When I was younger, growing up through middle school and highschool I used to daydream about beautiful sexy women and sex, I used to masterbate alot....as anyone that age would. After getting into a relationship and having a kid too young I grew up a little too fast and through all of it I completely lost the will to have sex, masterbate, or even think about women at all. It's left me a little bit bitter but at the same time It's taken a huge burden off of me, having a sex drive is like having a monster inside of you that always wants to selfishly be fed. My "monster" is dead, that fucker will never get fed again or waste another ounce of my thoughts. Your thoughts on this Totse?

I think your life is no longer worth living.

Good for you.

No, it's not necessary as you've proven, yourself. But, though, it's very high up there on the chain-of-life for most, if not all, people (at one time in their life, at least).

And it helps keep me sane... Otherwise I start humping legs at cocktail parties.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I think your life is no longer worth living.

You're halfway right, It's still worth living but not for myself, just the people around me.

you let bad experiences ruin something truely great about life.

that's sad.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I think your life is no longer worth living.

What? There are plenty of good feelings that aren't sexual.

quote:Originally posted by Keriba:

What? There are plenty of good feelings that aren't sexual.

Yeah, but there are plenty that are sexual.

Yeah, but you can get along fine without them.

And you can get along fine with it...

quote:Originally posted by Keriba:

Yeah, but you can get along fine without them.

i don't get along all that well.

when i had to go without it i kept having sex dreams and toughts of cheating on my boyfriend. AND THAT'S NOT GOOD!

quote:Originally posted by Keriba:

What? There are plenty of good feelings that aren't sexual.

But face it, sex is one of the best parts of life! If I don't have sex for a day or two...I start to get anxious and snappish. Even just making out for a while is fun...How could someone not want to have sex!?

quote:Originally posted by oral fixation:

i don't get along all that well.

when i had to go without it i kept having sex dreams and toughts of cheating on my boyfriend. AND THAT'S NOT GOOD!

Sex dreams ARE good! I have them a lot, whether I've had sex that day or not.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:



Sex dreams ARE good! I have them a lot, whether I've had sex that day or not.



well, they were about the guy i wanted to cheat with.....so............



yeah.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

But face it, sex is one of the best parts of life! If I don't have sex for a day or two...I start to get anxious and snappish. Even just making out for a while is fun...How could someone not want to have sex!?

I dunno, maybe it is to some people. I'm not against sex or anything. But I never have sex or think about it or anything and I'm perfectly happy. So I don't think that just because you don't care about sex or anything sexual makes your life not worth living.

quote:Originally posted by oral fixation:

well, they were about the guy i wanted to cheat with.....so............



yeah.

As long as it was just dreams and fantasies, who does it hurt? I fantasise about men other than my husband, but I don't think it's any big deal. Unlike what the church believes, thinking about something isn't as bad as doing it. You have to be a little naughty to spice up life!

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:



As long as it was just dreams and fantasies, who does it hurt? I fantasise about men other than my husband, but I don't think it's any big deal. Unlike what the church believes, thinking about something isn't as bad as doing it. You have to be a little naughty to spice up life!



well, it didn't all occur in dreamland...so...blah....

i believe masturbation is a waste, i'm not suggesting i get laid 24/7 or every week. but some dudes fap 3 times a day, that's really sad.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

But face it, sex is one of the best parts of life!

No it's not. It's a pleasant bonus, nothing more. I feel sorry for you if only sex gives your life enough meaning to be worth living.

I said ONE of the best parts of life, my little hombre.

quote:Originally posted by oral fixation:

well, it didn't all occur in dreamland...so...blah....



Why do people feel bad about just THINKING? Feel bad when you actually cheat, not before.

we need to save this motherfucker!!! QUCIK NEKID PICS!!! Have you tried looking at porn just do it allday till you have the urge to fap.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I said ONE of the best parts of life, my little hombre.



quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

I think your life is no longer worth living.

Are sex and masturbation necessary? Is chocolate necessary? Alcohol? Movies? Music? The internet? Totse? I think it's the things that aren't necessary that make life a joy.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

Are sex and masturbation necessary? Is chocolate necessary? Alcohol? Movies? Music? The internet? Totse? I think it's the things that aren't necessary that make life a joy.

I can't disagree with that, but all of these unnecessary things go rancid and turn against you. You like Alcohol? How about when you're liver starts to fail. You like Chocolate? Will you like it so much when you wake up and realize you weigh 300 lbs? Totse is nice, but it's not so nice when I realize I've been sitting on it all day and not doing anything productive. Sex, sure it's great. Is it great anymore when it's created you more grief than pleasure? Everything has a polar opposite.

