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Sex and Affection Anything and everything about sex and relations. Please try to keep this forum on-topic, since things tend to wander a bit. Search through old topics before posting a new one, as questions get repeated a lot here.

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 #1 
Old 2006-09-21, 01:10
Regular
 
Default Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

Its been a while sinds I wrote anything in S&A. Haven't had any time nor will to engage in new relationships. It kinda kicks back at the inspiration to write you know, since all my eroto's are from real experience's I had.

Anyway, I managed to get layed in the most peculiar kind of way. Two weeks ago I found my self with a boner lying in a tent with 20 other people having sex with the girl next to me.

So your first reaction would be something like: "oh...ok......wtf!?" That was my thought at the time too. Anyway, to fully understand what I am talking about I'll let you in on some background information.

For the last six weeks I've been on a field exercise. I joined the army and we were apointed to our own to survive for a week with no food drops what so ever. Total isolation from the inhabited world. We had some food stored though, and we all hid away candy bars and such.

Anyway, why I'm in a tent with twenty other people makes perfectly sense now, does'nt it?

We unfortunate souls got the order to move to another location, some 20 clicks (kilometers) further away. It so happened to be that a nice quiet stream crossed our way.....or so we were told. We walked for 15 clicks across open pastures and woodlands until we reached this stream. Turned out it was the fucking Niagra's little sister. We were all very tired, hungry and cold. A rivercrossing would be a dangerous enterprise, most of all for the women who had a hard time keeping up.

Our best swimmer (not me ) swam across with a rope tied around his waiste. He made it across safely. Then the rest started wading through, clinging on the fastened rope. When it was my turn, I put one foot into the water....freezing....and went on following the girl infront of me. I had been watching that girl for some time though, typical hot blonde chick allthough stronger then you average girl. Dispite her strength she had difficulty coping with the stress and exhaustion of the last few days, been complaining about sore feet and knees, being very tired and cold all the time. I would be a pity if she didnt make it.

With that last thought I suddenly awakened from my day dream to find myself in the middle of the river staring infront of me at the blonde girl named Michelle.....Or was I?

Michelle? I asked rather quietly when she was missing from my sight. I quickly looked around and then down to the water in an effort to penetrate its darkness. The I yelled her name and yelled commands forward. "We've lost a man! Help me! Find her!" I dont know what I yelled but it was a lot.

Then I saw a hand surfacing with its fingers spread, like reaching out above. Then in an instant, Michelle surfaced, her green helmet covering her eye's by half, the weight of her rucksack combined by all the water in her clothes pulled her down again just as fast as she surfaced.

I did'nt waver for a moment, I let go of the rope and swam in her direction as fast as I could. I felt like and olympic swimmer, so fast I went being aided by the current. I reached her position within a few seconds but where was she now? I dived under, feeling the ice cold water splashing into my face. I could'nt feel her with my legs or arms so I tried opening my eye's and see but the pitch black stared right back at me.

I had to surface for air. I gasped for air and heard people yelling at me and I saw other people swimming towards. Then I dived back once more and swam in a circle as wide as possible. I didnt even knew if it was a circle nor did I knew where I was going or how deep I went. I knew I had to find her quickly! Then, with the waive of my left arm I felt the belt of her rucksack. Like an automated robotic arm my hand shut and she was firmly in my grasp.

Still, she was heavy and I could get her up. Feeling the need for air myself, I pulled her up and with my legs I felt the bottom of the river and pushed up with all my might and I managed to swim her to the surface.

As soon as we surfaced I tried keeping her head above the water and yelled for help but only coughing came out. It didnt take long for two guys to help us out of the water.

Allthough her eye's were shut, Michelle started coughing as soon as she was put on her side. She was alive.

Not 10 minutes later we both sat around a small fire with warm water, some crackers and a candy bar each. She said she was so thankfull of me saving her life. I told her that, that is what we do in the army.

We decided that our next position was not reachable anymore before night fell and we pitched our tent at the river. That evening, when we were getting ready to tuck into our sleeping bags I noticed that Michelle took extra effort into getting a place beside me to sleep. The guys were talking about cars and later food and women offcourse. Thats about it what topics are concerned. Cars, Food and Women.

