I have a very, very hard time finding a girl that I can consider "dateable." I'm an attractive guy, and have no problems when it comes to looks or personality.

The problem doesn't lie in attracting girls, but rather with finding the right girl.

Whenver I start getting close to thinking I might ask her to be my girlfriend, I find myself pointing out flaws in them at any chance I get. It's almost as if I try and find every excuse possible not to date them.

I've found girls before that I considered girlfriend material. However, certain things happened that made it impossible, stuff that was out of both our control.

Are there issues with myself here, or am I truly not able to find a girl that I can truly enjoy myself with? The fact that I've found girls that match me makes think that there's a problem with the girls. But on the other hand the fact that I haven't had a girlfriend in over 2 years makes me think that something is wrong with my thinking.

Any advice?

That's possibly a good thing though, it means you have really set your standards for 'girlfriend material' and you wont even consider going for second best.

Sadly I didn't realise how much I actually lowered my standards for my previous girlfriend, picking out all of her personality traits now I realise that there is not one I like, this is before and after we went out.

Though I think when a person is given a second chance at a relationship that they really must realise that there is so much potential. Well that's what I feel, it means that there really is something still between you and you must take advantage of that.

But, truth is dont ever settle for second best regarding a girlfriend, keep within your own standards and eventually you will come across the right person.

</nubile rant>

I take it you are either in highschool or college, and are only interested in a long-term relationship. That doesn't make you "out of touch" or wrong in any way, it just demonstrates maturity.

You only want a relationship that you can see remaining for a while, not just senseless bullshit that will last a month or two. So don't worry about it, keep your standards where they are and you'll find the right girl sooner or later.

Stop looking. Then you'll come across her.

It sounds stupid, but shit like that works

I am the same.

Exactly.

But I like it. I don't mind being lonely for a few months or a year. As long as I get the right one.

And sometimes it does hit you hard. Very hard.

For me, it was when I found the perfect match - but her parents didn't approve of it. *sigh*

I still don't know whether to move on or not. I'm still lost - logically, i know that there is no point waiting around, but my heart just wont let it go... especially because she likes me back... hard.

anyhow.

Don't lower your standards.. just dont.

Thanks for all your replies, you really helped me realize that what I'm doing is perfectly fine.

Best of luck to all of you in finding Mrs. Right.

quote:Originally posted by Schmazz:

Thanks for all your replies, you really helped me realize that what I'm doing is perfectly fine.

Best of luck to all of you in finding Mrs. Right.

What you're doing is not fine. The reason I can tell you this is because I do the same thing. That's why I don't have relationships now. (Just the other thing).

EDIT: I meant to say that I didn't fix my problem and I don't know how to.

[This message has been edited by Rykoshet (edited 09-26-2006).]

I've only had one girlfriend my entire life, and now she is my fiance. I didn't meet her until I was 22, and we met on an online personals service. I basically put it out there that I was looking for a long term relationship, no bullshit mind games, specified what I wanted, and the replies rolled in. I'm not a loser either, just really picky. I met a really nice girl that was smart, hot, and a nymphomaniac. She was my perfect match, and I've asked her since to marry me. The best thing I ever did was wait it out for what I wanted and knew I could get, and it paid off big time. She has her minor flaws, as do I, but overall she is what I needed in my life.

Seems like you want The one Perfect girl. Sorry to break it to you there is no such thing

quote:Originally posted by SykoRob2005:

Seems like you want The one Perfect girl. Sorry to break it to you there is no such thing



Actually I feel like the OP. We're not looking for perfect, it's just, come to think of it, the girls I've gone out with never share many interests with me. I just want to find a girl who actually likes some of the stuff I like, not everything.

basically, no matter how hard you look for this perfect girl, she'll still end up suprising you when she does turn up.

then she'll probably cheat on you.

quote:Originally posted by Garfunkel:

basically, no matter how hard you look for this perfect girl, she'll still end up suprising you when she does turn up.

then she'll probably cheat on you.



LOL dude sadly you are right...thats a fuking bitch right there..