Moderation is the key to keeping a sweet pleasure sweet and pleasurable, and not an addiction.

That said, though, I'd much rather be addicted to sex than some of the other less-forgiving things out there.

quote:Originally posted by Villrux:

I can't disagree with that, but all of these unnecessary things go rancid and turn against you. You like Alcohol? How about when you're liver starts to fail. You like Chocolate? Will you like it so much when you wake up and realize you weigh 300 lbs? Totse is nice, but it's not so nice when I realize I've been sitting on it all day and not doing anything productive. Sex, sure it's great. Is it great anymore when it's created you more grief than pleasure? Everything has a polar opposite.

Like Gus said, moderation. A few drinks a week, a piece of chocolate every few days...theses things are meant to be enjoyed. If you are truly of the opinion that these things are not enjoyable because they are not genuine "pleasures" if they end in "pain," I would suggest you read Utopia, because Sir Thomas More couldn't agree with you...more.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:



Why do people feel bad about just THINKING? Feel bad when you actually cheat, not before.



well....lets jsut say things occured outside of my mind as well...

quote:Originally posted by oral fixation:

well....lets jsut say things occured outside of my mind as well...

Yeah, yeah, just come out and say it..

Did you fuck the other guy, or just blow him?

Cheating is one of those things that I feel should not be forgiven. If you want to be in a relationship, then be in one. If you want to sleep around, then sleep around.

If you can't handle not having both, you don't deserve either.

No, it's not necessary.

But I like the way you approached it. You weren't rude about it, like that Myron kid.

Anyway, you might subconciously connect sexual activity with the stress of having a kid too young? Just like certain drugs feel the same to me, but I can't do them anymore because I subconciously connect that particular feeling to feeling like I'm going to die.

I dont really care, After a tough day or something, i might come home and masturbate, itll just make me fell better,

quote:Originally posted by firekitty751:

No, it's not necessary.

But I like the way you approached it. You weren't rude about it, like that Myron kid.

Anyway, you might subconciously connect sexual activity with the stress of having a kid too young? Just like certain drugs feel the same to me, but I can't do them anymore because I subconciously connect that particular feeling to feeling like I'm going to die.

Of course, bad subconcious connections to things are the reason your will breaks after awhile when it comes to doing them. It can apply to anything, even something as simple as not liking a certain food that you used to love because you ate it when you had the flu. I'm more than well aware of the reasons I feel the way I do.

EDIT : My son is not one of them, children are one of the posotive things that come from sex. It's a whole mess of other things.

[This message has been edited by Villrux (edited 09-14-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by oral fixation:

well....lets jsut say things occured outside of my mind as well...

And the plot thickens...

I'm actually all for you upgrading to a new guy, so BRAVO and keep it up!

quote:Originally posted by Gus:

Yeah, yeah, just come out and say it..

Did you fuck the other guy, or just blow him?

Cheating is one of those things that I feel should not be forgiven. If you want to be in a relationship, then be in one. If you want to sleep around, then sleep around.

If you can't handle not having both, you don't deserve either.



Don't judge her, you don't know what her life is like or what her motivation was.

And seriously, you consider it somehow less bad if she DID just blow the guy?!

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

Don't judge her, you don't know what her life is like or what her motivation was.

And seriously, you consider it somehow less bad if she DID just blow the guy?!

It doesn't matter what her life was like, and I think the motivation in a situation like that is quite obvious. The point is you don't make a commitment to one person and fool around with another one no matter what your reason is. He's simply saying if you want to devote yourself to one person then do it, If you don't then don't. There are no shades of grey on the matter.

There isn't just ONE motivation for infidelity.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

Don't judge her, you don't know what her life is like or what her motivation was.

Yeah! She's probably starved and beaten and shit! "I had to cheat... my mommy hit me when I was little!"

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

Don't judge her, you don't know what her life is like or what her motivation was.

And seriously, you consider it somehow less bad if she DID just blow the guy?!

As a human being I'm going to judge everyone.

She's hinting very obviously, which means she wants talk about it, but she's not saying, which means she fears it being known or doesn't want to chance something or whatnot... Her motives...

It was far too annoying to NOT comment on, as she obviously wanted someone to, comment on it, as you didn't seem to understand it, at all.

Oh, and really I don't think blowing someone is better... It's worse, if anything. But it's still cheating, and she's made it clear that a lack of sex has caused her to have cheating dreams (and actions)...

So please get off my balls, as they don't take kindly to that kinda action.