Anyway, I was allready sleeping when I felt a warm hand on my chest. I opened my eye's and was amased that Michelle was leaning over me with her upper body. She lowered her head and whispered into my ear: "Your my hero, you'll keep me save".

OK, we all know what's going to happen next! So at this point I'd like to ask anyone below the age of 18 to leave.....I knew you would'nt.......OK, what I'm really interrupting for is that a short discription of Michelle is propor at this time.

She's a blonde with short to medium long hair. It was cut off during basic training. She has greyish eye's with some hints of bleu in them. Her face is quite narrow but not too slim. She has a cute little nose, and two rather thin pink lips. Unfortunatly her lips were dried out at the time for obvious reasons.

She's about 170 centimeters (I'm sorry I live in a country where they use the metric system) tall. She has long legs, and strong arms but not muscular.

Right, where were we?...Ow yes so she just whispered something into my ear. She got up a little higher and I could see her breasts through a rather loose fitting army sheart without any sleaves. If I'd had to guess I would say somewhere in between B cup and C, maybe C. Cant say for certain but they werent hangers, that's for sure. I hate hanging tits.

With both hands she quickly pulled the shirt up and uncovered her tits. Two pink nipple's stood out proudly. She was in the mood for sure. I felt down in my pants that I was getting a second tent inside this large one.

I unzipped my sleeping bag and she did that to hers. We both got rid of our underwear and I had the jackpot right in sight. She has a tender vagina, not used up like those sluts on High School. It felt like it had some meat on it, you know. Like two tender cushions lying against eachother. Her pubic hair matched the colour of her eyebrows. (A good advice by the way, pubic hair has the same colour as the eyebrows, uncoloured offcourse)

Her pubes ran from her clitoris, nicely covered by her labia. She laid down flat on her back with her arms curved and placed on either side of her head. I leaned over ontop of her. My dick was stiff as a pole. I leaned with my left arm besides her and my right hand gently massaged her left tit. Then I kissed her on the lips and brief tongue exchange followed. Then I leaned on both arms, positioning myself over her and lowered my dick. She grabbed hold of my torso with both arms and I gently pushed my penis inside her. First pushing a way the outer labia and then penetrated the inner one's. She made a very soft passionate moan when I did this and closed her eye's. I started pumping up and down. We both knew that we should'nt make any sound to awake the others.

After a few pump's I felt my back getting sore, probaly from all that walking and swimming but I didnt care.

When I felt the orgasm building I noticed that she too was getting ready to go. I could feel her muscle's tightening around my dick and she started to shiver a little. Then I heard a very soft and short "yes" coming from he mouth followed by a louder cry of passion. I covered her mouth with my hand and pressed down hard. I pumped a few more times and I could feel the warmth and tension of her orgasming on my dick. Little did I knew or I too felt a flash orgasm come up and before I could extract I blew my load right into her as she frowned and started into my eye's still dizzy from her own.

We both lay down out of breath but happy. Tired and broken but happy. Did'nt took long for us to pass out either.

All in all, I still think its kinda wierd doing something like that. Strange how women can respond in some situations don't ya think? I guess I'm really her hero now.

(EDIT: I'll do a spell check in the morning)
 #2 
Old 2006-09-21, 01:13
Regular
 
Florida, US
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

tl/dr
 #3 
Old 2006-09-21, 01:19
Gus Gus is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

3.5/5.0

Your grammar was a bit lacking, and the storyline skipped far to much. The action was nice, though, and the plot idea was good. Not too bad.
 #4 
Old 2006-09-21, 01:27
Regular
 
Moving soon.. :p
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

Yeah.. Just the grammar and mechanics of your sentence structures could be worked upon. But I did like the story.
 #5 
Old 2006-09-21, 03:43
phmeworp phmeworp is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

Learn how to write and get back to us later.
 #6 
Old 2006-09-21, 04:14
Regular
 
San Lorenzo
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

you came in her. tsk tsk.
 #7 
Old 2006-09-21, 06:33
ajardoor ajardoor is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

...So wait, the cops knew Internal Affairs was setting them up?
 #8 
Old 2006-09-21, 06:59
Regular
 
Orlando
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

quote:Originally posted by ajardoor:

...So wait, the cops knew Internal Affairs was setting them up?



