I haven't had a girlfriend for many years and figure it's about fucking time i get one as i'll be out of highschool soon. I take all academic classes in canada so the girls im near all have facial hair and are from countries where there is no deoderant. except there is this one asian girl who i am very attracted to and i want to make a move on her but i am too insecure and unconfident. This is going to be my first real attempt at getting a girl so i'm going to keep myself looking clean and stuff but is there any advice any of you have that could help me like converstatipn starters or just ways to have more confidence/look liek i have more confidence?

You can't always wait for the situation to happen. You have to make the situation happen. Just initiate conversation with her, and keep talking to her often. She'll get comfortable around you. Then when you know she feels comfortable with you, maybe after a few weeks of talking a little bit during school, ask her what she's doing on the weekend. Ask if she'd like to hang with you. Exchange numbers. Simple, honest, effective.

The confidence part is harder. I think a good bit of advice is to tell yourself "You're intelligent. You're attractive," or something like that. If you compliment yourself, you'll feel better and be more confident. Don't worry about failure. Don't worry about things not going how you planned. Life isn't about total control; it's about adaptation and just dealing with whatever the situation may be. YOU have to initiate this whole process though, or it'll never happen. Go get started!

Yeah that's what im thinking its time to stop waiting around and actually try. I have been trying to keep my chinup/chest out a bit becaue i usually walk with my head down and switched my habit of smoking weed before my classes to low doses of stimulants such as caffeine and amphetamine to help keep the words flowing as i'm not very social. I have a whole semester to pursue this girl and i think i can actully be successfull because she just hangs out with dopey chinese guys and it's not like im going after someone impossible for me.

Confidence is an on-going process, you can't find it out there, which is called normalization. But you have to have that definition of what confidence is. What does it mean? Then the criteria of how to do it.

What will you be thinking when you've got it?

What won't you be thinking when you've got it?

What will you be thinking when you don't have it?

What won't you be thinking when you don't have it?

You have to move through these steps.

Confidence is from experience, nothing builds confidence but sexual competance. That's a major builder.

Confused? That's the first step to understanding.

Use this knowledge now.

quote:Originally posted by jellyfish:

I take all academic classes in canada so the girls im near all have facial hair and are from countries where there is no deoderant.

What the fuck? i take all academic classes, IN CANADA, and all the chicks i sit by are smokin (well, there are the usual exceptions to the rule). But seriously, you have to be pretty shallow to not wanna bone (date...whatever) any girls in a high school. Hell, the academic ones are awesome, nerds are HOT!