There's this really nice girl in one of my classes I've had my eye on for a while but never really made a move on. None of my mates really knew her or had anything in common with her, so really there was no competition with them for her, but I didn't really do anything.

Then last week when I was just starting to get proper feelings for her there was a party we all went to and she was there, she was sober throughout it but generally my friend did a much better job of getting to know her than me, and since then they've been talking a lot.

My conversations with her are usually pretty bland and shite, having a proper decent talk is like getting blood from a stone. On the other hand my mate has been talking to her continuously for 5 hours today (MSN).

So basically it's really not looking all that great a situation. I don't want to be an asshole and start competing with him for her, and she certainly seems more interested in him anyway. What should I do? Is it time to just give it up? I really don't want to.

Give up, don't fuck him over.

quote:Originally posted by Aseren:

Give up, don't fuck him over.

Having your eye on a girl doesnt exactly qualify as dibs, especially if you havent done a single thing about it in all this time.

If you cant even hold a conversation with her, then maybe you two arent compatible to begin with. If your mate has a chance to make it work, dont begrudge him.

There are enough women out there that you dont have to cock-block, even if you were -thinking- about it first.

I'd give up on this one. And learn from it.

Next time, make your move.

Did you actually call her in the first place?

I don't mean on the phone. I mean to your friend.

[This message has been edited by fullcircle (edited 10-07-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by fullcircle:

Did you actually call her in the first place?

I don't mean on the phone. I mean to your friend.



To a certain extent. He definately knew I liked her.

quote:Originally posted by Anon-User:

To a certain extent. He definately knew I liked her.



That's not clear.

Guys often express a general interest in some girl or other.

But calling a girl is explicit. As in "I really want to tap that ass" or, some variant depending on your emotional maturity.

What kind of comments did you make to your friend? How strongly did you express an interest?

Well at the party I was telling him how hot she looked, and I told him I was going to go talk to her (then did). Then like an hour later he's stumbling home with his arm around her. So I feel a little screwed over myself.

[This message has been edited by Anon-User (edited 10-07-2006).]

Why? did you talk to him afterwards? it just seems to me that he waited and gave you a shot first, then it didn't work out and he tried it for himself.. nothing wrong with that.

quote:Originally posted by Anon-User:

Well at the party I was telling him how hot she looked, and I told him I was going to go talk to her (then did). Then like an hour later he's stumbling home with his arm around her. So I feel a little screwed over myself.



Sorry man, that doesn't count as staking a claim. He has every right to pursue her, just like you have every right to do the same unless he tells you he's got a strong interest in her or hooks up with her first.

Gotta be more pro-active next time.

Alright everyone, thanks for the advice. I think what I'll do is just take a back seat, and if things end up nowhere with them (it's possible) I might have a go.

I might make an update later on. Thanks again.

Birth is suffering, aging is suffering, illness is suffering, death is suffering; union with what is displeasing is suffering; separation from what is pleasing is suffering; not to get what one wants is suffering; in brief, the five aggregates subject to clinging are suffering.

Let that shit go...if the future presents an oppurtunity, go for it...but move along and continue living life. Letting shit go is hard, but it's the key to peace.

quote:Originally posted by Hexadecimal:

Birth is suffering, aging is suffering, illness is suffering, death is suffering; union with what is displeasing is suffering; separation from what is pleasing is suffering; not to get what one wants is suffering; in brief, the five aggregates subject to clinging are suffering.



Man I can remember a time when the idea of you quoting Buddha would have been absurd.

I remember quite clearly what you were like before you disappeared from totse for a while, what was it about a year ago?

You used to be such a hardboiled cynic. You probably don't remember but I had a number of discussions with you about religion, back then I was still called "imperfectcircle".

Then one day you said you were going to take a major trip, either on LSD or DXM. A few days later you briefly mentioned that you had discovered a belief in god, or some kind of divine spirit, or something. Then you vanished.

I find the transformation astonishing personally. Very interesting.

I suppose I'll take that as a compliment. And yes, I do remember quite a few convos between us...and that trip was DXM, 2200mg I think.

I'm wondering why the switch from imperfectcircle to full circle though? Did you find the same understanding and acceptance of life, death, and their purpose as I did?

quote:Originally posted by Hexadecimal:

I'm wondering why the switch from imperfectcircle to full circle though?

It was for quite a silly reason, I said I'd get rid of my account if I didn't post a rebuttal in a MGCBTSOOYG thread and then forgot to, but kept the promise even though nobody cared. *shrugs*

quote: Did you find the same understanding and acceptance of life, death, and their purpose as I did?

Yes we seem to have fairly similar outlooks, mine has been forming for some time now but especially in the past year.

Cool stuff.