From what I read, the district attorney was on their case the whole time,... up until the drug bust.
 #9 
Old 2006-09-21, 08:09
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

quote:Originally posted by Obbe:

you came in her. tsk tsk.

I know....and I'm not even sure if she took the pill, being out there for so long and all.
 #10 
Old 2006-09-21, 08:41
Moderator
 
dodging the rain and tractors
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

Strangley enough i could detect much less 'dutch thinking' in this story. Got to admit, your erotic is much better than your historical.
 #11 
Old 2006-09-21, 11:10
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Strangley enough i could detect much less 'dutch thinking' in this story. Got to admit, your erotic is much better than your historical.

I guess that's a compliment.....is it?
 #12 
Old 2006-09-21, 15:00
Twisted_Ferret Twisted_Ferret is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:

Strangley enough i could detect much less 'dutch thinking' in this story. Got to admit, your erotic is much better than your historical.

I dunno, the title cracks me up... it just seems so Dutch.
 #13 
Old 2006-09-21, 15:09
Regular
 
Georgia USA
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

I'd like to see some more bdsm erotica...I mean good stuff, not the wimpy, gay stuff people usually write.

Oh and I like it better when MEN are being tortured...By other men, please!
 #14 
Old 2006-09-21, 16:23
Mr.Happy Mr.Happy is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I'd like to see some more bdsm erotica...I mean good stuff, not the wimpy, gay stuff people usually write.

Oh and I like it better when MEN are being tortured...By other men, please!

Methinks your husband is going to end up paying a heavy price for his EAS .

It read more like a real experience than a script, which I liked. But I didn't really see it as an erotic story, the actual sex was way too brief if you wanted it to be the focus.
 #15 
Old 2006-09-21, 16:34
Flock Flock is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I'd like to see some more bdsm erotica...I mean good stuff, not the wimpy, gay stuff people usually write.

Oh and I like it better when MEN are being tortured...By other men, please!

I'll second that, but female/female or female/male is great too.
 #16 
Old 2006-09-21, 17:12
Regular
 
Georgia USA
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

Heh, yeah.:P

I don't really get off on women getting tortured...My husband thinks this is because I hate men, but I really don't! I'm just not turned on by women and one of my dirty secrets is that torture...*whispers* turns me on.
 #17 
Old 2006-09-21, 17:18
Flock Flock is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

Well I have a few sadist tendancies, and I am attracted to women, but bdsm covers a lot of things really, the possibilities are endless. http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/stories/

This site has stories, some good, some bad, but it's somewhere I go when I want a bit of a browse.

You can search by catagories etc.

I'd love to write my own, but I don't have the imagination!
 #18 
Old 2006-09-21, 17:20
Regular
 
Georgia USA
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

Mine all involve my shrink.
 #19 
Old 2006-09-21, 17:34
Gus Gus is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

Xiao Mei, I'd write you a story... Except I'd need two names (one male and one female) and where it should happen...

*Waits smiling*
 #20 
Old 2006-09-21, 18:42
doughboytl doughboytl is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

quote:Originally posted by ajardoor:

...So wait, the cops knew Internal Affairs was setting them up?

i thought it was ...so wait, the cops knew Internal Affairs were setting them up the whole time? lmao thats the best quote ive seen on all of totse in a long time....sadly.
 #21 
Old 2006-09-25, 00:50
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

yea, the title was really ment as a joke. Kinda to lure people in.

Its true though
 #22 
Old 2006-09-28, 22:36
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

*POSTS TO REACTIVATE*
 #23 
Old 2006-09-28, 22:37
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

*POSTS TO REACTIVATE AGAIN*

 #24 
Old 2006-09-28, 23:24
psychomanthis psychomanthis is offline
Regular
 
Default Re: Having a tent in a tent (long eroto script)

*Feels jealous*
 
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