I'm not sure what to do. Advice please.

Me and my girlfriend have been together for almost 2 years. As of late, it's been boring. I feel like we've fallen into a dull routine. We haven't gone out on the weekends, and I don't call her after school and she doesn't call me. I still like her, but we never hang out or have fun anymore.

In those two years I never questioned my faitfullness. Girls would hit on me and stuff, but I never even thought to try to hook up with them or anything. I met a girl and she's really cute and stuff. I can see myself with her. But I still have feelings for my girlfriend even though it's been boring lately. I can't decide what to do.

And no, I haven't talked to my girlfriend about it. Maybe someone can suggest what to say on how to bring it up?

Dangit, I'm about to enter my first relationship at the age of 20, and your problem is the exact thing that I'm scared of facing.

When will I get bored with it, and will I hurt her...

Err anyways, nope, no advice from me :

I guess you just wanna ask yourself if you wanna use more time on the relationship, whether it's worth it? You ain't getting any younger...

are you ...Uber confused?

Yah, the thing is, she sort of hinted at breaking up before college. Like I've asked her about it in the past, and she would beat around the bush. And never give me a straight answer.

Talk to her about it, it may seem awkward now, but if you really want to stay together don't let yourself get too distanced.

On the other hand, if you're just so bored that you think the spark is gone and you're done, don't draw out the ending of the relationship.

If that makes any sense.

Another thing of interest is that she is in all of my classes. Also, if we broke up I would still want to be really good friends. What do you think are the chances of that?

Speaking from experience, there will probably be bitterness no matter what.

But how long lasting will probably depend on the maturity level of the breakup and of you two. It shouldn't be that bad if you aren't an idiot about the breakup.

That is if it even happens.

I respect her too much to break up with her in a mean way, especially since I still want to be friends. (If we do break up)

[This message has been edited by Uber (edited 09-18-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Uber:

Another thing of interest is that she is in all of my classes. Also, if we broke up I would still want to be really good friends. What do you think are the chances of that?

Thats such a bad idea. If you stay friends, then you have to watch her go through other guys, and more then likely hear about them first hand.

Also, with two years of history, a breakup is going to be really hard. When you're that comfortable with someone, it's hard to turn away. And you really start to miss them when they're gone.

I'm not saying its not the right thing to do, but...it just isnt easy. If you're feeling bored though, especially during the college years, it's important to explore yourself and just live. It might be better for both of you to take some time apart. Explore other girls. Be young, screw around, have fun. Who knows? In a few years...you'll both know what you want better then you do now, and you may decide that you want to make things work.

quote:Originally posted by SilentMind:

Explore other girls. Be young, screw around, have fun.

Yah, I got the same advice from a friend. I mean, you're only this age once, and why waste it being bored?



[This message has been edited by Uber (edited 09-19-2006).]

Listen. If you take our advice here, there's a chance it will be right and work out, but there's also a good chance that it won't be. just take a weekend by yourself, and really explore how you feel about being with her, how you would fare if you broke up, and just how you feel about the whole thing in general. This is one of those things where you'll be a million times better iff if you take some time and figure it out on your own, trust me.

You need to talk to your girlfriend. You need to tell her that you feel the relationship has gotten boring. The two of you have got to figure out if the relationship is worth fixing. If you want to fix your relationship you and your girlfriend need to start putting a little extra effort into keeping things exciting.

Every relationship has its problems but the key to fixing them is communication.

It's my belief that it's immoral to stay with someone you're not interested in. Yes, immoral. It's false. And it only leads to hurt feelings. If you break it off the moment you realize you're not interested, or at least alert her of your feelings the moment they arise, you avoid the pain that is caused by the realization that the other person has been hiding their lack of interest for quite some time. Incidentally, staying with someone you're not interested in leads to cheating.