I don't cheat. I may be a horrible person and I may be disgusting and trashy, but I don't cheat. I never have, I wont say I never will, but I can't really ever see it happening.

However I'm a terrible flirt. I flirt with everyone. I flirt with the bus driver who takes me to trade school in the afternoon. It's not even a sexual thing to me. And you can Dr. Drew me or whatever and blame it on being molested as a child, but it doesn't change anything. It's my way of communication. I don't blow all these guys or anything, I'm just a friendly flirty girl who smiles a lot and enjoys attention.

My boyfriend is pretty used to this. He knows when I work people take my picture a lot and ask me for my phone number a lot (often just for networking purposes). But, I have this really bad habit... Sometimes if theres a really hot guy I'll be so into just flirting wit him that I'll actually give him my number. Then later on he'll call and I wont answer because I'm like "I have a boyfriend. Why did I give that guy my number?" and I can never tell why and then I'll feel bad because I've led on dude.

And it's not like I don't know how to say "I have a boyfriend." What I think is lacking from my vocabulary is the word "No." It seems really elementary, but sometimes I think it's hard to remember that just because you say "No" doesn't mean they're going to hate you. Once or twice I've turned guys down telling them I have a boyfriend and they've told me "I'm glad you told me. You should find your boyfriend."

Anyways, I met this gorgeous guy at a party last weekend and I ended up giving him my number. This was a bigger mistake than usual because this guy is in a band that my band plays shows with so I have no choice but to see him on a regular basis and now that I've led him on I feel like an awful person.

I really need to stop doing this. But, I guess being aware that I do it is the first step.

Cheers,

Lost

I hope I never meet you IRL.

quote:Originally posted by LostCause:

What I think is lacking from my vocabulary is the word "No." It seems really elementary, but sometimes I think it's hard to remember that just because you say "No" doesn't mean they're going to hate you.



You'd be surprised how many girls are like that, at least that's what my perception is.

Girls are encouraged to be more docile and passive than guys are when they grow up, through various conscious and unconscious influences.

Don't see it as a personal failing. It's something you can change, pick up a good self-help book on assertiveness, there are plenty of mp3s on the subject too if you use Limewire or Shareaza etc.

Is this the same section of your personality that needs you to get on stage & perform?

Do you get rushes in the same chemical ballpark from floiting as from being on stage? The same reafirmation of your 'realness'?

Errrr sumpin'?

It's really annoying to get a girl's # and find out later she has a boyfriend. I really don't understand why they'd give me their number if they already are dating someone. When I'm dating a girl and she gives out her number to other guys, that bothers me. What's the message they're giving out? Seriously, develop some self control. It's not hard to say no.

Give out fake numbers, lol.

quote:Originally posted by Sick_Boy:

Give out fake numbers, lol.

No, just... No.

quote:Originally posted by Fanglekai:

Seriously, develop some self control. It's not hard to say no.

As already said, you really should quit doing that. I hope your boyfriend is aware of this behavior, because personally I would be quite taken aback and hurt if my girlfriend flirted with everybody including the bus driver (handing out her number as she went). Self control is imperative.