I was talking to a close girl, and she said she would rather marry someone who had sex rather than a virgin who waited.

I said I was trying to wait (isin't difficult) until Im married then my sig other would know I blah blah waited cause I blah blah cared for them blah blah

but she said that she would be pissed if her husband didn't have any experience.

Am Ijust stupid for trying to wait or are both of us right or is she just right? *Put downs a must*

Yeah, you're stupid to wait.

If you don't learn what you NEED in bed, and you marry someone based purely on that expecting sunshine, buttercups, and rainbows... You'll be fucked.

And not in the good way. In the very bad "Oh my god DIVORCE" way.

idk, really.

unless i marry my current boyfriend ( i hope xiao didnt read that), then i would want a guy that isnt a virgin. my boyfriend and i were both virgins, so i would still feel like he waited for me, idk how to explain it. im all tired and shit.

anyway, if she isnt a virgin and you are, that might be kinda weird. i would if i had to show a guy what to do all the time. and i would feel hoey for not being a virgin.

just, don't put it on a petistal. virginity is not that big of a deal. just don't be a slut. no girl is ever happy to find out you slept with half the girls in town. if you are in a relationship and feel that sex would be good, then have sex. if you don't feel you are ready, don't have sex.

do not base having sex or not on what totse says. be true to yourself.

The answer is simple. Do everything in bed with her except have intercourse. Become good at giving her head and your future wife will have no complaints.

quote:Originally posted by Gus:

Yeah, you're stupid to wait.

If you don't learn what you NEED in bed, and you marry someone based purely on that expecting sunshine, buttercups, and rainbows... You'll be fucked.

And not in the good way. In the very bad "Oh my god DIVORCE" way.



This ladies and gents, explains our high divorce rate.

quote:Originally posted by RogueWarheart:



This ladies and gents, explains our high divorce rate.

Meh, usually it's the other way around... Usually.

There are always insane people, though.

Now, go and listen to Jack. It doesn't count as sex if you've got a rubber on!

I'll be real, I was raised in Church so Ive got this whole guilt thing if I don't wait blah blah, But I agree with everybody that my future so and so would get pissed at me if I were unsatisfactory. I know that its dumb and that theres no buttercups and rainbows, But theres this wall thats like: GOD WILL SMOTE YOU.

I don't know why I still think that stuff. My brother said to me-"get in a serious relationship, then have sex, then when your married it will be fine" But I have to figure out in my head how to get over the mentality thing.

quote:Originally posted by Siash:

I'll be real, I was raised in Church so Ive got this whole guilt thing if I don't wait blah blah, But I agree with everybody that my future so and so would get pissed at me if I were unsatisfactory. I know that its dumb and that theres no buttercups and rainbows, But theres this wall thats like: GOD WILL SMOTE YOU.

I don't know why I still think that stuff. My brother said to me-"get in a serious relationship, then have sex, then when your married it will be fine" But I have to figure out in my head how to get over the mentality thing.



Same here, same for several people here. That little nagging voice will never go. I wish i could say it does go but it doesn't...you just learn to live with it.

its threads like these that make me glad i was not brought up with religion.

you can say that religion will put morals and goodness into a person, but i am a good person with morals and religionlessness. i just feel like all religion does to people these days is fuck with their minds. can't it be enough just to be nice to everyone and cause no harm? to be good to the world around you, isn't that enough? if there is a God, i would like to think he is not a narcisistic as to want everyone to obey him in certain ways. i would like to think that all he wants is happiness.

and clearly, this situation is not making you happy.

sorry for the useless "my god..." comment. i just had to get it off my chest, its been floating in my mind today.

Oral F thats a good point.

Im messed up but Im not angry that religion fucked me up, it gives me a community kind of. And your right, you can be a good person with good morals and not have religion, but then there are those who would be rapist killers if they didn't blah blah.

But I think I'll just find somebody and get serious, hell that should be helpfull to tella girl "i wanted to wait until marridge but your so damn beautiful.."

quote:Originally posted by Siash:

I'll be real, I was raised in Church so Ive got this whole guilt thing if I don't wait blah blah, But I agree with everybody that my future so and so would get pissed at me if I were unsatisfactory. I know that its dumb and that theres no buttercups and rainbows, But theres this wall thats like: GOD WILL SMOTE YOU.

