullet in my head.

Also, please look into Mirtazapine. It's an antidepressent. Often prescribed for severe depression. It's a life saver. It could greatly benefit you.

quote:Originally posted by Demoiselle:

I thought you said she'd turned into super loyal girlfriend lady. That doesn't sound like the super loyal type...



I used to. It's past tense. If she did that now I'd be like "Oh my fucking god, what the fucking fuck?" I was non-caring. I got to a point where I was like "Meh, kiss people, I dont care" now if she writes "xoxo" I get pissed off. And xoxo is nothing to care about. It's two letter x's and two o's. The fact that I care is pathetic.

She is loyal. Too loyal. *skeezy look* She's deffinatly plotting something.

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:

Marty my good man, I want come into this whole thing from a different angle. I dunno if it will offend you or whatever, but sometimes what you hate hearing can help.

Anyway, so you're bipolar. I don't think you're making it up or anything like that. What I'm saying is, compensate for your mentalness. I think you sometimes have the attitude where it's like "oh, it's ok to do this, I'm bipolar". Or "I'm clinically insane, people should expect this from me".

What I'm saying is, rather than focus on meds, just focus on reacting better to fucked up moods. Bipolar or not, I think there are some parts of your life that you over attribute to bipolar that are simply bad decisions.

Don't mean to lecture you or anything dude, just some food for thought. Peace.

You're right. I do blame things on it sometimes.

Why are you not buying your meds? This is the question that stands out.

Where is the money going instead?

thank you for the med suggestion. i'm actually happy with my current one.

if you like your meds you should be on them. there's no reason not to be. unless there's something you're not telling us...

Sigh. I was going to make a topic like this regarding my problems with depression. I think it's okay as long as your partner is understanding...But I find that alot of people aren't understanding at all when it comes to mental illness. Hell, I even have prejudices against shit like depression. It took months for my doctor/family to comvince me to go on medication. And then I struggle with the "what is real?" question too. Like, what if my boyfriend doesn't love me when I'm off my meds? Should I even go off them at all? For the rest of my life? How depressing...