Ok, so I'm listening to my roommates telephone conversation with his girlfriend. Right now. Hope he doesn't start reading over my shoulder. It's not like I can NOT listen. It's the only noise.

Anyways, pretty much everything he's saying is a sort of joke or smoothed out, emotionalized idea. Every once in a while though, they start having these minor little confrontations, and he tries to defend himself with things like "how can ... possibly...if...etc." and "no, really, it's not my fault...". He tries to laugh while he says this, but it's not a laugh; it's the most terrifying noise I've ever heard. It's like he's trying to project confidence and power, yet this intense fear seems to override that. It's hard to distinguish what seems to be intended as a laugh from a sob.

I don't pretend to really understand it, but this really creeps me out. Something about the whole thing; how everything is said...

I don't know. I just get a sense that there's something deeply wrong with that kind of thing.

Most male-female conversations in general too; they're so... constructed. Filtered. Somehow fundamentally disgusting.

Yeah, I have been married 1.5 years and I still can't roll of the right words sometimes. Only because you don't know what the reaction will be. It's a lottery. You win some, you lost most

I know exactly what you mean. It's rarely natural; usually, everyone is so afraid of messing up or not being liked or being cool and awesome etc. that the conversation becomes meaningless. Just fear and effort and lies.

That's why not everyone is in immature relationships where you have to pretend and be afraid and other bullshit.

A truly compatible relationship built around mutual respect and equality never has that kind of bullshit, but then again, how many of those do we find, even among spouses?

But the mark of a good relationship is not seen when you are talking to eachother, but rather when you are able to shut the fuck up every once in a while and just appreciate each other's company in silence(adapted from Pulp Fiction)

You just have to find the right woman.

But.... even then there's a degree of tension. It's all part of maintaining a functioning relationship.