Lol. I just watched the movie Saved!, and this reminds me so much of that movie.

Just thought I'd mention...

if you do, you do, if you don't you don't. there's no sence in worrying about it. if you're being pressured, that's bad, but otherwise things will happen on their own. one day you might just finnally decide, you know what? i'm ready for this. or you may say, no, this is not what i'm ready to do until i'm in a married state of being. generally speaking people have pretty long lives, so there's plenty of time to make up your mind. If you're worried about whether your 'inexperience' in that area would warrent something as rediculous as immediate divorce, chillax, if your significant other really cares, they're probubly not gunna worry about 'educating' you. hell, that shit's kinda hot.

i have heard of divorce because the husband refused to have sex at all, like, after two years of normal marriage. that was crazy.

Thing is, if you wait and wait till you sex, the excitement is going to build up and you're going to get really excited. And then.. because it's your first and you're nervous and not sure what to do, theres a chance it will really suck . and then you'll be really pissed off for having waited so long.

quote:Originally posted by Siash:

I'll be real, I was raised in Church so Ive got this whole guilt thing if I don't wait blah blah, But I agree with everybody that my future so and so would get pissed at me if I were unsatisfactory. I know that its dumb and that theres no buttercups and rainbows, But theres this wall thats like: GOD WILL SMOTE YOU.

I don't know why I still think that stuff. My brother said to me-"get in a serious relationship, then have sex, then when your married it will be fine" But I have to figure out in my head how to get over the mentality thing.



If god didnt want people to do sex,he wouldnt have made them with all these weird little bits and pieces.



Your god sounds fucked up and weird. My god just likes to be worshipped through dance and shiny things and thankfullness.

Not some bitter judgemental god that's going to smite you for something as mundane as having a bit of innocent fun.

I've never slept with a virgin but I was a guy's second girl once and he sucked.

I don't see why anyone would deny themselves until they get married.

Is she trying to get you to marry her?



I suggest running.

Romantic love and virginity are equally stupid ideas, that when combined in some manner are destined to rip a hole in the space time continuum.

quote:Originally posted by jackketch:



Same here, same for several people here. That little nagging voice will never go. I wish i could say it does go but it doesn't...you just learn to live with it.

ive muzzled my inner voice,ive found the older i get the less my consious(sp)bothers me about anything

quote:Originally posted by Siash:

And your right, you can be a good person with good morals and not have religion, but then there are those who would be rapist killers if they didn't blah blah.

But I think I'll just find somebody and get serious, hell that should be helpfull to tella girl "i wanted to wait until marridge but your so damn beautiful.."

Well, the beautiful comment makes it seems more about sex for lust, than sex for love and lust.

And I don't think religion stops people from sinning half the time :-P

We still kill, we still rape, we still get divorces and have sex before marriage, Most people whom claim to be religious, really aren't that much.

Take for example your typical rapper.

He has a 50,000 cross around his neck, yet his songs are about raping chicks, doing drugs, and killing people.

We are who we want to be, religion works when it's convinent :-P Or we'd still be eating fish once a week ^_^

Just think, is the girl WORTH it, like really worth it? Is she the kind you can take home to your parents? speak adoringly about to your friends? Wouldn't mind admitting to anyone? (minus the sex part of course, since you feel guilty about it)

*insert streotypical responce* Just make sure she's the right one for you.

Religion is weird, no offense.

I just don't get how Eve can have sex with her kids but some random guy/girl cant have sex before their married.

I mean COME ON, Eve had pre-marital incestuous sex.

Sounds like you are suffering from homosexuality. Have a glass of water and lay down for a little bit until you feel normal again.

quote:Originally posted by Suicide_Mouse:

Religion is weird, no offense.

I just don't get how Eve can have sex with her kids but some random guy/girl cant have sex before their married.

I mean COME ON, Eve had pre-marital incestuous sex.

Holy shit, you're right! somebody call the pope!