Hey everyone. So I've been lurking around for a while, and decided to get off my ass and sign up. Yeah. So I've been having some problems lately, so I decided to make my first post in S&A, complaining to you about my love life. Enjoy.

My girlfriend and I were trying to make a long distance relationship work after she moved away, and it did, for a while. We broke up a few months ago, because she wanted someone who could be there with her, and I guess I understand that. We then proceeded to break up/ make up about 6 times over the course of a few months. She finally gave me the whole, "Let's still be friends, cause I love you in that brotherly sense" bullshit, but I just couldn't let her go, so we still talked, and we were really good friends.

Then school started. She proceeded to go out with about 5 guys over the course of 3 weeks, not including the guy she's going to homecoming with, or the guy she WANTS to go to homecoming with, and each guy fucking killed me. And since I, being the idiot who still wants to talk to her, am her "Guy friend she asks advice for", thats all she wants to talk about. I mean, I stll really love this girl. And I can honestly say that if she hadn't have moved, we would still be together. But she has changed so much since she moved. I don't know.

If you could follow that post, and understand it, I'd be amazed. Any advice?

Tell her to GTFO, and cut off contact until your testicles grow back.

I really should charge for advice this good.

quote:Originally posted by rabbitweed:

Tell her to GTFO, and cut off contact until your testicles grow back.

Agreed. She's using you because you're a fucking pussy.

quote:Originally posted by beatmeup_beatmedown:

Any advice?

Yes. My Girlfriend and i went through a similar stage, and i realized something. She's only doing this to you because she knows that you're always going to be there for her to come back to. You're letting her make you into a backup-boyfriend. I understand that it's going to hurt you, and i understand that nothing i can say is going to change the way you feel about her. so i won't waste time trying to convince you to ditch her for good.

What you need to do is to stop being there for her when she's down, or hurt, or needs advice. people naturally want what they can't have, and by being there for her whenever she needs you, she's at least used to having you there to lean on. if you aren't always there for her, and seem like you sometimes don't care, she will begin to try to get your care and support back.

Now, assuming that you can get to this stage (and even if you do everything i said, there's no guarantee, some things were just not meant to work) DO NOT go out with her again. Tell her that you still care about her, and that when you can be together physically, that's when you'll be boyfriend and girlfriend again. until that happens, it's best to keep it to "I love you, but i understand that a long distance relationship doesn't work for us."

I hope that helped a bit, dealing with long distance stuff can be pretty hard sometimes.

Thank you Psionicist for some actual advice.