How does this sort of thing happen?

Before I could never see us happening...now I want her. I don't know how she feels about me because she hides her feelings, I've asked and still don't know.

She goes out to places alone and I get jealous thinking she's aiming to pick up - I too go out but now I can't think of anyone but her and I don't even try.

This is shitty.

To justify this thread post any experiences like this you may have had, flame me, or give advice as to what I should do in a realistic manner (If that's possible).

Can you give insight into the details of this girl?

Why you never saw yourself with her?

Why you like her now?

Wow. I know almost exactly how you feel. Only I always had a slight crush on her. Now its full blown LOVE.

If you can learn anything from me, it is make sure you are CLEAR when you do tell her, don't tell her till you are sure she likes you back, and when you tell her, make certain you are ready for "Thats nice" aka, REJECTION.

Krista and I where always close, she always leaned against me, and touched my hands, and everything like that. I loved her sweet warm touch. I told her I loved her without saying love, and now I think she hates me. Who knows? I'm going to talk to her tommarow and see how things are going and make sure she knows I was saying I love her not hate her.

Tell me how this turns out buddy.

I love you Krista :'(

Did anyone else read the topic and think of the song 'Ever Fallen In Love With Someone (You Shouldn't've Fallen In Love With) by the Buzzcocks?

Also you remind me of me and this girl that I used to like. It was really bad because we were good friends and she used to tell me about all the sex she had with other guys, because she used to sleep with me too. It got to a point where I just asked her not to tell me about any other guys that she had shagged, and then I told her that I would really like her to be my friend, but that we couldn't be friends until we severed our intimate physical and emotional contact. We stopped having sex and stopped acting like we were a couple, and both of us feel much better for it. I can go out and pull other girls because I don't feel like I have an emotional link anymore.

Of course, you could always just ask her how she feels about you. It feels really nice to talk about your emotions toward someone, and even if they don't reciprocate, you have got a huge weight off of your shoulders and a nice base on which the two of you can start forming a friendship free of intimate emotional attachment.

quote:Originally posted by Sailor-Boy:

Can you give insight into the details of this girl?

Why you never saw yourself with her?

Why you like her now?

Well she's close to my age (her being 19 me 20).

She used to live close-ish but moved away.

I never saw us together because she seemed to have nothing in common with me and to me she was just annoying and pissed me off.

And now, I really don't know what it is. We make each other laugh, we enjoy the same things and care about each other (as in friends) Before we were real assholes to one another...me moreso to her

I dunno what else to say except I mentioned (mockingly) Justin Timberlakes song 'sexy back' and she thought I meant I wanted to take sexy (her I suppose) back...to my place.

thats a common misunderstanding.

All women think ALL men want is sex.

In reality some men REALLY DO want a relationship that sex is just a plus in, and not the whole thing. I would like to have a GF that just likes to do things with me, like go to movies or ride the trail, or just cuddle on the couch or something.

But no girl believes me when I say thats all I want. Its fucking stupid because I really only desire a mate.

quote:Originally posted by helladamnleet:

thats a common misunderstanding.

All women think ALL men want is sex.

In reality some men REALLY DO want a relationship that sex is just a plus in, and not the whole thing. I would like to have a GF that just likes to do things with me, like go to movies or ride the trail, or just cuddle on the couch or something.

But no girl believes me when I say thats all I want. Its fucking stupid because I really only desire a mate.

So true

I would happily have a relationship with a girl who is compatible to me without sex whatsoever. I must admit after a year or two sex MUST happen otherwise the relationship will lose its spark/

quote:Originally posted by helladamnleet:

thats a common misunderstanding.

All women think ALL men want is sex.

In reality some men REALLY DO want a relationship that sex is just a plus in, and not the whole thing. I would like to have a GF that just likes to do things with me, like go to movies or ride the trail, or just cuddle on the couch or something.

But no girl believes me when I say thats all I want. Its fucking stupid because I really only desire a mate.

Agreed, except I ain't gonna lie I want the sex too. I'd be ok with a relationship that didn't have sex for quite some time, but after so long it needs to happen if it's that kind of relationship, otherwise you are really just friends.

i cannot get my mind off of a certain someone. i don't want to be thinking about them all the time, but i can't help it. no matter how much i try they are always on my mind. even if i manage to refuse to think about this person when i am awake, i end up dreaming of him. every time i talk to him my heart flutters and i am just so over joyed.

i guess you just can't control who you like.

You're allowing your emotions to take control of you. Just analyze the whole thing, if you really don't want to like her and allow your mind to over power the feelings.

You said that you two make eachother laugh and you now get along, I don't see the problem with allowing yourself to fall in like/love with her. You just didn't realise how compatable you two were then because your mind was controling your every action. Now she's triggered something else in you by your interesting conversations and perhaps even the distance.

I was in the same situation once with my bestfriend. I ended up telling him I 'liked' him and all he said was "okay". I was so heartbroken you can't even begin to understand. He came to live with me and I fell head-over-hills for him. I don't think I'm in love with him but I know I do love him a whole hell of a lot. He's very insecure and horrible with his emotions as well, maybe that's the reason, whatever it is I wish I wouldn't have said anything. I'm kind of over him now, I will always like him but I don't cry and I can look back on our good memories.

As far as talking to her, if she's anything like him I wouldn't just come out and tell her. Do it indirectly. Invite her out, allow her to get close to you. You need to make sure that she's attracted to you enough to express her feelings towards to you when you come out of your shell and do tell her directly. You should of course flirt with her, by that I mean with words and physical contact.

Ither way you want to handle this, moving forward or denying your emotions(which is perfectly fine. I know you're smart enough to control them) I believe you'll do fine and I wish you the best of luck!

quote:Originally posted by Cloaked Dagger:

Originally posted by helladamnleet:

thats a common misunderstanding.

All women think ALL men want is sex.

In reality some men REALLY DO want a relationship that sex is just a plus in, and not the whole thing. I would like to have a GF that just likes to do things with me, like go to movies or ride the trail, or just cuddle on the couch or something.

But no girl believes me when I say thats all I want. Its fucking stupid because I really only desire a mate.

Agreed, except I ain't gonna lie I want the sex too. I'd be ok with a relationship that didn't have sex for quite some time, but after so long it needs to happen if it's that kind of relationship, otherwise you are really just friends.

Agreed, I am just saying it can't be BUILT on sex. Sex is only a plus, you know?