Don't get me wrong, I think cheating is teh asshole thing to do. I've been cheated on and it hurt me worse than almost anything ever has.

I'm just saying not everyone who cheats is like this evil person or something. Also her boyfriend is a TOTAL ass pirate and deserves misery.

i havent had sex for 16 years and i dont feel my life has nothing in it(mearly very little)

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

Don't get me wrong, I think cheating is teh asshole thing to do. I've been cheated on and it hurt me worse than almost anything ever has.

I'm just saying not everyone who cheats is like this evil person or something. Also her boyfriend is a TOTAL ass pirate and deserves misery.

No one deserves to be cheated on. If you don't lke someone, don't be with him/her. It's that simple. If you can't handle being with someone, then don't be with them. If you want to cheat, nearly to the point that you do cheat, THEN DON'T BE WITH THEM.

You're ruining what little trust you might have left, in yourself along with anyone that hears that you cheat. But I guess I'm too much of an idealist, eh?

And it really is. Most people, though, that stick with people that hurt them mentally and physically stick with them because of issues with their childhood, and they actually LOOK and CRAVE that.

It's her own problem, then, if her boyfriend gives her what she doesn't know she needs. But, though, that's most people. The rest are just idiots that don't see.

And I'm speaking for personal experience here, so don't dare try and tell me my words are too hard. If anything, they aren't hard enough.

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

Don't get me wrong, I think cheating is teh asshole thing to do. I've been cheated on and it hurt me worse than almost anything ever has.

I'm just saying not everyone who cheats is like this evil person or something. Also her boyfriend is a TOTAL ass pirate and deserves misery.



Yes, actually everyone who does cheat is an evil person, because they hid from someone who they had built trust with their true intentions and didn't reveal them until it was too late and they caused severe damage. Just like Gus said, If you're at the point where you feel the need to cheat then explain that to your partner and come to a resolution or break it off. Don't go behind their back and then tell them after the fact, that's the point where you've become dishonorable, broken trust, hurt someone very badly, and all that good stuff.

I understand what you mean. But thankfully my sex drive is not dead. Sorry to hear that.

Sex is fun, aswell as masturbation. It gives you the natural high.

quote:Originally posted by lauren7249:

Like Gus said, moderation.

I'm qualified.

quote:And I'm speaking for personal experience here, so don't dare try and tell me my words are too hard. If anything, they aren't hard enough.[/B]

Like I said, I was cheated on by my HUSBAND, so I understand how it can feel. I chose to stay with hum because I love him and also he really was sorry for doing it and we went to a marraige counselor who helped us work things out.

I just think it's short sighted to lump everyone who cheats into the "evil" category. My husband cheated on me because he was immature and believed I'd never find out. That doesn't make him a bad person, just a selfish one. (at the time)

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

And the plot thickens...

I'm actually all for you upgrading to a new guy, so BRAVO and keep it up!



nope, even if he wanted to he lives 2 1/2 hours away now so not even an option.

edit: and things have changed between me and my boyfriend. our whole situation in life has changed, and for the better. that guy was there for me (not going to say how exactly, think what you like) when i needed him, and i for him. we are both in very serious relationships, and now appreciate our significant others more.

and i forget who said it, but: to the guy who said i was hinting at something because i wanted to tell someone about, i was just talking to xiao. as i know she has a violent hate towards my boyfriend and appears to be at least semi concerned with my relationship with at.

[This message has been edited by oral fixation (edited 09-14-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

That doesn't make him a bad person, just a selfish one. (at the time)

Actually, that does make him a bad person. But then again, love blinds you to the most obvious things. A rapist rapes, a murder murders, and a cheater cheats. Who's to say he won't do it again, or isn't even doing it, right now? You can't, obviously, as you didn't know, before, did you?

And my point still stands completely untouched... Don't make a promise that you cannot keep. If you say you're going to be with someone, don't go and break that by cheating on them.

If you do, you don't deserve to be together anymore. And if they'll accept you back, they don't deserve to have a relationship. :\

quote:Originally posted by Gus:

Actually, that does make him a bad person. But then again, love blinds you to the most obvious things. A rapist rapes, a murder murders, and a cheater cheats. Who's to say he won't do it again, or isn't even doing it, right now? You can't, obviously, as you didn't know, before, did you?

And my point still stands completely untouched... Don't make a promise that you cannot keep. If you say you're going to be with someone, don't go and break that by cheating on them.

If you do, you don't deserve to be together anymore. And if they'll accept you back, they don't deserve to have a relationship. :\



have your opinions if you must. but if you can't forgive someone for making a mistake, which we are all human and make mistakes....just like we judge, then you don't deserve that person to begin with. if you really love someone, like xiao loves her husband, a mistake is forgivable. if my boyfriend goes out and fucks someone and i find out i will forgive him. not because i have made my own mistakes, whatever they are, but because i do care for him deeply. and i won't let a one time situation where he wanted to blow his load in another pussy/mouth/ass/whatever get in the way of all the nonsexual things in a relationship. as long as he didnt have and affair, which is a true break of trust.

quote:Originally posted by oral fixation:

have your opinions if you must. but if you can't forgive someone for making a mistake, which we are all human and make mistakes....just like we judge, then you don't deserve that person to begin with. if you really love someone, like xiao loves her husband, a mistake is forgivable.

I can appreciate forgiveness and understanding, and have applied it myself.

I have to agree with Gus though, cheating is not a mistake. It's a choice.

[This message has been edited by Euda (edited 09-14-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Euda:

I can appreciate forgiveness and understanding, and have applied it myself.

I have to agree with Gus though, cheating is not a mistake. It's a choice.





ok, then i would forgive him for making a bad decision.

again, as humans, we all make bad choices.

quote:Originally posted by oral fixation:

again, as humans, we all make bad choices.

Indeed. Sadly, offering up forgiveness and understanding can sometimes be one of these bad choices.

Edit: I have to wonder about your views on close female friends. Would you consider having a close female friend, other than yourself, to be a breach of trust? An affair?

[This message has been edited by Euda (edited 09-14-2006).]

quote:Originally posted by Euda:

Indeed. Sadly, offering up forgiveness and understanding can sometimes be one of these bad choices.



just as being cold hearted and refusing to forgive can. every situation is different. i would forgive my boyfriend, but if he and i end up spliting up i dont know if i would forgive my next.

It's not about that it's wrong... It's that people say they won't do it, and then do it.

An open relationship ALLOWS for people to live out these natural needs. If you, like nearly ever other person on this planet, won't be happy with just one person then maybe you should really think about an open relationship...

You can fuck other people, but there are rules you make together, and whatnot. Sometimes you can't do it without asking, other times you just don't tell the other person, and other times they have to be able to watch...

But when you go and DESTROY any trust I had in you, then that's when it's not forgivable. You aren't worthy of ME, then, after you become a cheater. A lying person that can't control themselves, even when it's easy to do as such. :\

EDiT: And this is the last time I'm posting in this topic. We're saying the same things, back and forth. We have different ideals. We think differently. And we won't change each other.

*Extends the olive branch further still*

I accept you for who you are, even if I don't agree with it. I accept, and merely hope you can accept me for who I am.

[This message has been edited by Gus (edited 09-14-2006).]

Okay, but you were wrong to say my husband is a bad person. He is superior to any other man I have ever encountered or heard of.

quote:Originally posted by Euda:



Edit: I have to wonder about your views on close female friends. Would you consider having a close female friend, other than yourself, to be a breach of trust? An affair?



i really don't know how i would feel. i would not consider it cheating, but i might feel uncomfortable with it simply because he has never really had female friends before.

although one time he did take me to hooters because this girl he was friends with in class worked there and she asked him to go. it was kinda odd, but i guess since he brought me it actually made me feel more comfortable than if he had just went by himself.

i don't really care if i ever have sex again but dear lord i would kill someone if i lost my arms and couldn't masterbate

You could learn to whack with your feet.

possible with both but what if i lost my legs aswell

quote:Originally posted by spoonhead:

possible with both but what if i lost my legs aswell

You get the flexibility of a yoga master ferret and perform autofellatio?

Also, for the record, I agree with everything Gus said.

That's because you want to be his catcher.

quote:Originally posted by Byss:

You get the flexibility of a yoga master ferret and perform autofellatio?

Also, for the record, I agree with everything Gus said.

but what happens if my penor fell off

quote:Originally posted by Xiao Mei:

upgrading to a new guy

Because the cheating cunt deserves something better. Yeah right

as to love. love is not blind, its retarded.

if you take to equally beautiful women and make one an absolute nympho without anything else and the other someone who wants to talk, etc (no sex) the nympho will be chosen almost every single time.

Sex/Masturbation is nice but as long as its remains to be put up on a pedestal, we just become obsessed with it and it takes that enjoyable edge off it. ie alcohol. With company both (sex/masturbation and alcohol) are excellent but otherwise both become stale after a while.

It's really suprising to see the high regard in which all of you hold sex, like it's equivalent to eating or breathing. I can't comprehend where you guys are comin from.